77 Troubled Zoran

That was terrible! What the... He must have read it wrong! That had to be it.

He read through the letter his father sent him once more, hoping he would prove his first read wrong.

<My son, blablabla, you are weak of heart... no spine... not worthy of our house... disappointed in your progress... toughen you up by having you serve in the army... either royal or imperial doesn't matter... I hope it will help you man up, your service will begin once you are released from the school. PS; your sister says hi.>

That was a catastrophe. Him in the army? That wasn't a place for him at all! He'd die for sure!

Zoran needed to find a way out fast!

He stood from his desk and started pacing in between the delicate draperies of his window and his bed. He racked his brain to find an answer, gripping and messing his own hair in an attempt to think harder.

He couldn't think of anything! He couldn't help but see himself in a row of soldiers in front of a bunch of creatures. He wanted to cry.

Could he perhaps escape by loosing a limb? It sounded way too painful though, he'd never be able to do it. What was the point of being the son of a duke if you had to go fight monsters like everyone else! Why was it so wrong to enjoy pastries and flowers? His tastes and the way he chose to entertain himself didn't change the fact that he was an actual man. A short and week one, true, but a man none the less.

Sometimes, rarely, he wished he had been born a girl. If he was a girl instead, he wouldn't have to worry about big fights. He wouldn't have to go swing swords and no one would bother to question what he liked to do in his spare time.

One time, he wondered if he could put a dress on to convince his father he had no place in a war but then felt he would only make him extremely mad. Even though his sister assured him he'd look good in a dress, his plan to stop his father for good might have ended in a way worse catastrophe instead so he forgot that idea immediately.

But what could he do then? Maybe someone else would have a good idea.

He left his bedroom and stepped into his main room. There, his two servants were waiting for him.

They were both taller than him by a good two heads and wore the short green dresses Zoran had given them. The two acted like caring big sisters with him and he liked it very much. They would wrap their soft arms around him and bury him into their breasts to hug him. Every time, he would turn red from the sensation and they would giggle at his embarrassment.

What he would not tell them was that he had especially asked for their clothes to be made in order to show a lot of cleavage. He wasn't shameless enough to actually do anything with those two but he had never once regretted his investment while he felt their skin on his cheeks.

Today though, he did not have the time to let them cuddle him. He told them he'd be back later in the afternoon and asked them to prepare him a bath in the meantime.

He left his place and walked down the corridors of the school thinking about who he should ask for a way to dodge his predicament. Maybe it would be best to just ask everyone, he'd make a round asking each of them and he'd try the best answers.

His first step would be the magic class, It was the perfect time to ask things because the teacher didn't bother to discipline them at all. He just let them do whatever they wanted. This made it the perfect place to talk. He was halfway there when he finally realized that he had forgot his book of spells. He was so turned around by the letter he really forgot about everything else. He cursed himself and went back to his room with a fast walk.

He was interrupted on his way back by something unexpected. Nearing a "T" corner, he heard some inconspicuous noises. His heart started to race, was it what he thought it was? He slowed down and sneaked up to the very corner of the stone wall. Crouching down and placing his hands against the ground, he peeked after the turn with his head close to the floor.

He was right! There was a guy and a girl kissing, noisily, and obviously lovingly. The boy was a student, he wasn't in his group but Zoran recognized him as one of the guy who made the mistake of fighting against Emp.

The very short girl was most likely a slave since she was a cursed-blood. She had a long skinny tail swishing left and right from under the hem of her long dress and fluffy mouse ears sprouting through her luxurious hair.

The guy was leaning over her and kissing her passionately. Holding her head and lips against his own. How scandalous! Even though Zoran didn't have a strong feeling of hate or disgust against cursed-bloods, there was no way he would ever kiss one. Even if she was the prettiest girl ever, he would not. The one in front of his eyes was not the prettiest girl though, that tittle belonged to only one and she wasn't it.

Zoran was shocked, and very embarrassed to be witnessing this. He couldn't help but keep watching. Would they ever stop? Would they get caught by someone, would he get caught peeping? Josseline would never believe him when he'd tell her later. They were so busy with each other that they didn't spare any attention to the end of the corridor where he hid.

