124 Max's confession

Max turned off the shower and pulled a bathrobe around Liz before carrying her into the bed.

Liz's body was on fire, craving for Max's kisses and more (much more) touching.

Liz was in a daze. She wanted to feel his lips on hers, and her lips were left hanging when he started kissing and sucking on her neck, moving slowly lower.

A soft moan escaped Liz when Max took her nipple in his mouth. He sucked on it hard while his tongue danced around it, and he cupped her other breast with his hand.

Liz never felt anything like that. She loves that Max can invoke such a strong sensation which makes her whole body tremble, and at the same time, she hates him for making her lose herself, unable to resist succumbing under his skillful ministrations. She could describe the current feeling as: helpless.

Max kept his presence by focusing on Liz, careful not to make her uncomfortable because he knows that he is the first man to get this access. She is soft and firm in all the right places, and her flushed cheeks are making her several folds more attractive, and the noises she is trying to suppress are beyond amazing, and she is responding to his every move perfectly, and he feels the painful need to stab himself inside her, but… this is about Elizabeth.

Liz gasped when she felt his hand at the cradle of her thighs. What happened with the bottom part of her bikini? She didn't notice when it came off.

She let out a whimper mixed with a moan when his fingers moved between her wet folds.

It's not that she never touched herself before, but this… is too intense. Why does she feel that her orgasm is building up already? He just touched her, for crying out loud!

Liz fisted Max's hair and yanked his head higher, demanding a kiss.

Max covered her lips with his just in time to swallow her scream when her body trembled as she fell apart in his hand.

Five erratic breaths later, Liz pulled a pillow over her face. This is too embarrassing. What expressions did she make?

Max chuckled while trying to move the pillow away without using too much force.

\"Hey, let me see you.\", he demanded, and she could hear that he is smiling.

Liz imagined that smug smile on his face and she didn't want to see it.

She turned away from Max and curled into a ball with the pillow in its center.

\"I don't think that I will ever have the courage to look at you again.\", she spoke into the pillow.

\"Not fair…\", Max whined. \"Don't deny me this. You should see yourself. You are glowing… beautiful.\"

Liz turned slowly to face him and sure it is… there is that smile. But it was gentler than she imagined it and definitely not smug or mocking.

She glanced down at his erection. \"What about you?\"

Max shook his head. \"I am fine. Don't worry about it.\"

Liz realized that even though he is hard and ready, this is as far as they will go. She bit her lower lip nervously before asking: \"How many more steps until we go all the way?\"

Max arched his eyebrow questionably, and his smile morphed into his usual smug one. \"Impatient?\"

\"Curious.\", Liz clarified. Well, impatient also, but she will not say that at loud.

\"Many things can be skipped… except for one.\"

\"Which one?\"

Max inched closer and kissed her on the lips. He caressed her cheek and gazed deeply into her dark eyes while responding: \"I don't want us to just go all the way.\"

Confusion on Liz's face was apparent. \"What do you want?\"

An indescribable emotion stirred inside Max, reflecting in his deep blue eyes while he contemplated how much he should reveal. Few seconds later, Max decided: if he expects Liz to be open and not keep things from him, the only fair thing is for him to do the same. \"I want us to go beyond physical touch, I want us to make love.\"

Liz blinked. \"So… what is the missing step for us to… make love?\"

Max didn't look away from her dark eyes while telling himself that it's OK to confess how much he wants to possess her. Completely. \"Taking your body is not enough. I want all of you... I want you to love me.\"

Liz understood that he is saying how they can't make love if they are not in love. Makes sense, in some way… even though she does not understand the 'making love' itself.

Liz wondered, isn't 'making love' just a different name for a coitus? It's an act of two people (and maybe more) engaging into touching and penetration and stimulation which could lead to an orgasm. 'Making love' is what some people came up with while trying to romanticize coitus in an attempt to stretch it beyond the physical act, with an idea that the people should be gentle and in love and… Liz paused her contemplation and looked at Max curiously.

His words merged with her thoughts and came out as a question: \"If the missing thing is for me to love you… does that mean that you love me?\"

Max smiled and pulled her into a hug.

Liz took his action as a 'yes'.

Liz adjusted her posture so that she can rest her head on his shoulder and only when her palm landed on his firm chest she was reminded of the fact that the both of them are naked.

