Chapter 166 - "You Shouldn't Be Here, Ji Fan"

It was midnight when Tian Yuan woke up.

Opening his eyes he looked around the room he was inside and found out that he was still in the hospital.

He was alone.

He tried to remember whatever happened last when he was conscious and concluded that he must have collapsed because of the panic attack.

It was not the first time actually.

Six years ago, when he lost his father and then when his mother went into coma it was then he started to have panic attacks.

However, it has been very long since his last panic attack.

Perhaps it was four years ago, Tian Yuan tried to remember…because until then all of his savings had started to vanish on his mother's hospital fees. He had started to understand that he needed to become strong to manage everything 

And he became very strong.

Slowly and slowly, he started to learn how to put a mask of indifference on your face to hide your emotions. It was also a definition of becoming strong in Tian Yuan's eyes.

However, all his hard work went away in vain when he met the person he had never wished to meet again.   

Yes, Liu Ji Fan was not even the last person on this earth Tian Yuan had wanted to see. He had made his heart understand forcefully every time he missed Liu Ji Fan.

Still, his heart was very disobedient. Because when he met Liu Ji Fan, Tian Yuan forgot all his anger and resentment.   

How could he have done that? Tian Yuan questioned suddenly himself.

How could he forget everything so carelessly? How could he still love the man who was the reason behind his destruction?

How would he forgive himself?

The question filled Tian Yuan's heart with guilt, fear, and bitterness.

He got down from the bed and came out of the room.

Looking around the empty floor with lost eyes, he suddenly found the room Liu Ji Fan had taken him inside.

Tian Yuan walked towards that room like a lost child.

He opened the door and went inside. There was a chair placed beside the bed and Tian Yuan occupied it. Since the moment he entered the room, his eyes never left the woman sleeping on the hospital bed.

His hands trembled as he moved them forward to hold her mother's hand.

Tian Yuan remembered the last time he had held those hands.

'Don't touch me …go away. I and your father…we gave you so much love, Xiao Yuan...so much…but you … became the reason of the death of your father... the man I have loved for my whole life…you killed him. I would have never birthed you if I… had… known… this before.'

And then his mother had collapsed on the floor after saying these words.

Tear after tear fell out of Tian Yuan's eyes and his hold on his mother's hand became more firm.

After that, he never dared to hold those hands.

Today his mother didn't push him away but Tian Yuan didn't feel happy at all. He would rather have her push him away.

But the woman on the bed didn't move at all. 

"Mom…I miss … you so much."

Tian Yuan whispered and cried

"Do you still hate me? I will not show you my face but …can you please wake up once?"

Tain Yuan murmured between his sobs. 

He suddenly leaned down and hid his face in his mother's palm as he continued to cry. Tian Yuan didn't know for how long he cried.

It was only when he felt a pair of arms hugging his shoulders and patting his head gently, he raised his head.

A kiss fell on his forehead as soon as he looked at the man in front of his eyes.

It was Liu Ji Fan.

Tian Yuan didn't know when he entered the room and dragged a chair to sit beside him.   

His eyes were blank as he felt Liu Ji Fan embracing him to his chest and murmuring sweet words in his ears.

He didn't say anything and Liu Ji fan also stopped murmuring after some time.

"Why didn't you come to me after uncle's sudden…"

Liu Ji Fan stopped before he could say death as he felt the body inside his arms becoming completely stilled.

"Ssshhh…It's okay, I am here now."

He caressed Tian Yuan's back gently and whispered in his ear. Tears again surfaced through his eyes as Liu Ji Fan wondered what all Tian Yuan had gone through all these past years.

He had become so thin…so thin that he could feel his bones now.

Did he even take care of himself?

For all those years when Tian Yuan was absent in his life, he was very angry at him…for leaving him like this.

'What if he had not hired a man to investigate Tian Yuan?' 

The stupid man would not have told him anything. Liu Ji Fan was very sure about this.

He remembered the things his man told him just half an hour ago.

Uncle Tian was in some other city when he got into an accident and died just a few hours after. After that, Tian Yuan left the city to look for his father in the other city with his mother.

After that, Mother Tian collapsed at Father Tian's funeral and went into coma and Tian Yuan never came back to his own city again.

Liu Ji Fan suddenly found something amiss between all this.

But what was it…

His thoughts came to halt when Liu Ji Fan felt Tian Yuan suddenly pushing him away from himself. 

A frown marred his forehead and he tried to pull the man back in his arms. However, Tian Yuan put his hands on his chest stopping his actions with firm eyes.

The look in Tian Yuan's eyes suddenly scared him very much. As Liu Ji fan suppressed the fear inside his heart, he heard Tian Yuan saying. 

"That's the thing.. You should not be here, Ji Fan."