4 Yearn for more

This is not the first time that Ali had this nightmare, but this surely is the first time that she felt suffocated by the sudden burst of emotions.

It feels so real that Ali had a hard time telling that she was just dreaming.

Ali tried to force herself to calm down.

Even though her room temperature is so cold, she can feel that her body is full of sweat, her feet are numb and the rush of blood inside Ali's body feels like she is being steamed; it looks like there's some visible vapor coming out.

Ali could feel her blood boiling not from excitement but from the intense and tingling feeling from anxiety. She is shivering from the fact that this is the first time she felt horribly alarmed and afraid by the dream that felt so real.

Ali couldn't believe how real this dream was; it left her with a lingering fear to sleep because of how vivid it was.

Ali can't help but think if it is some omen or some kind of premonition of what will happen in the future. She has no desire to think about what will happen but it makes her feel uneasy that she could not stop thinking about it.

Ali unconsciously held her stomach and grips the clothes tightly. Her heart is beating so fast and pounding like crazy.

The thumping heartbeat is the only sound she can hear.

Then, a rush of pain suddenly struck her heart. Ali felt pressured and constricted by the sudden sharp pain.

"This…. this pain" she thought, she doesn't understand why. The crushing pain Ali felt intensified.

The burning sensation is squeezing out all of her resolve, its pushing her to the limits of her tolerance. Ali's eyes are now watery and she felt tired and drained.

Ali collapsed not because her body can't handle it but it's her heart that is out of control.

Her heavy breathing is the only noise in the silent room.

"Breathe, just breathe." Inhale, exhale slowly through her pursed lips. Ali repeated to herself.

Slowly inhaling and exhaling through her nostrils, she continued to breathe until she calmed herself. The slow, deep breathes helps her relax and reduce the feeling of uncertainty.

She rested her forehead on the pillow and took a few more deep breaths.

"I have to stay calm." Ali said again.

"I think I need a checkup." Ali thought to herself. After the accident two years ago, she felt fine after a few months and doesn't think she needs to have herself monitored. She felt trapped whenever she went to the hospital.

After Ali calmed down, she went to the kitchen to have a glass of water.

She sat on the couch, opened her laptop and started reading. This is to distract herself from further thinking.

As time flies, Ali had fallen back asleep.

Ali woke up early but got up late. When she opened her eyes, she just lay silently on the couch and stared on the ceiling.

"Why do I feel like I am heartbroken?" Ali asked herself confusedly.

The heavy feeling of sadness made her feel like running away and isolate herself from people.

"Maybe, I am still affected by that dream. Why can't I remember my other dreams? But this particular dream feels so vivid though it's not that bright. Hmmm, is it possible that it is telling me something?" Ali sighed and laughed at herself.

"How is that possible, I am not an oracle. Even I am doubting myself on what's on my mind. What's more, I find myself crazy just by thinking about this. This is hilarious. "

Ali headed to the kitchen to make herself a cup of a hot chocolate drink.

"Hmmm, better not think of it anymore. It's stupid thinking of something out of this world."

Ali pushed the dream at the back of her mind, thinking of not pursuing of it and makes herself more uncomfortable. However at the deepest part of her heart, the idea to chase the unknown makes her heart yearn for more.