CH 97

The hunt has begun in earnest. 

At the beginning of the forest, there were only imperial knights, a few men not attending the hunt, and women waiting for the men who had left to hunt.

Lucia looked around awkwardly.

Herwin made an unusual fuss, and people around her were gossiping.

She knew what they were going to say, and she was getting a little tired of it.

‘Is there any place to run away for a second?’

Lucia looked around, trying to avoid the stares. 

As she looked around to see if she could find Christine, someone stepped in front of her.

“Lady Agnes.”

“……Lady Jayson?”

It was Celine. Flustered, Lucia turned to look at her, confused.

“If you have time, can I talk to you for a moment?”

“You mean you want to talk to me?”

“Yes.”

The words were so abrupt that Lucia trembled a little. For a moment, though, she could see Celine’s nervousness overlapping with Bern’s just before he left for the hunt.

After a moment’s consideration, Lucia nodded. They moved to a less crowded spot.

“What is it you want to tell me?”

Not feeling like she was in the mood for a rant, Lucia cut to the chase.

Celine decided it was a good idea, too, and let out a shaky breath and narrowed her eyes.

“I’m going to come right out and say it: I’m in love with the Marquis of Casper.”

Lucia winced at the familiarity of that statement. 

The way Celine looked at him, the way she acted, it was almost strange that she didn’t know she was in love with him.

When Lucia remained silent, Celine spoke.

“As you may know, my lady, I was once in love with the Marquis, until I married another man and we were forced to part ways.”

Lucia was inwardly surprised that Celine was so forthcoming with her story. 

‘That’s not the kind of story you tell anyone.’

Amazingly, she would reveal something so vulnerable.

“But even after we broke up, I never once forgot the Marquis of Casper, only endlessly regretted that I had hurt him with my heartless words, and realized in hindsight that I had made the wrong choice.”

She remembered the story Bern had told her about their past. Celine had said goodbye to him with hurtful words.

Looking at her now, it didn’t seem like she was lying.

“I have to be with Bern, I can’t live without him anymore.”

Celine’s calm voice faltered and her eyes filled with tears.

For a moment, Lucia almost wiped her tears away, but she clenched her fists.

“I know it’s really insensitive of me to do this to you, young lady, but I’m going to ask you this: please, break up with him.”

Finally, tears fell from Celine’s eyes. She tried to control her rising emotions. But once she burst into tears, they weren’t easy to control.

Lucia remained silent as she listened to Celine.

She didn’t know what to say.

To be honest, she’d kind of seen this coming, ever since Celine had called for her, ever since Bern had told her they’d talk about it later.

‘It’s not that Bern can’t do it for me, but…….’

He was definitely a different person when he was with Celine. 

It wasn’t that there was any discrimination in the way he treated her. 

Rather, whenever he bumped into her or mentioned her, he would deliberately change the subject and try to avoid her.

It was as if he wanted to assert that he was unwavering and innocent of Celine, but Lucia saw through it.

‘The fact that you’re visibly trying to exclude Celine shows that you already have your mind made up.’

Whenever she saw Bern with Celine, she could tell he was being himself, unadorned.

‘He always seemed to be wearing a mask.’

Bern was always a kind, caring person. But Lucia couldn’t help but feel that he was wearing a mask.

It wasn’t pretentious, but more like he was trying to put on a good face.

‘Well, I guess that’s me too.’

It wasn’t Bern’s fault. Lucia, like Bern, had put a mask on her face, trying to be nice to him, and hadn’t told him everything.

Pshhh. 

A faint laugh escaped Lucia’s lips.

She thought they had gotten a lot closer, but then she realized they hadn’t gotten past their barriers yet.

“You don’t believe me……?”

Celine’s voice came out of nowhere. Lucia snapped out of her reverie and looked up.

Celine was now right in front of her, nervously grabbing her hand.

“I’m not asking you to do this out of the blue. I’m just saying that I think it would be better for you if you two broke up.”

“Good for me?”

Lucia was dumbfounded by the offhand remark. 

“Yes, it may be presumptuous of me to think so, but Young lady… you have someone else in mind, don’t you?”

For a moment, Lucia’s heart sank. She hadn’t expected Celine to mention Herwin.

“Did you …… do a background check on me?”

“To be honest… yes, a little. I was just curious to see what Bern’s fiancée was like, so I’m sorry if I offended you.”

Celine continued to apologize in a low voice, trying not to offend Lucia.

Still, Lucia couldn’t hide her displeasure.

‘No, let’s stay calm.’

She took a breath to calm herself. 

‘You said there was a rumor in society in the first place.’

Besides, at a tea party with Celine, a young lady rudely asked her what had become of Herwin.

At that point, Celine would have known about the rumors about her without having to do any research.

