37 Chapter 36.

When I entered the supposed pocket realm what laid before my eyes on the other side somewhat shocked me to death.

What is the meaning of this?

I couldn't help but look at my wife with a questioning look on my face.

She just smiled back at me like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Seeing I wouldn't get anywhere without voicing my concerns I asked, "little wife, what is the meaning of this?"

"Meaning of what?"

"This house."

"Don't play dumb husband, you should know better than I do."

"I definitely know best what this house is, but why is it here?"

"Why wouldn't it be here?"

"This is a pocket realm, isn't it?"

"..."

"It is, isn't it?! Why so silent? Why are you averting your gaze?!"

"Husband, there are some things you are better off not asking."

"No no no. There is no way I can not ask. What is my families house doing in some ancient tablet that should contain a pocket realm?!"

"Husband, this is your final warning. If you probe any further into the mysteries of the world, your little wife will be forced to reluctantly dish out divine punishment."

Hearing her words I was slightly scared inside, but there are times when a man needs to stand his ground. This was naturally one of those times. It was not that I was secretly excited by the thought of the punishment. It definitely was not that! I'm a manly man, I'm not afraid of some punishment from a woman who happens to be my wife! My eyes are definitely not showing an expectant look in them like the reflection of my face in my wife's soul stealing eyes.

"Little wife, I'm not scared of any punishment. There are some things more important than fearing punishment."

"Admit it, you want to be bullied."

"I do not!"

"Really? That look on your face seems to say otherwise though."

"My eyes sparkling is just because of the nostalgia of seeing my home after a month. That is all my wife, there is no deeper meaning to my expression."

Even I felt my words were rather unconvincing, but there was nothing I could do about that.

"Husband, are you just going to stand there and not introduce your little wife to her father and mother-in-law?

Was this her true goal? Was this whole trial by fire just an excuse to meet my family? Were you to shy to bring it up directly?

"Little wife, the real reason behind this trial by fire, is it actually…"

"Husband enough pointless chatter, I want to be introduced already."

Yep, she's fickle when it comes to her true feelings. That look of excitement is giving you away little wife. There is no way you are just acting excited right now, right?

Seeing her look that was hurrying me into action, I could only reluctantly drop the matter and head over to my front door and knock. I lost my keys after I died after all. What do I tell them when they ask where they are? Tell them, "I died. Tehe." Then knock myself on the head with one hand while tilting my head sideways?

It sounds stupid, but maybe it would work. Like hell im doing that! I'd be a moron to think that would work! What else can I really say though? That was when it hit me like a speeding truck-kun.

For some reason I felt like there was a very deep reason for this feeling, but maybe I will never know.

It was the best, most reasonable excuse I could have possibly thought of. I might actually be an idiot for not thinking of it sooner.

After coming up with the best excuse I could think of, I walked over to the door confidentially whereupon I lifted my hand.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

…

Is nobody home?

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Is anyone there?"

Still no response. Are they really out right now? It was supposed to be a touching reunion with my family though.

I turned back to my wife with a troubled look and said, "it looks like my family's not home."

There was no disappointment on my wife's face and she calmly said, "don't worry they're home, it looks like there's someone in the toilet and someone in the kitchen listening to music."

Oh. That explains why. One can't answer while the other can't hear. My mother is probably the one using the toilet while my sister is listening to music while getting a snack. Father's probably still out working.

I guess I'll need to be loud enough to get my mother out of the toilet. Surely she will rush out when she hears her son is back after so long.

KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK.

"Mother get out of the toilet! Your son is back after being away for a month!"

I shouted as loudly as I could for the whole neighbourhood to hear.

Pattapattapattapattapatta.

After a few seconds I heard helter-skelter panicky footsteps from behind the door. It looked like mother was truly moved by her son's sudden return.

I opened my arms wide waiting for our touching reunion when the door suddenly slammed open and I was greeted by a taekwondo kick to the face.

That was truly a beautiful kick little sister. I can even see your black panties that are slightly wet. Did you not wipe properly? You realize you're wearing a skirt, right? Is this how you greet your brother you haven't seen in so long.

"Who's your mommy? Huh?! Huh?! Do I look old enough to have an idiotic twenty seven year old virgin son who doesn't know delicacy?! Little brother, why are you back anyways? If you were going on a journey to find yourself and do some soul searching you should have just never come home!"

Ah this feels really nostalgic after all. Such a touching reunion between siblings. I felt a strange sense of warmth hearing my sisters kind, heartfelt words as her stocking covered foot was grinding against my face. Damn it! I wish I could say I felt a warm sensation in my heart! Isn't that how things are supposed to go when family reunited? Why is it instead feeling the warm sensation of my sister's foot in my face when we finally reunite after being apart for a month?! Where is my tear jerking reunion?! Is this a scam? Are you really my sister? Are we really blood related? Was I actually adopted?