The mouse girl freed herself from the guy's embrace by just a fingers length in order to get some air. She looked feverish and love struck, her nose seemed to twitch by itself when the guy would get his face close to hers.

"My father is definitely insane." He said as she was gasping for air.

"Master..."

He kissed her again.

"I really can't understand his choice."

"What if someone comes here?"

"I don't care anymore."

"But I don't want you to get in trouble because of me. The girl your father loved must have been the same. Please, I wouldn't forgive myself if you were shunned because of me."

He caressed the nape of her neck tenderly and spoke to her in a serious tone.

"My father was wrong, I can't do the same, I'd never be able to do it."

"But I'm glad of the choice he made or you'd never have been born. What would have happened to me then?"

"I guess so but... I really love you."

She hugged his arm tightly and her tail rose to entwine itself with his fingers.

"I know, I love you even more. To be with you is the greatest joy in my life. That's why, please..."

He gave up with a heavy sigh and placed a light kiss on top of her long ear, making it twitch.

"I get it already. Let's go."

Hearing that, Zoran's clouded mind cleared as if he had been struck by lightning and he hastily backed away on all four in the corridor. If they came this way and saw him now it would be really bad! He backed all the way to a pillar and quickly hid behind it.

He was still holding his breath and hoped that his heavily beating heart wasn't as loud as he felt it was. He heard the couple take the other branch of the T intersection and felt so very relieved they didn't come this way.

Once he couldn't hear their steps anymore, he whipped the sweat from his forehead with an handkerchief and scurried back to his room with the fastest speed he could muster. It was only once he closed the door to his own room and leaned his back on it that he started to breath properly again. His two slaves looked curiously at his heavy breathing self and quickly moved to either side of him to bury him in their bosom.

"What happened to you? You look so nervous, let us calm you, there there."

He really liked that kind of treatment but that wasn't what he needed right now, it was only making it worse! All that breast flesh in his face wasn't calming down his heart at all! He pushed them both away in a fluster.

"I-I-I-'m fi,fine. Noth-nothing happ-p-p-pened. I just forgot my-my book. That's a-all."

There was no way he'd ever admit that he got in this state just by looking at two person kissing.

"Oh, silly us, we forgot you had classes today. Should one of us carry those books for you?"

"They're way too heavy for our cute master."

It was true that the magic book were heavy and it was also true that they usually carried them for him. It was a bit embarrassing but it couldn't be helped.

"Th-then Uksa, p-please help me."

She clapped twice and ran off to get his books while the other one, Nasa smiled warmly.

"Then this means that I get to hold your hand on the way." She said, beaming.

He wanted to tell her no because that was embarrassing but he couldn't resist that sort of smile. That was how he ended up walking to the magic class holding hands with one of his slaves again. Hopefully no one would see.

He parted with Nasa at the door of the class and brought Uksa in to place the books at his desk. Almost everyone was there already. At least, forgetting his books didn't make him late. He sat down and took the remaining time before the class to calm himself for good and bring back his head to what he wanted to do. That kissing story could be dealt with later, right now, he needed to find a way to save himself.

...

He was really itching to tell Joss and George and about it though...

Since Ivar was sat close to him, he'd ask him first and then join up with the other two to tell them what he saw. Yeah, that seemed like a good plan, that way he'd do both.

He leaned over his desk towards Ivar and asked the older boy if he had a good idea. Ivar was almost ten years older than him, surely he would know a trick.

"Ivar, my da-dad wants me to join th-the army but I-I don't want t-t-to. Do you know a way to-to make him change his mind?"

Ivar shot him a look of pity and whispered in a sigh.

"You too?"

Zoran was confused by his answer.

"What do you mean me t-t-too? Who else?"

"Me, I was told I'd have to join whether I liked it or not."

"Really? My dad th-thinks that I-I'm not manly enough so he decided th-the army would t-t-toughen me up but what about y-you? You're not like me at all."

"It's just a family tradition I don't want to follow. It's dangerous and a waste of time so I don't want to go."

"Th-then how do we get out?"

Ivar just shook his head in defeat.

