54 A place I never thought I'd go 2

Her lack of sleep put aside, she was exhausted not only physically because of all the struggles she had to face in New York and Boston, but also psychologically because of all the negative thoughts that she couldn't totally repress.

Although Lazar seemed much less affected by fatigue than her and that she could admit that he was currently stronger than she was mentally, she couldn't believe that he was in full possession of his abilities after all the events of the day.

Not to mention the previous days which must have been more difficult for him than her because of his injury and the loss of his adoptive mother.

Anyway, the ambush, his evolution, that was enough for today, they both had to go to sleep now, "Don't act like a moron, it doesn't suit you. Whatever you have in mind, that can wait until tomorrow." She told him to make him come to his senses.

Before saying this, she had remembered the moment she thought she would rely on Lazar to make all the important choices. Once again she was breaking the rule she had set for herself but once again she couldn't help it.

The first time it happened was yesterday when she made the impulsive decision to fight with the Alpha, but this time, it was different. She was going against Lazar for a reason that she found even more selfish than the previous one.

The problem for her wasn't that she was asking him to give up what he had in mind, deep down she knew it was the right thing to do. The problem was the reason why she was asking him to do it; she was afraid for him.

Not only afraid that his death would ruin her projects as before, even if there was still some of that, but sincerely fearing for his sake.

Admittedly, until recently, although she had some affection for Lazar, she had seen him as a tool to serve her interests above all else.

'When did it change?' She wondered anxiously, 'I can't get attached to him, I must only think of her...'

Looking back, the answer to this question seemed quite clear.

She had felt it more distinctly than Lazar when it had happened but this phenomenon was so unnatural that she didn't really knew what to think about it when it happened.

Right after Lazar got his class, a bond had formed between her and him, when she saw the bonus of statistics that the system had given her, she thought it was just that, but now she finally understood that it was a much deeper bond than that.

At first, she felt anger towards the Horsemen thinking that this bond was used to manipulate her feelings so that she and Lazar would get along more easily, but upon closer reflection she realized that her feelings weren't false or forced and that the bond was of a different nature.

When Lazar walked into the meeting room earlier, she not only noticed his disgust when he saw Andrew, she felt it as well. When he was trying to contain his anger, she had felt it too.

Each time it was a barely tangible sensation, but now Amandla was convinced that it was real.

As for why she hadn't made the connection between these feelings and Lazar, it was simple, she had become so accustomed to experiencing these same feelings over the past 2 years that she had unconsciously mistaken them for beeing hers.

If one of the goals of the Horsemen was to make it easier for her and Lazar to understand each other by creating this bond, then it was successful, at least for her part.

If another one of those goals was to make her feel closer to Lazar, then there too they had succeeded, she had already given up treating him as a tool, 'I can't.'

'Don't act like a moron, it doesn't suit you.' It was the second time Amandla said this to him, remembering this sentence brought a gentle smile to Lazar's face for no particular reason.

"The limits of my body are constantly being pushed back lately, but that doesn't mean that I am no longer aware of the existence of these limits. I know what I'm capable of and I haven't set myself an objective that I consider unattainable." Lazar calmly explained to Amandla to reassure her that he wasn't planning to go on a suicide mission.

A little more soothed but still rather dubious, Amandla wanted a clear explanation of what he wanted to do to find out if she was right to worry, "And what exactly is that objective?" She questioned him.

"Take advantage of the night to sneak into the MIT, do a little scouting and kill one of the monsters there to find out who we're dealing with before coming back tomorrow." The way he had presented it, Lazar saw that as a formality, or at least he wanted Amandla to think he saw that as a formality.

But clearly it didn"t work, "You've got to be kidding me, I will not let you do that."

"I think I missed the part where you had the right to stop me from going out." Lazar told her with annoyance, if Amandla began to contest his decisions, then their relationship would quickly deteriorate.

"I got the ability to see in the dark when I obtained my class, it gives me an advantage that I need to exploit." Lazar continued to argue, thinking that she would give up when he revealed the trump card he had up his sleeve.

But seeing that she remained silent and that her face still expressed her disagreement, Lazar thought he understood what was really the problem and wasn't sure how he should take it, "I, too, hate it when people try to protect me."