140 Academy Antics Part Eight – Lunchtime

Unlike the course description, there was no practice after the writing and learning part of Basic Spellwork Composition. I whispered a question and Vanessa whispered back that we wouldn't get to practical work until we had the basics learned. I apologized for that, because I had a very difficult time with casting the wrong way. Vanessa gave me a wide eyed look at my description, then the bell rang.

I packed up my damaged book and writing things into my bag, thanked her, and left to go to lunch. I had to meet Selena for that and I wasn't sure where I was supposed to do that. I went to the administration building that took care of things like that, the same place I was assigned living quarters, and discovered that the cafeteria was on the second floor. The place was huge, which was great, because the students were everywhere.

Clusters of them were all over. Some stood, some sat, some talked, some ate, and most of them were in the midst of various combinations of those. It seemed like more of a social gathering than a meal. I supposed that I was too used to the mess hall in the army, because this seemed like a completely inefficient way to feed so many people in such a short amount of time. I would find out later that lunch ran for three hours to feed everyone and my lunch time was in the last hour.

A uniformed man stood at the entryway and held a hand out to me. “Card please.”

I took out the card that the second man in the administration room had given me.

The uniformed man huffed in derision. “You are only allowed to eat to the food on the Bronze tables.” He said and pointed to the last two tables along the side of the wall. “They are the dregs that have been moved down from the Silver and Gold tables.”

I turned to look and what he said was true. As I watched, one of the cooks picked up a practically empty dish that looked like some kind of dessert from a Silver table and unceremoniously dropped it onto the first Bronze table. Those two tables had the most food dishes and were quite packed, since the other tables fed down onto it. The problem was, it was the last remains of the food that everyone else had already eaten.

“If you attempt to eat the food from other tables, you'll be barred for a day, even if someone else offers you the food.” The uniformed man said, as if he was reading my mind about how to get around the restriction. “If you are caught doing it twice, you are barred for three days.”

“What happens if I do it three times?” I asked, since that was the natural progression.

“Unfortunately, the punishment resets after that. Apparently, making someone go without food for three days is the limit to the punishment we are allowed to assign.”

“From personal experience, someone can live for up to a week without food, as long as they have access to water.” I told him and he looked shocked. “It doesn't have to be clean water.”

“David! There you are!” Selena said from the tables across the room as some of the people around her shifted to the side and gave her a view of the door. “Grab some food and come over here.”

I walked over to the closest Bronze table and it was actually worse than I thought it was going to be. It was pretty much the table where the cooks stored the dirty dishes, because almost nothing was left inside of them. If I scraped the insides of the heating pots, I was sure I'd get a scoop or two of potatoes and if I used my fingers liberally, I could scrape out some gravy for them. It would be a bit scummy, because it had been left on the heat too long with nothing in the pot.

I gave up on trying to find something I could eat when the second table wasn't any better than the first, and walked over to Selena. The look on her face was a mixture of horror and pity.

“I'm going to kill father.” Selena finally said, her face changed to anger. “No one is supposed to eat from the Bronze tables!”

Becca had a hand over her mouth and she looked sick.

I took out a general health potion. “Take a sip.”

Becca did so and sighed in relief. “Thank you.”

“What was that?” One of the others asked as I tucked it away.

“It's a general health potion.” I said. “Selena, you haven't spoken to Helena yet?”

“I was busy preparing for school and haven't had a chance to visit.” Selena said, sadly. “I still can't believe she cut father off like that.”

“I've never heard of it before.” Becca said. “Who cuts off ties to the main family and then ensures they have an heir?”

“How did he react?” I asked, because I knew Helena wouldn't.

“He wrecked the parlour.” Selena said. “Mage Fire and Wind Storm.”

“By the Son's Light.” One of the girls whispered. “Was the room enchanted?”

“Yes, thankfully.” Selena said. “The whole house could have burned down if the fire suppression hadn't activated and doused everything in water.”

“What enchantment is that?” I asked, almost eagerly. “It can produce water? Is it magical? Does it come from a prepared water source or is it generated from the ambient magic in the area?”

All of the girls leaned back slightly at my barrage of questions, even Selena.

“You'll learn all about it in the second year of the enchanting course, Bronzie.” A girl at the next table said. “Oh, look! They just put a half eaten pie onto the table. Hurry up and get it before someone else takes it on you!”

“Cheri, they dropped it on the floor.” The girl next to her said.

“I know! He should enjoy the extra grit.” Cheri said. “Won't you, Bronzie?”

“Go ahead, Bronzie.” A guy from the next table said. “I wanna see you eat it! Ha ha!”

“Bronzie! Bronzie! Bronzie!” The other guys started to chant and then the whole cafeteria of people joined in.