"If you find a way, let me know. For now, the only thing I could do was waste as much time as possible here in the school to put off the execution."

That was a really depressing answer. If Ivar couldn't find a way out, despite all the time he spent looking, did that mean that there was none? Zoran worried there would be no correct answer.

"Th-thanks, I'll continue to search."

Ivar waved him good luck and threw his attention back into his book.

Zoran turned to the other side and switched place with Uksa to fool the teacher into thinking he was still studying. Instead of actually doing that however, he walked up to George's desk and met with Josseline who similarly ditched her studies.

"Why do you two always use my desk as a meetup point? Can't you go somewhere else for once?"

"No way, you're the perfect midway point between our desks." Josseline denied him with a fake face of indignation.

Zoran only answered with a nervous smile. George complained almost every time they convened here but he knew deep down that he didn't really want them to go away, he just put up a surface show of rejecting them. In truth, George was a good friend.

He complained of everything and anything and grumbled every time anyone asked anything of him but Zoran felt that George only pretended to not want to be here. He never said a thing if not to complain but he showed up every time something happened anyway.

He would sit on a remote bench to assist to the duel between their group and the other, he would pretend to sleep but perk his ears to listen to the strange stories and misadventures of the others, he was always there somewhere, listening. He just hid in the back were no one would talk to him. Zoran felt he really preferred to watch over the group like someone in a crowd assisting to a theater performance rather than be in the group of performers himself.

He was similar to Zoran in that no one paid them any attention, Zoran because he had no presence and George because he pushed everyone away and pretended to not care.

He felt bad that George might end up without friends because of his strange habits so he made a point of often talking with him. His desk wasn't a perfect midway at all, it was just a pretext to forcibly include him. Everyone seemed satisfied with that arrangement.

The three of them were really a group of unexpected friends, he thought. There was the stuttering doormat who no one paid any attention too, the guy who pretended to dislike it all but peeped at everything and the girl that liked to snoop at everyone's secrets by pretending to be looking for a husband. With the three of them combined, they knew almost all the secrets of the school and the students alike.

However, even though they knew so much, they didn't intend to do anything with all that information. It was all just for their own fun, they liked to discover all the secrets and repeat them when they felt like it. For example, they knew that Gytha disappeared awfully often to meet some secret lover, they knew that Penny spent all her evenings with Heinrich, they knew Rica was no noble at all and also the true names of most of their classmates.

The three pf them suspected that Rica was the reason why they were allowed to hide their names this time around. The simple girl of a woodcutter getting married to the future duke of thorns was big news after all.

Aside from that, they even knew that Nessa often met with Emp and Brenia to train furtively despite everyone else thinking she had a lover she met in secret.

Now, they also knew that Jin, the man who supposedly hated all cursed-bloods was in fact in love with one of them. Like he had thought, the story of what he saw earlier was highly entertaining for Josseline.

"Now way, he really said that? That's incredible! I wish I had such a good lover too." She said dreamily.

"You're always ru-ru-ru-ru... fluttering around everyone. Who's the real target?"

"Still not sure, I can't choose so hastily after all. Norval is promising but he's still young and a duke is too high for me after all so maybe Kenneth, Oliver, Emp or one of you two."

"Don't just add us two on the list. Don't include us in your mind games." George complained.

"Those aren't mind games though."

"What about Cyril and Nicolas?"

Zoran believed that the two of them were much more knightly than the others, even more than Norval the honor student. If only they were a bit stronger, they would get many love confession from servants and students alike.

"Nha, Heida put a claim on Nicolas since day one and I don't want her as either a rival or a sister. Cyril is a really good person but I feel he's the type that will forget about his wives and think only of his work and duty. I want a husband not an empty space everyone tell me is great."

Maybe she was right. Zoran hadn't considered that. Still, she agreed with him that knightly types were more charming. With how small and weak he was, would he ever get confessed to by a girl? He'd probably get killed in some battle long before it ever happened.

Zoran slumped down on George's desk.

"Why are you so depressed suddenly?" Josseline asked with a questioning frown.

Now was as good a time as any to tell them so he explained to them the terrible situation he was now in.

"You're screwed, better accept it." George flatly told him.