She’d been Bern’s fiancée all this time and hadn’t been involved with Herwin, so she’d overreacted.

“Whoa…….”

Lucia exhaled a deep, calming breath. Celine fidgeted with her mouth closed.

Sensing no malice in her, Lucia finally lifted her head.

“Go on, my lady. I’m curious to know in what way this breakup is good for me.”

Celine bit her lip as she saw the friendly wall sink low, but she couldn’t back down from this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

“I know you two are lovelessly engaged, and I know you have other people in your hearts.”

Lucia was silent for a moment, then nodded obediently.

“I’m not sure how you came to be engaged, but I don’t think it makes sense for you to be engaged when you both have someone else in mind. You have other options.”

“……….”

Lucia suddenly remembered Herwin confessing to her.

Yes, Celine was right, what she wanted most was a future with the one she loved, not a formal engagement like this.

“I don’t know what your story is, young lady. But objectively, you seemed more at ease with Phoenaeus than with Bern, and I could see that you love him.”

Lucia lifted her head. She wondered if Celine was lying to turn the situation in her favor, but Celine was serious. 

“And Phoenaeus seemed to have love in his heart, too.”

Lucia’s hand twitched. She couldn’t believe that someone else could see it, too.

“I’m sure that, like me, you want to be connected to someone you truly love-no, isn’t that what everyone wants?”

“Someone I love…….”

Yes, she said, she still loved him, and he loved her back.

If Celine is right, it’s only a matter of time before she marries him.

Something she’s dreamed of doing since the moment she fell in love with him many years ago. But it seemed so far away. 

Even if he was in love with her now, the rejection and defense mechanisms she had learned over the years would deny it.

‘What the hell do I want to do?’

Lucia thought there was only one path in front of her, but suddenly a new one appeared, and she was confused.

One was a stable path with no guarantees of happiness, and the other was a path to instant happiness, but the road to get there was so unclear and unstable.

“I… I don’t know.”

In the end, Lucia had no answer. Celine realized at once that she was uneasy.

She saw echoes of herself in Lucia’s face. 

“At first, when I told Bern to break up…….”

Lucia looked up at the sound of Celine’s voice.

“I thought it was the best thing to do.”

Celine blurted out her story.

“We loved each other so much, but it wasn’t easy, and there were so many obstacles in the way of our love, and I was so tired.”

She was tired of her family treating her like a mere cash cow, and Bern’s parents treating her like a commodity. 

It was all too much to bear for love alone.

“Maybe leaving Bern and marrying another man was my escape from reality because certainly once I got married, everything that was weighing me down was gone, and for the first time, I could breathe.”

But with the breathing room came the guilt and the longing for Bern.

“I felt like I was going to die again, but I finally realized, after half a year of marriage, that I was still in love with Bern.”

While she felt like she was dying every day because of her feelings for Bern, every time she heard that he was living like a wreck, she felt a little bit alive.

It was proof that Bern was missing her.

But when he told her he was getting engaged to Lucia, Celine felt like her world was falling apart.

“Do you know why I’m so desperate right now?”

After a moment of silence, Lucia shook her head.

“Because I realized that I couldn’t live without Bern.”

It was something she could say because she had already experienced a big break-up and ordeal once. Her true heart touched Lucia.

“Have you talked to …… Bern?” 

After a moment of silence, Lucia finally spoke. Her tone was calm, her words transparent. It was a good sign that Celine had gotten through to her.

“If you two were in love with each other, you could have talked to Bern, not me, and broken off this engagement.”

For a moment, Celine was pleased that Lucia had taken her words positively, but then she smiled bitterly.

Because what Lucia said was true. The engagement could be broken off at any time if Bern had the will to do so.

Which meant she didn’t have to try so hard to convince Lucia.

“Bern says he can’t make a selfish choice for himself.”

Lucia’s eyes widened at the unexpected answer. Lucia shudders.

“I don’t think I’m that important to Bern…….”

“That’s how much he cares about you. If I hadn’t gotten a divorce, he would have stayed engaged to you. He said he didn’t see you as a replacement for me.”

No, she hadn’t expected Bern to say that. No, she admired him for standing his ground when the woman he loved so much came back. Still.

“I think he should take more care of himself…….”

Lucia doesn’t know if she should call him nice or frustrating.

Hearing Lucia’s words, Celine laughed heartily.

“Frustrating, yes, but that’s Bern’s charm.”

Lucia could see the love on Celine’s face as she smiled softly.

It should have cooled off a bit after all these years since the academy, but her smile was a sign of young love.

Lucia smiled at the sight.

“… … I understand what the young lady is saying.”

Celine stared at Lucia, nervous again. 

Lucia’s answer brought tears to Celine’s eyes.