“David, don't.” Selena said. “They just want to humiliate you.”

“I know.” I said. “You might not want to watch this part.”

Selena opened her mouth to speak and Becca touched her arm with a shake of her head.

I nodded to her and walked over to the Bronze tables.

“Do it, Bronzie! Do it! Do it! Do it!” They all chanted.

I picked up the pie plate that they all wanted me to eat. It smelled good, and I moved it up to my mouth and they chanted more. “Hold on, why just the pie? You want to see me eat more, right?”

“YEAH!” They yelled.

“You asked for it.” I said and picked the cleanest pot. It happened to be the one with the creamed potatoes in it. I dumped the pie into it and a few people cheered. I picked up the next dish and motioned to the one with the pie, and they encouraged me to go for it.

I picked up one of the large serving spoons and scraped out the yellow custard. It had partially separated and I plopped it into the pot. I picked up the next small pot, the gravy I had seen earlier, and used the same spoon to scrape it out. I added it and then picked up the next and the next. I tossed in crusty bread rolls, the last few tough pieces of roasts, and a few things that I couldn't identify.

I had the pot half filled and no one was cheering anymore. I used the large serving spoon and I stirred everything up, making sure it was all mixed together, and picked up a spoonful of it. They all had wide eyes and I turned the spoon over. The mixture slowly slid off and made a splat sound as it fell back into the pot. I picked up the pot and walked over to Selena's table.

“No!” Selena gasped and held a hand out to me.

I nodded and walked over to a table no one was using and I dug the spoon into the pot and put several servings onto one of the plates there. The entire place was completely quiet as I sat down and used the proper utensils and started to eat. Three people threw up as soon as the spoon touched my lips. Fifteen covered their mouths as I chewed. Another twenty had to turn away as I swallowed.

“S-s-stop.” A voice whispered.

I turned my head and looked to see Vanessa beside one of the Silver tables. I nodded to her and took another spoonful, then another and another. When I finished what was on my plate, there was a collective sigh from nearly everyone. I assumed they all thought I was done, so I showed them that I wasn't. I grabbed the serving spoon from the pot and put more of the horrible looking food mixture onto my plate.

“Oh, god!” Several girls exclaimed and ran from the room. I ignored them and continued to eat.

I was halfway through my third helping when the mage in charge of giving out the cards for food came in. He looked shocked, probably because he hadn't believed whomever told him about what I was doing.

He walked over to me and I couldn't tell what the expression on his face was. “You're making a scene.”

“I am only eating.” I said and took another spoonful and chewed. He seemed to wince each time my teeth came together.

“It's making everyone else uncomfortable.” He said.

“That's not my fault. They asked me to do this.” I said and took another spoonful.

“You should... limit yourself... to only one or two dishes.” The man said, clearly uncomfortable with telling me to only eat the dregs of a couple of dishes and not all of them. “Compatible dishes.”

“It's all going to mix together in my stomach anyway.” I said and a few more people threw up.

The man looked angry. “I am ordering you, as the head of the culinary department, to limit yourself to two main dishes that must be complimentary and one dessert dish to be eaten after the main dishes! If you do not, it will be the same as eating from the high class tables and you will be punished accordingly.”

“This isn't punishment enough?” I asked and took another spoonful.

“STOP EATING THAT!” The man yelled and tried to swat my hand with the spoon. I let the spoon go, caught his hand with mine, and caught the spoon with my other hand in barely a second.

“Assault me again and I'll remove your hand.” I said and squeezed it.

“ARGH!” The mage yelled and dropped to his knees. “L-l-let go! Let go!”

“I know the rules here. You dared to touch a student in anger. I am fully within my rights to demand punishment from you.”

The man's anger was quickly replaced with fear and he kept trying to pull his hand away.

I let his hand go and he jerked backwards with a yelp. “You put me here in this situation.” I said and kept eating until my plate was empty. “Imagine, the head of the culinary department giving me garbage to eat on purpose.” I said and stood up. “How good do you feel about your prestigious department, now that you've seen what I'm eating?”

The man stared at me with shock on his face.

“I'll follow your demands, even though they are unnecessary.” I said and he didn't respond, so I turned to the room. “I wasn't going to subject all of these lovely ladies to seeing me eat like this every day.” I said and saw them all relax. “Please, accept my apologies for my actions. I deeply regret that you had to witness that.”

I waited a moment to make sure they were all looking at me, then I gave them a regal bow. More than a few of them gasped in response. I straightened up and picked up the nearly empty pot and walked over to the last Bronze table. I put the pot on it and walked out of the room.

The uniformed man guarding the door kept his eyes forward and didn't look at me at all as I left.