"What, no way, don't give up like that! I'm sure we can find some way out."

"Do you have any idea?" Asked Zoran, hopeful.

"Not yet... But I'm sure we can find something."

He groaned pitifully.

"Maybe if you're incompetent enough, even the army will throw you out." George proposed.

It may seem like a dumb idea but it was the best he had obtained until now.

"I don't think that's a realistic way to go about it. How about you ask Emp instead."

Emp wasn't here right now though. He had a strategy lesson instead. From what the trio had heard, he had almost mastered it already. It had only taken him less than a year. If Zoran disliked the mere idea of joining the army, Emp seemed to be the opposite and already started taking steps to get high in its structure. Of all the students in their class, he might be the one with the most knowledge about this sort of things.

"I should do th-that but he's not here now. Who else should I ask in the meantime?"

Looking at everyone present, there weren't much that could be of use to answer his question. Oran wasn't exactly known for his good ideas, Nicolas was known to be unable to escape his situation and most of the others weren't there because of the strange schedules.

"Maybe Juniper or Aglaya might have an idea. The two of them are really smart after all."

He nodded in agreement, either might just have some insight on how to disentangle himself from this. He chose to go ask Aglaya first. The reason behind his decision was that Vanessa wasn't here, she was in the strategy class with Emp.

There was no way he'd ever be able to say a single word if she was here. He'd end up embarrassing himself like in the dance class, he still cursed himself everyday for that blunder. It was so frustrating! The one time he could have impressed her he had wasted it all again! He had made the prettiest girl he had ever met fall with his clumsiness.

Other girls like Juniper and Josseline might have more curves and more womanly charm but in Zoran's opinion, Vanessa was by far the most breathtaking of the girls in class. Tall, slender, elegant and graceful, with delicate features and smooth skin he had to force himself to not stare at. Just a touch from her hand was enough to stop his heart from beating and his brain to function.

He was infatuated with her, there was no denying it. He'd do almost anything if it meant she'd give him a kiss on the cheek. Just Being in the same room as her was suffocating.

He often wondered what sort of guy she liked. What would he have to do to impress her? Both him and Josseline tried to pull the information out of her but both failed, she seemed to have no other interest than dance, drinks and the safety of the northern territory.

For the dance he had failed miserably. He did not understand why when he practiced alone in his bedroom he was so proficient at it but when he tried to do the same in front of others, everything went wrong. He had no hopes of impressing her that way.

Then, there were drinks. If it was tea, he was fine. Except for the fact that he shook and spilled some the last time she looked his way while he was drinking some, he was confident in his tea related knowledge since he liked all kinds of them. Alcohol however was something else entirely. Nessa could drink more than five others without being affected at all where as a single mug could knock him out for hours. That was a dead end too.

Then, there was the protection of her territory. She wanted to inherit it and protect it dearly, she needed strong and smart men to fight with her and defend the border from the cursed-bloods and whatever else might come from the tribe lands. This was an absolute failure for him, there was no need to even explain. He was a weak scaredy cat and his father was right, he was spineless, an unreliable coward. Who would want such a weak guy to stand with them and lead a large territory. Speaking honestly, he had no value and that was quite depressing. What's more, if he did end up with her, she may have to move south to him rather than the other way around, she would never accept such a thing.

There were only two realistic way for him to end up with her. One, if he failed to escape the army and somehow became an impressive knight she could rely upon. That seemed more absurd than anything. Second, if she failed to inherit the rights to her territory and ended up forced to marry by her father. Maybe at that point he'd be able to convince everyone involved that he was the best choice. Not only did this seem just as far-fetched, he felt miserable just for thinking she might fail. He wanted her to succeed after all.

Because of all that and the fact he knew how weak his chances were, he was simply way too embarrassed to talk around her. He'd rather fall down the stairs of the school's many towers than stutter something nonsensical in front of her.

With her absent, it was way less difficult to talk to Aglaya. Like usual, she was with Mable. Even for the trio of rumor collectors, Mable true identity was a mystery.

He heard that Mable was an upstart noble Aglaya took a liking to and carried everywhere with her. He also heard the opposite, Aglaya was a bodyguard sent to escort Mable who was a high noble.

