Chapter 60 - No One To Blame

>>Esra

It must have been the alcohol that went straight to our heads and blinded our rational judgement. I couldn’t think of any other explanation for our actions.

Adam slept for two days straight after that night.

He wasn’t just drunk, he was mentally drained as well, maybe that’s why he slept so long. I could understand, whenever he goes back to his pack he has to deal with constant problems.

I was in the room when he came to but as soon as he woke up and saw me the color left his skin and he went pale.

He was beyond terrified and I had no idea why.

“Adam?” I stepped closer to him but he backed away, “What’s wrong?” His actions were suspicious.

“Esra…” His throat was dry so he gulped before speaking again, “You're pregnant.” He said and I was taken aback by his words.

“I’m not.” I told him and he shook his head.

“I can tell.” His gaze dropped, “A werewolf has the ability to tell that about the people who they are close with.” He gulped again, “I’m well familiar with your scent and it has now changed. I can smell another.”

His words came out of nowhere and I had no idea what to think about them.

“Pregnant? Me?” That was news and I had no idea what to think about it. This was beyond my thinking. Beyond my planning.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized and I looked back at him, “I’m so sorry.” He wasn’t even looking at me, he just kept his gaze down.

But this was a topic where I couldn’t even say it was okay. Because it wasn’t okay. I was pregnant and the father of my child had recently told me he planned to never meet me again.

I was at a loss. Moreover, he only kept apologizing to me.

It felt like he was even more lost than me.

“Go.” I told him, “Just leave.” I turned around, “You said you’d never come back anyway.” I began to walk out of the room, “I need an heir anyway. I’ll consider this a parting present.” I was blabbering complete shit. I wasn’t even processing it, every word I spoke didn’t go through my mind, it just came straight out of my mouth. But whatever I was saying was probably because I was hurt and had no idea what else to do.

“...” He didn’t say anything back.

I left the house and began to walk in the forest when he came running after me. He charged towards me at full speed and grabbed my wrist, “I’ll stay.” He said.

His words were so astounding to me I froze in my place and slowly turned to look back at him, “You’ll stay?”

“I’ll stay.”

“What about your pack?”

“...” He didn’t think it through.

“You said you were a hope to them? So will you leave them all alone now?” I never asked him for the details and he never told me any but still I knew things were bad there. No doubt I was very happy about him saying he will stay but considering how he was the past year he probably said it in the heat of the moment, “Go back.” If he wanted to really stay he would have never suggested to leave permanently.

“...” He was confused so I decided to use my authority on him.

I asked the forest to send him back to where he came from. Since I’ve been ruling the forest for centuries, it listens to me well.

Once I gave out my command through my minds, green thick vines that emerged from the darkest corners of the forest grabbed him and began to pull him away.

‘Ah!? Esra?” He was surprised at the sudden attack and I knew he would retaliate so I didn’t waste any time and asked the nearest Dryad to open the portal from where he was pushed to the human world.

I don’t know which part he was sent to since it wasn’t the same Dryad spirit that he has near his pack but he’ll be fine so it didn’t matter.

I sighed and looked down at my stomach.

Pregnant?

Just the next moment I regretted my actions and wanted him back but if he really wanted to stay, he’ll come back

***

Days passed and there was no sign of him. It turned into weeks and I realized I really was pregnant.

There was a small baby growing in my stomach.

A new life.

My very own child.

Arsay came back after a few days and I told her about it. It wasn’t like I could hide it anyway. She was happy for me but angry at the same time that Adam hadn’t come back. Quincelet had come to stay with her so he found out as well but he preferred staying away from the forest since his vampire genes were more dominant.

Time passed and the weeks flew by. I regretted my decision about throwing him out but then again I had no one to blame but myself.

One day when I woke up, a familiar presence immediately brought me to my senses and I sat up noticing how near it was.

“Adam!” I exclaimed in excitement.

“Hey.” He waved at me from across the room where he sat on the chair.

I stood up and hugged him, “I thought you wouldn’t come back.”

“I did too, you practically threw me out and it made me think you didn’t want me but-” He stood up, “I realized I loved you too much to stay away.”

I was beyond happy at his words and hugged him again, “What about the pack? Did you find any solution?”

“...”There was a long pause before his answer and I got a weird vibe from it so I looked up at him.

“Adam?”

“No.” He replied, “Not yet.”

“I see.” I noticed something different about him. He wasn’t his usual self, “So, this is the only time you came back without any visible injuries.” I made a light joke but he didn’t smile.

“Hmm.” His answer was mundane.

“Are you okay?” He nodded, “How long will you stay then?”

“I’ve been thinking.” He started, “How about I just stay here and never go back?”

I thought he was joking, “What are you talking about?’ I giggled, “You don’t care about your people?”

“...” He didn’t answer for a few moments, “Guess, I have to go back huh?”

“Well, I guess…” Is something wrong?

He got out of my embrace and walked to the terrace.

I was seriously worried about him but chose not to ask about it.

Just like that Adam started coming to the forest like he used to but there was a huge difference. He would try to act like his usual self but I noticed a lot of change.

He was constantly stressed about something and the days he spent with me would increase sometimes and at other times he wouldn’t show up at all.

As time passed I noticed there was something changing in him but I didn’t know what and I had no idea what to do about it.

“Esra?” He was laying on the ground at the end of the forest where the river began, “Sometimes I can’t understand why I fell for you?”

I was sitting right beside him, “Because I’m pretty?” I joked and he smiled. Nowadays he doesn’t laugh at all.

He sat up and put his ear on my stomach. I was due any day now and he often liked listening to the baby.

“Esra. I have some work at home.” He stood up and began to leave.

He seemed really out of it today and I was worried about him so I decided to secretly send one of the ravens with him.

I infused my magic in a black raven and told him to keep an eye on him.

Perhaps, that was the worst decision I made.

If I hadn’t made that, I might not have been filled with so much jealousy and hatred.