"You know, Virgo has been telling me that you don't come to see her much lately," Leo said to me as we sat beneath the water that crashed down on us. Today, the weight of the world is making the water crash down like boulders.
"I don't know if you have noticed, but I tend to get busy. Unlike the rest of you, someone has to keep the Mortal Realms in check," I growled to my brother, who turned to give me a look.
"You have been doing this since we were born, and only recently have you started spending more time in Yaggisdral. What are you doing there?" Leo asked me, and I looked away.
I already had talked to our father about this, but that had only left a sour taste in my mouth. It was more than likely that Kaedon had told Leo to talk to me.
"Do you not actually know?" I asked without turning back to him.
"Of course I do, but I figured if you explained yourself, I might be able to understand things a bit better. Father said you have become smitten with one of the humans you guard over," Leo said, and I let out a sigh.
"Sure, that is what happened. I, Ophiuchus, just decided that all the goddesses of the world were not enough for me!" I snapped, and Leo punched me in the shoulder hard enough to almost know me into the pool.
"If you act like an idiot, I am going to treat you like one," Leo warned, and I growled.
"Fine!" I snapped. My talk with my father pushed me to my limits.
"You have always loved your job as the protector, and you even get to go down and have fun with the mortals. I don't get why this one has you so hung up?" Leo asked, and I sighed.
"Tallia isn't just a mortal. She is just as much a person as you or I. Leo, I have been the sole protector of the lower realms. My job is something that I love to do, and I love the curiosities that I am able to enjoy, but this is different. I only ask that she is allowed to come to Yaggisdral. Why is that so much?!" I demanded.
"According to father, you can do this, but you can't see past the end of your nose," Leo said, and the water started to get heavier.
"Yeah, real easy. Just go and play the tool for the Guides for five hundred lifetimes! Really nothing in the grand scheme of things," I mocked.
"That sounds like something father would say," Leo chuckled, and I turned to him as the water bore down on me.
"He did say that!" I snapped, and Leo burst out laughing.
"Sounds about right, but then what is the problem then?" Leo asked.
"Do you know what I actually do?" I asked, trying to let my emotions calm, and Leo nodded.
"You protect the lower realms from Negative Energy or Nemoria, right? I mean, you have been doing this for a while. Not like everyone doesn't know," Leo said, but I shook my head.
"No, fur face, that is not the only thing! Each time I descend to the Mortal Realm, my memories are taken from me while I work. I am left with direct access to my knowledge and given instructions but the Guide, Helios, but I am always a brand new person down there. I know less about myself than the strangers that I meet!" I explained, and Leo frowned.
"That does seem troubling, but you have been doing it this entire time. What is the difference now?" Leo asked.
"If I do as father says, then I will have to live five hundred lifetimes, but with no memories of who I am, or who she is. Leo, I refuse to forget Tallia! She is the one that I have been waiting for! You have no idea what it is like to finally find what you have always been missing! You have Capricorn, and Virgo has Sagittarius, even if he likes to share her with me. The twelve of you have always been paired, and none of you have had to tread the mortal world! You only look through the looking glass!" I explained, feeling some of the weight of the water lessen.
The truth was before I had met Tallia, that was one of the only things that made the job bearable. Forgetting everything, good or bad, didn't matter. Without attachments, I had easily been able to move from life to life, defending the worlds from the ceaseless assaults of Nemoria.
This is until I met a woman that had such a profound effect on me, that not even seven new lifetimes could remove her. Tallia was now ingrained in my thoughts, and I had even started to miss her during my last life. Now, I refused to go back.
"Hmm. I see, and truthfully, we all knew that this time would come. You have always been the odd one out, and I have never really understood why. Maybe this is the reason after all, but I really think that you should reconsider father's words. Ophiuchus, you are the strongest of all of us, and you were specifically given this position. If this is what father is offering you, then I believe you should take it," Leo explained, and my heart started to rise again.
No one understood what I was going through, and they couldn't. This was something only I could understand; the rest could only assume what it was like.
"What if I told you that tomorrow, you would have to leave this world behind? What if I asked you to give up everything that you have ever been through with Capricorn?! Would you still have the same attitude, brother?" I asked, narrowing my eyes.
"Well, if I knew that-"
"You don't! You don't know anything or anyone! That is what it is like. You all probably talk about my incursions like it is all fun. Each of you thinks I am just going to have my way with women, but you all just have no idea what it is really like. Do you know why I am not allowed to keep my memories?" I asked after cutting Leo off.