Chapter 40 - 40: The Wager

I knew that I have won no matter what happens. The question remains, how far can I take the bet? I looked at Jiraiya and saw the disheartened face he was making. I couldn't help but grin. Tsunade must have taken my grin as me being overconfident and tried to up the ante.

Tsunade: Hmph, since you feel so confident, how about we wager all your funds?

Sage: And here I was, expecting something great from one of the legendary Sannin.

Jiraiya: Tsunade! Don't let him goad you!

Sage: (In a smug and trollish manner). Yes, listen to your comrade in arms. Maybe he can spare you from a humiliating defeat.

Tsunade was fuming. Her knuckles cracking could be heard from a distance. The heat from her anger caused heat waves to give the illusion of a Hannya (A Japanese demon) on her face.

Tsunade: Since you have that much to say then, how about you take over all my debt?

Jiraiya: Don't!!!

Sage: That is fine with me, however, at first, I was going to ask for a sloppy s.e.xy kiss from you but considering the years and amount of debt you have acc.u.mulated, I doubt that what I want from this wager will be enough for you to pay. That is, if you happen to lose.

Tsunade: HMPH!!! (She stomped on the ground) Even if it's my life, I will use it and definitely win this wager!

Sage: Shizune-san, do you agree with lady Tsunade?

Sage: Are you willing to add to her wager?

Shizune: Definitely!!

AH. The straw that broke the camels back. The euphoric feeling was divine. As if the Gods themselves stopped the world from spinning, had angels cradle my balls as they blessed my p.e.n.i.s. In contrast to this feeling however, the smile on my face was atrocious. My lips parted and I said what I wanted if I win. As if I have said the most heinous of blasphemes or when ones ears ring from a loud blast, everyone looked at me with flabbergasted faces. Seeing as they practically had a hard time hearing my terms, I repeated myself again.

Sage: 3 days. I want 3 days of my choosing that the 2 of you together with me will have some of the nastiest, sweatiest, smelliest, ball slappingest and animalistic feral voiced s.e.x. The days will constitute as 72 hours and no skimping on the time. Time and place will be at my beck and call.

Shizune & Tsunade: (Snapped out of it and yelled). KONOYARO!!!! (YOU BASTARD!!!!)

Sage: (In an eerily calm and gentlemanly voice). What's the problem ladies?

Tsunade: Do you have no shame?

Sage: And here I thought you would find it flattering that I asked for an impossible d.e.s.i.r.e of 2 gorgeous women for 3 heavy panting days. I thought me desiring you would mean much more to you, a wolf like me could only howl at my unobtainable moon. As for shame, you are asking me to take on your debt, which you yourself don't know the amount of. You are practically asking me to be a slave to pay that back. How am I in the wrong for asking for equivalence?

Shizune and Tsunade looked at each other as they understood where my logic was coming from. I made my last push.

Sage: (In a Devil's Advocate Al Pacino way of speaking). You are literally asking for my life, what are 3 days compared to that? Don't you think I am losing way more than the 2 of you?

Naruto was at a loss for words. Since it didn't concern him he could at least watch me fighting a Sannin. Jiraiya was changing colors from a ghastly pale white to a viridian green. Waiting for Tsunades' answer made him white, while thinking of me winning made him envious. I stretched my hand out as if to shake on it as I waited for her response.

Sage: Do we have a deal?

Tsunade: (Looked at Shizune for confirmation and nodded). We have a deal.

The smile on my face became joker sized, my laugh grotesque, my blood boiling and my eyes burning to win. I gave absolutely no room for chance.

Sage: Where do you want to face off?

Tsunade: I don't want to involve the city so a day away from here.

Sage: Any particular rules?

Tsunade: Taijutsu, Kenjutsu, Genjutsu and Ninjutsu, All is allowed.

I reeled in my crazy and saved it for the fight, no matter how one-sided it will be. I licked my lips like a hungry beast as we walked away to meet for tomorrow. Jiraiya went to talk some sense into Tsunade but it fell on deaf ears. Anger, embarrassment, determination and confusion was written all over her face. Shizune walked toward Tsunade while holding Tonton, her pet pig. I already got what I wanted so listening to their conversation made little difference to me. As I walked toward a hotel I could only plan of what we would do on our first night. Naruto walked with me hesitating to talk.

Sage: What is it?

Naruto: I know that you will win but why make a wager?

Sage: Lady Tsunade is a rare flower, but even a gorgeous flower has its' flaws. Hers happens to be gambling. I simply used it for my advantage.

Naruto: Aren't you only getting laid?

Sage: Yes but that's not all. Tsunade is known to have o.b.s.c.e.n.ely crazy physical strength. Of course I will win but I can also use her to train.

Naruto: Ohhhh. Ok, gotcha'

Naruto looked impressed with my plan but still questioned it at the same time. I don't blame him considering that Tsunade will use deadly drugs against me during the fight. We get a room and find a place to meditate. Naruto practiced his sage mode as the sage marks appeared on his face and I mentally practiced my techniques for when Tsuande loses.