Chapter 189 - The Reason

His voice was steady as he said, "Sit down." Except that it was the only thing that was steady with him. Since the day he knocked on his daughter's door, he has been experiencing anxiety.

He knew it's not going to be easy to reach out and ironed out the issues between him and his first child. Her first daughter out of seven that he sired. He poured some water on their glasses and waited for Jess to sit down. 

When she sat down, he put down the pitcher of water and took his own seat. "Let's eat." 

"Do you know what time it is?" 

He glanced and met his daughter's blank face. She used to always have an easy smile on her beautiful face, that looked too much like her mother - his first love. 

He looked at his wristwatch, "It's three thirty-four." 

"Yes, it's three thirty-four. Not really the time to eat these," she swept her eyes on the feast in front of them. 

"I don't know what else to do to make you sit down and talk to me. Food is something that could make us sit down and not kill each other." 

She sighed and picked her fork and spoon. She started putting food on her plate. Her father prepared most of her favorite food. 

Seeing the mountain of her favorite food on her plate, Jess felt like crying. 

"I'm sorry." 

"I'm sorry too." 

Sebastian winced when his daughter apologized. He suddenly had a premonition that something bad was about to happen. Jess doesn't just say sorry. Screaming and breaking things was her usual response. 

He watched her start eating. "How was it?" 

"It's good. But when I came home you weren't here. Where did you get all this food?" 

"A friend opened a restaurant and had heard that I am here visiting you, he had this food delivered for us." 

He put some rice on his plate and when Jess didn't say anything more, he added, "I was probably at the lobby picking up all of these when you came home," he said, trying not to cut the flow of their strained conversation. 

"Wouldn't it be easier for you to have your delivery sent right outside your door than having everything go through the concierge, where you'll pick them personally?" 

"I do things for a reason. Don't complain about it since you aren't going to be here for a long time anyway." 

He heard the bitterness and the accusation of her words - 'Not going to be here for long.' 

He should have listened to her better. Preferably, when she was still young and she still needed a father in her life. Now that she has her own life, Jess no longer needs him to live her life. 

"Yes, I will leave soon," he picked up his glass of water with his trembling hand. "But, this time, I want a place in your life. Whether you like it or not." 

She just scoffed and continued eating. 

"The twins will have their 6th birthday at the end of the month." 

"And what do you want me to do? Go home for their birthday party?" she scoffed. 

"No. But a call would be nice. I mean, with all of your sisters, the twins didn't see you as much." 

"Maybe it has something to do with the fact that their mother is the same age as me?" she said, putting down her spoon and picking up her glass. "That you had ---" she took a deep breath, "...got that woman pregnant when she was nineteen?" 

He has no answer to that. It was the truth. The woman he is living with now is the same age as Jess, where he has two young twin daughters. 

Jess has a friendly relationship with all of her half-siblings, except for the twins. She hasn't seen the twins in person since they were born. Jess left home when he got the mother of the twins pregnant. 

That was the last straw for Jess. His own daughter thought he reached the lowest of low with his casanova lifestyle when he got a nineteen-year-old girl pregnant. 

He can't blame Jess. What happened was a terrible mistake, but he can't just walk away from that mistake since there were two kids involved. He wasn't trying to win the best father award, but he was trying to be a good father. 

He can't be a good partner anyway. No woman filled the void that Jess' mother left in his heart. But, Jess won't believe that, since he also left Jess and her mother in the past. 

"They wanted to see you," he said, clearing his throat. 

"And I also wanted to break all of these plates in front of me, but that doesn't mean I should do it, right?" 

He took a deep sigh and gave his daughter a small smile, "You shouldn't." 

She looked down at the unfinished food on her plate, glanced up at her father, "I just lost my appetite." 

"No standing up from the table with unfinished food on your plate." 

Jess gritted her teeth, she got trapped by food. 

She sighed and picked up her fork and continued eating. But this time, she would push the food around her plate before putting it in her mouth. 

"Years had already passed. You don't have to forgive me, but can you at least meet your sisters?" He raised his hand in the air when he saw Jess curled her lips, suppressing her annoyance. "Maybe later...but sooner would be better." 

"I'm tired of being part of your life with your women. I'm tired of investing emotions in people that would just disappear in my life, just because you can keep your shit together." 

She slammed her spoon down, next to her plate. "It's so freaking tiring watching people walk out of our lives just because you can't deal with whatever bullshit that you are going through. So, I'm not going to be part of it anymore. I refused to be part of it." 

'Ah, so this is the real reason why Jess chose to leave.' He thought, staring at her daughter's furious eyes.