Zoran believed both to be wrong, Mable was most likely the daughter of a count or a viscount in close relation to count Pierail. They were obviously childhood friends and their relation had nothing to do with being subordinates of one another.

"Hi Ag-g-g-glaya, Mable."

"Hi Zoran. Is something the matter?"

"Yes, you see..."

Zoran told her everything about his predicament. Aglaya nodded while Mable said "Poor you." In an apologetic way.

"And so you want me to help somehow?"

"Yes, I was th-th-thinking you might have an idea to help me get-t-t out."

Aglaya thought about it for a long while making Zoran somewhat nervous. Finally, she spoke with an unsure tone.

"I'm not sure how effective it would be but if you secured a wife with a high standing before then, he might think the link with another powerful house to be more valuable than making you more manly."

Zoran felt defeated. How would he ever do that! Not only was this highly unlikely but he would also need to succeed in his first hunt before he tried anything and he wasn't confident at all in his chances of success.

He was really glad now that Vanessa wasn't here because he was certain he would have turned towards her the moment Aglaya suggested marrying a high noble. That would have been almost as horrible as making her fall.

"Sorry that I wasn't that helpful, I never imagined that sort of problem before."

"Maybe you could just pretend to be really awesome for a while and your father might change his mind. Find some monster parts to send him and just say it was you who killed it." Proposed Mable in a lively way.

"That won't do, just a quick look at his card will reveal the ruse and he'll end up in even more trouble." Aglaya reasoned.

Both Mable and him slumped their shoulders in defeat. Zoran thanked them for their time and walked up to juniper instead.

Once again, he had to repeat his whole story. She listened seriously to his words and nodded in understanding when she got the gist of it.

"It's hard to come up with an answer for you since I don't know your father at all. What I do know is that negotiations are all about offering something of value in exchange for what you want. If you want him to change his mind, you have to offer him something that is of equal or higher value to him than the results he expects."

That was a reasonable tip from the merchant but what did his father want? He said he wanted Zoran to man up but the truth wasn't exactly it. What he truly wanted was for the other nobles to stop mocking him for his weak son. Zoran was a weakness. He wasn't his only son but from the eyes of rival houses, the meek boy was a huge target.

Maybe his father didn't mind if he died in some battlefield, at least he'd be able to claim he died a soldier death and the rest would have to shut up.

In that case, he needed to prove to a bunch of hostile old men that he wasn't someone they should laugh at and disdain. That was impossible! However much he thought about this, his father was right, to have him become a soldier was the only way to pull the rug from under their feet.

The alternative was to follow Aglaya's first idea which would end up doing a similar thing but it really wasn't an option. Was he really going to be stuck in a line of soldier?

He thanked her for her suggestion despite feeling worse than ever and went back to his desk to sulk.

After the class, he went to find Emp, his last hope. He wasn't hard to find because he would come back to Mable right away after each of his lessons apart from her.

Emp was a strange guy. He was very strong and grew at a ridiculous rate but he had no common sense and sometimes acted in a weird way. If he acted in a more noble way, he felt that he would suddenly be way more popular than Cyril, Norval and Nicolas.

For now, he was the kind of guy his father wanted him to be. Strong and helpful, with a way to stand that said it was best not to mess with him. Although once you really knew him, you quickly learned that there wasn't much that could really bother him. Zoran had never heard of him getting angry at anything.

His two friends and him tried to figure out his last name many times but in the end, couldn't do it. Most people thought he wasn't a noble at all and came here by his own mean but the three of them knew better. It was confirmed that he was a high noble but they had never pinpointed his exact origin.

Their best bet up to now was that he was a Muracier but it felt way to unreal to match that guy with such a big name. Instead, it was more likely considering his ties with the old duke that he came from a long line of military man in service of the Muraciers and so shared the upright attitude and battle fanaticism.

He found him in a corridor and called out to him with a wave of his hand. His clothes seemed small for him, he obviously had them lengthened many times already but Zoran and the others could tell he needed some new ones, they didn't fit him at all anymore.