She reached for the thin cover, which was folded at the edge of the bed, and pulled it over them. Liz knows that no one will come and see them like that, but that cover made her more comfortable.

Liz took a deep breath and smiled. She was hoping for a topless snuggling, and this is much better than that. She did her best not to think where all Max touched her, because it is too embarrassing, no matter how good it felt at that time.

Liz took a mental note to think about the effect Max has on her. She enjoys his company, and she has fun with him, and he makes her happy and she craves for his kisses and his touch, but… is that love?

\"Max?\"

\"Hmm?\"

\"How do you know if you love someone?\"

Max sighed. He should have expected something like this. \"You never loved anyone?\"

\"I love my dad, and Mia and Bri… but I don't think that this is the type of love we are going for here.\"

Max hummed in agreement before asking: \"Not even a crush?\"

Liz wanted to ask if admiring someone's work and achievements (like Dr. Snow's) counts as a crush, but she decided not to mention that man. \"I don't think so.\"

\"And?\", Liz asked after some time. Max still didn't answer her question.

Max sighed. \"I know that you would like to have a definition, or something like bullet points that you can check off and track percentage of completion as you go… but that is not how love works. It is impossible to define it clearly because everyone has a different idea what love is. One person will think that loving means protecting the other one from the shadows and enjoying her happiness from the side, while someone else can't love without complete control and being at the center of the other's life.\"

Liz nodded in understanding. She read many books and her grasp on this topic is that love can manifest itself in many ways, but she does not care about some random people. This is about the two of them.

She rephrased her question: \"What is love for you?\"

Max chuckled, amused by her innocent curiosity. \"Honestly… I am not sure. Your presence in my life changed many things to the point of me not recognizing myself. Those changes and inconsistent behavior made me aware that you have the power to stir up my feelings.\" Max saw that Liz is not happy with his answer, and that he probably just deepened her confusion, so he tried to elaborate: \"I want your approval. I want to make you smile. I know that you are very capable and you can face the whole world on your own and come out victorious, but I still hope that you will think of me as a person who can share your burden… and help you.\"

Liz lowered her head and thought about his words. Is that love? Max didn't mention anything about touching and kissing and she will not deny how that is mostly what she is thinking about when he is on her mind. Or is that lust? Are those her feelings toward Max? Since when is she a lustful person? Ah, because of Max freaking Anderson she is lewd! Is it possible that it's contagious?

Liz took a deep breath to compose herself before continuing her thoughts. She is aware that Max is treating her nicely (almost) from the beginning. Initially, she assumed that his intentions are impure and that his only goal is to get under her skirt and add her to his list as a conquest thousand-and-something… Isn't that what every guy wants? But now he didn't mention anything related to that when he described his feelings. Did she think about him in the wrong way from the beginning?

Max touched Liz's chin and lifted her head so that he can see her expression. He just confessed his feelings and he anticipated several possible reactions, but none of them were how she will be this… dejected.

\"What are you thinking?\"

Liz hesitated for a second before answering: \"You are such a nice guy, and I am the lewd one.\"

Max's eyebrow twitched before he burst into a hearty laugh. He had to sit up in order to catch his breath.

\"What is funny?\", Liz pouted. Is he making fun of her?

\"Oh, Liz…\", Max wiped tears from the corners of his eyes. He does not remember the last time he laughed so much that he teared up. \"Other than my mom and Rina, you are probably the first girl to describe me as 'nice'.\"

His eyes scanned her exposed top with a lecherous gaze which proved his point.

Liz swiftly pulled the cover up, suddenly aware of her… nakedness.

Max's smug smile was on when he leaned over her. His kisses traveled from her jaw and down her neck and by the time he reached her collarbones, she didn't hold onto the cover at all and he removed it without any resistance.

Max spoke between kisses: \"Liz… I never felt this strongly about anyone… I want to touch you to the point of insanity… but I want it to be amazing for the both of us… that is why I will wait… for you to fall for me completely…\"

Max said something else about her depending on him and how she is amazing, but Liz was unable to focus. Her body was ablaze, and her mind was a mess while his fingers caressed skillfully the inside of her thigh and Liz was surprised when her legs spread apart on their own, welcoming his touch. Over and over again.

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