Chapter 89 - To My Goofball, My Moral Support, My Best Friend

>>Maya

It was the weekend and I felt so full of energy that I had to go and meet the two people today no matter what.

Afraid that this form of health might never come again, I decided to make use of the day and meet the important people and tell them things I need to.

I dressed up warmly and did some light makeup with a darker lip stick to appear good.

Firstly I was going to meet Ruda.

Yohan had already told him about me and since that day he’s been avoiding me. I had already left university so I couldn’t meet him daily like I used to and he wasn’t picking up my calls and barely replying to my texts. So the only thing I could do was catch him off guard and drag him to the cafe or something and make him listen.

That fool really is an idiot.

Like keeping his distance would solve anything. Things were already set in action and nothing could be changed now. Because I had already made a decision.

Since it was saturday I decided to sneak up on him in his dorm.

***

I knocked on his door like crazy just to annoy him.

“Who is it?” I heard his voice and took a breath of relief because I wasn’t sure if he’d be in his room. There was a possibility he might not have been here but I’m glad he was.

I’m glad I caught him this day.

I didn’t answer him and pounded on the door again, “Hey! I’m coming!” I heard him stomp his way to the door and open it in annoyance, “What is wrong-” He stopped the moment he saw me and tried shutting the door but I stopped it by placing my foot there. Forgetting how strong he was, I realized how foolish I was since my foot almost got smashed.

“Fuck!!” I screamed out loud and he opened the door in panic.

“Why the hell would you place it there!!” He got down to check my foot and that’s when I foot-slapped his face, “Ow!”

“Like that would hurt you.” I entered his room and he stood up.

“Is your foot fine?” He was still worried.

“It hurts a little but it’s okay.” I sat on his bed and then gestured for him to come and sit next to me with my hand, “Come on. We need to talk.”

He stood there by the door silently as he looked down, refusing to come over.

“Ruda.” I said his name softly, “Please…”

For the next few moments he didn’t say anything at all, then sighed, closed the door and came and sat by me on the bed. He was quiet, like he was forcing himself not to say anything.

“Ruda…” I started while he kept his gaze down, “I’m sorry.” I apologized but he didn’t say anything, “I’m sorry I kept this from you, I didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t want anyone to worry for an extended period of time and make them worry longer than needed.”

“...”

“I’m sorry, please talk to me.” I placed my hand on his shoulder, “Please,” I couldn’t see his face properly since he wouldn’t even look at me, “Are you that mad at me that you won’t even look my way?” I asked but got no response. I bit my lower lip, “I-Um, don’t have much time left…” These words shocked him and his body moved slightly but he didn’t raise his head. “I don’t want to go when we’re like this.” I got closer to him, “I want to leave knowing we’re on good terms.” I placed my hand on the other side of his cheek and turned his face towards me and paused for a moment.

His eyes were glossy and slightly red from the unshed tears he was trying to hold onto.

“Ruda…” I hugged him and he slowly and softly brought his arms around me.

He gulped, “I-I just can’t take it.” He was holding back his tears, “I just- I keep losing people.”Slowly, a tear made its way down his eye. He tried speaking but words got caught up in his throat and all that came out was a haggard breath, “I-I,” I pursed my lips tightly, “I don’t want to lose you too.”

I clenched my fists and tried my best not to get caught up in the moment. I didn’t want to cry and show him I was weak. I came here to do the opposite. I steeled my walls and broke the hug, “Ruda, it’s okay.” I smiled at him while he looked back with a weary and hurt expression.

“It’s not.” He shook his head as another tear fell down his face, “Your dying.” He whispered and then sniffled, “How can that be okay?” He wiped his tears away from his cheeks but there was no point, new one marked their place again, wetting his cheeks all over.

“It was either your brother or me.” I smiled, “Which one would you rather have stay?”

“Both.” He gulped and then breathed another raddled sigh, “I have only you two left. The closest people to me.” Never in my whole life had I ever seen Ruda so weak, so vulnerable. I guess all the bad things were happening right after one another. Losing his father, his mother, suddenly getting so much responsibility and then finding out he was going to lose his closest friend too. I know he was in pain, a lot of pain, “Maya…” He called my name very softly, “There has to be a way…” His voice cracked as he spoke, “You're my best friend.” He sniffled again as he wiped away his wet cheeks and then sniffled again.

I maintained my smile, “Ruda.” I placed my hands on either side of his cheeks and made him look directly at me, “I chose this.”

“Why?” His nose was slightly red too and it made me smile genuinely. I now know that when he cries his nose gets a bit red.

“Because I didn’t want Yohan to die. Do you?”

He shook his head with his eyebrows furrowed, “Never.”

“Right?” I then joined my head with his. It was a cold day but the sun was out. Ruda had left his window open to let fresh air in and so the gentle breeze came in, fluttering the curtains softly. “I didn’t want that either. So I chose this.” I gave him the warmest smile I could conjure, “Because I love him that much.”

He looked at me for a few moments, wondering and pondering on my words, then he brought his hands up and placed them over mine. I got a feeling he finally gave in and accepted my decision.

“You’re the best friend a person could ask for.” He said.

“Likewise.” I giggled, “I loved how other girls got jealous of me when we weren’t even a thing.”

My words made him finally smile and his tears stopped.

“I knew you secretly loved that even though you denied it.” He sniffled and then snickered. I could see his sharp canines as he flashes a smile.

“Ruda?”

“Hmm?”

“The time I spent with you was-” I held back my tears with all of my strength, “-Amazing.” He smiled, “You were my moral support, my goofball.” I giggled and he flashed me a smile, “You're my best friend and always will be.”

His smile faded and there was silence for a few seconds, then he spoke,“I’ll miss you.” He whispered.

We both moved apart.

“You better.” I pinched his cheek.

“Ow.”

“Like that would hurt you.” I pinched it harder then let go.

“Ow!”

“I’m glad I got to meet you Ruda.” I told him.

“And I’m glad I got to meet you.”

We both looked at each other and shared one final smile.

Goodbye my goofball, my moral support, my best friend.