The cursed-blood servant was still on his shoulders. The others had been right after all, since he was used to see her there, it was easy to forget her presence. She did act a bit like an oversized accessory and she took notes for him too... He wondered if he did like Jin in private.

He reddened a bit at the thought. Why did he always think of weird things when he saw him. Now, because he thought of that, he remembered how embarrassed he felt about being carried by him like some princess. This happened every time he saw him, he felt so much shame he wanted to bury himself underneath the school. He had wanted to be helpful but instead, Zoran just felt immeasurable shame and then some guilt for rejecting his goodwill like that.

"S-so-sorry." He blurted out.

Emp frowned hearing his apology. What was even more embarrassing was that he apologized so often for it that his classmate knew exactly what he was talking about even though that was the only thing he said.

"Would it make you feel better if I let you carry me in the classroom in front of everyone once?"

Obviously not! It would make it way worse instead! That guy really was a shameless weirdo to propose such a thing! What would everyone else think? He really made quite the pair with the carefree girl, both of them were full of nonsense no one else would think about.

He ignored his proposition as best he could.

"No I-I-I-I need your he-help."

Zoran fought his stutters and explained to him what his problem was.

"Why is getting in the army no good?" Emp asked with a face saying he didn't get it at all.

"I-I'm not like you, I'm no good with this sort of th-things. It's too much for me, I'll d-die." He complained to make him understand.

"Oh, Manley told me something similar before. Would it not be a good thing though? Not dying obviously but you could use the army to get your first kill more easily, no need to go on a dangerous hunt. There's a lot of citizens who do that."

It made some sense because in the middle of so many soldiers, any sort of fight would seem easier but in reality, surviving a battle from the front-line was way harder than just going on a hunt. There was no way he would do that!

"P-please help!" He insisted.

"Hmmm. I don't know how to convince your father to not send you in the army but I know a way to make you spend your time there safely If you fail to convince him. Would that help?"

Emp said it with an unsure tone and a shrug but such a thing sounded great to Zoran's ears.

"T-t-tell me!"

"I don't know for the royal army but in the imperial army, they would never waste a talent on the front line. If you can show them you are valuable in some field, they'll put you somewhere more appropriate for you. Archery is a good place for example because the other soldiers will stand in between you and the enemy."

That sounded like a good advice but archery was a no go. He wasn't good at it at all. He was one of the worse in the group for it. Ivar used to comfort him by saying that at least he was better than Emp but that wasn't even the case anymore. That was another thing he had been defeated in by Emp. That and his height, he had not been that much taller than him when they first met, why didn't he stop growing already! Zoran was getting a bit afraid he might steal Vanessa from him.

"Aside from archery, what else is there?"

"Mages are valued a lot too. Healers are one of the most important and they get to stay far in the back. You had an affinity with light magic right? I can't remember who told me that."

That was probably Odilon, he had pressured him until he revealed his affinity. That was harassment after all! He was forced to say it!

"Light affinity has a great deal of spells associated with healing and support no? If you can progress in light magic study enough before you get in the army, they'll give you a healer's spot and you'll be sent in the very back close to the commanders."

Zoran thought about his words for a few seconds and decided it was the best advice he received until now. Learning light magic in just a few years couldn't be that hard could it? There was hope after all! He now deeply regretted wasting most of his magic classes talking to Josseline and George instead of studying seriously.

That was one of the rare things he had been good at after all, he placed no efforts at all in it and just spent his time there leisurely instead. He needed to roll up his sleeves and spend all his efforts in that now if he wanted to escape the worst.

"Th-thank you Emp. You helped me a lot."

***

"I could retire with a pretty wife but I could do so much better still. There is an easy way to fix your problems and let us live in bliss for the rest of our lives. We only have to choose you some worthwhile sisters."

"Sisters? As in..."

"Yes, we only have to convince a few to join us, we would get more than enough money to be well off, we still have my many talents in case something happens and you would get many a lovely sister you already get along well with."

"I'd love to be sister with my friends."

"I knew you'd like the idea. Have no fear, you'll always be the greatest in my heart. With all the information you provided me, It will be easy for us now to choose who would make a better sister and how to... Convince them."