I awkwardly looked at my wife while my sister didn't move her foot even for a moment like it was the most natural position in the world. It seems she felt my face was a rather comfortable foot rest. Fudge you, who's a foot rest?! Your mother's a foot rest! Ah, never mind, sorry she's not.

I noticed when I looked at my wife she had a look of confusion and doubt on her face when she faced my sister. It was like she thought there was something really bizarre or unbelievable about my big sister.

She then looked back at me and asked, "are you really blood related siblings? Are you sure you weren't adopted?"

Even you are doubting it as well?

"She really doesn't look a thing like you after all. How should I say it? Isn't she too gorgeous and sexy to be your big sister?"

I felt betrayed. Even my wife thinks I'm adopted too? I could only sadly ask, "big sister will you please move your foot from my face?"

"Why?"

"Can't you see we have a guest?"

My sister finally looked over calmly towards my wife and then back towards me without a single change in her uncaring expression before she responded, "so? What does it matter if we have a guest? You're enjoying my foot in your face anyways, aren't you?"

"No no no my beautiful caring big sister. As beautiful as you may be, big sister, no man likes having a foot pressed against their face in front of another person."

"There are a lot of people who pay good money for that kind of service though, my foolish little brother. You should be thanking your big sister for allowing you to experience this strange hidden pleasure that other men can only dream of experiencing."

"I can see your panties though."

"And? My little brother seeing my panties isn't a big deal is it? We've grown up together and have even seen each other naked."

"Big sister it's hard to say why, but I really think you should put your foot down. For your sake and mine."

"I don't want to, I'm stretching right now."

"Big sister, please don't use your little brother's face as a foot holder to stretch your legs."

"Little brother, I'm waiting for that hard to say reason. So, what is it?"

"You didn't wipe completely."

Finally my sister calmly lowered her leg before she narrowed her eyes and glared at me momentarily before returning to her calm indifference. She probably thought, it's just my little brother, so who cares.

She then called out excitedly with a cutesy expression, "mommy! Little brothers back!" At least, she did in my mind anyways. Reality was much crueler than in my imagination.

She instead calmly called out in a flat monotone voice with uncaring eyes, "mom, brothers back. It looks like he's hired some girl to act like his girlfriend again."

"Big sister isn't that quite cruel after you haven't seen your little brother in over a month? Also, I wouldn't hire someone! And get it right, can you not see that ring on her finger? She's my wife!"

"Mom, brothers back, it looks like he's hired some girl to act like his wife again."

"She's not hired! She really is my wife!"

Why can my big sister not even show the slightest bit of respect or care for me when I'm in front of my wife?! Is she jealous that her little brother is now taken? Does she actually secretly have a little brother complex?

"Mom, brother seems to have lost his mind from being single for too long. Should I call a psychiatrist again?"

Nope! Who am I kidding? She's just spiteful that I'm saying I'm married before her! It is a landmine for her after all. Being pretty and sexy, but men are too cowardly to make a move on her. She even went through a point in life where she was a lesbian. At some point she couldn't deny she really liked men when confronted by her various female companions, so she stopped dating women altogether once she realized she was only hurting them.

"Little sister shouldn't this be a touching reunion after a month apart?"

"Shouldn't this be where you leap in and passionately embrace your little brother in tears, thus creating a heart jerking reunion between two loving siblings?"

"Mom, big brother is being creepy. Should I call the police?"

"Big sister! Please give your little brother a break! Don't call them again!"

It looks like my wife caught on quick as she repeated, "again? You're a repeat offender?"

Beep. Beep. Beep. Ring. Ring. Ring.

I quickly snatched the phone out of my big sister's hand and hung up. Cold sweat broke out behind my back and it flowed like a waterfall.

"My wife, my big sister just likes to joke."

"So you really have hired women to act like your girlfriend or wife before?"

"That's what you were questioning?!"

"Naturally."

I wanted to cry, she didn't question the part about the police, but rather the part about hiring women to act as my girlfriend or wife? Why was your question so delayed anyways?! Does she really believe I would do that?

I couldn't stop myself from looking in the mirror towards the end of the hallway at the entrance to my home. Do I look that pathetic? Last time I checked I was dashingly handsome, so much so that I was able to win my wife's heart at first glance. But is that really the case?

"My wife, I am handsome, right?"

"Mmmm?"

What's with the troubled look on your face? What does that even mean?!