Chapter 1 - My Costar Can't Be Him

Yao Shen is having a terrible day.

It starts with the reality tv show he was going to star in, "Innocent Youth", being cancelled.

"What do you mean it has been cancelled?" he asks into his phone, holding it out while in speakerphone, so that his assistant Bi Jialu can listen in too.

"Ahhh, Yao-laoshi, the tv show is called "Innocent Youth" but on account of the scandals surrounding four of the seven cast members, that name is somehow unfitting." On the other end of the line, Boss Hong sighs despondently. "People have been making all kinds of jokes and memes on weibo for the past week. How can production go on like this?"

What the fuck does that have to do with him?

"I'm not involved in any scandals! Just find new people to go on the show and replace the other guys," Yao Shen says, while his assistant pats his knee comfortingly.

The problem for Yao Shen is that he isn't involved in much of anything.

Ever since his debut in the entertainment industry four years ago, things have been terribly lackluster. A support role here, a second male lead in an unpopular drama there, but nothing that he can really sink his teeth into.

Four years of grueling work and sleepless nights, and Yao Shen is virtually anonymous.

This reality tv show was supposed to be his big break!

A feel-good show where D-list celebrities go on a series of dates with random, but attractive, anonymous people until finally finding "the one". The gimmick was that they were all inexperienced in love and that their focus on making their careers take off made them unable to date -- until the tv show came along.

Of course that if one of the cast members has been secretly married the entire time, the other has been found in the company of high end prostitutes, yet another one has a bitter foreign ex who is more famous than him, and whose fans google translate Twitter callouts into Chinese, complaining about what a two-timing bastard he is, and post them on weibo -- the "innocent" part is bound to be a hard sell.

And just like that, due to no fault of his own, Yao Shen's big break goes up in smoke.

He groans and thumps his head against the car seat.

If he doesn't find a paying gig soon, he's going to have to leave the entertainment industry.

His agency, HuaHua management has no confidence in him. He and his assistant are taking a didi to his first photoshoot in months, because they can't be bothered to waste one of their private cars on him.

"What am I going to do now, Boss Huang?" he asks, his eyes meeting Bi Jialu's downcast gaze over the phone.

They hear Boss Huang's crackling sigh from the other side, "There's one thing," he starts, "but I don't want you to get too excited, it's a long shot."

Yao Shen rolls his eyes -- his career is a long shot at this point.

"Have you heard of the webnovel 'Shizun, this disciple will have to kill you?'" Boss Huang asks.

Bi Jialu's eyes grow comically wide. "It's one of the most popular danmei novels of all time! They're turning it into a live action drama."

Yao Shen grumbles, "Who hasn't heard about it?"

It's the hottest ticket in the industry right now, and everyone who is anyone has been auditioning for a role. It's such a massive production that even being cast as Fruit Vendor #3 is bound to get some actors more exposure than a leading role in a smaller drama.

Of course, Yao Shen hasn't managed to land an audition for Dead Body #21, he would never have such lofty aspirations as Fruit Vendor #3.

Unless..."Have they opened casting calls for the secondary roles yet?" he asks, barely able to contain his excitement.

"No, they're still looking for one of the Male Leads, they only have one right now."

Bi Jialu covers her squeal of excitement with both hands, jumping up and down in the backseat, to their driver's annoyance.

Yao Shen doesn't dare speak it out loud, "Then..."

"I got you an audition for the role of Yan Shuyi."

---

Two days later, Yao Shen goes for the audition accompanied by Bi Jialu.

The audition for Yan Shuyi will go on for several days, as hundreds of actors are being considered for the role. It's being hosted in a nondescript conference room in a swanky Beijing hotel. A huge waiting area outside the audition room is already crawling with expectant actors and their respective teams by the time they arrive.

In sharp contrast to his more famous peers, Yan Shuyi with only Bi Jialu as "staff" sticks out like a sore thumb.

He knows he isn't bad looking. It were his looks that got him the contract with Hua Hua in the first place. His first ever agent praised his innocent peach blossom eyes, and how they always looked humid and on the verge of tears -- Yao Shen didn't have the heart to tell her that was due to recurring spring allergies.

The second praised his lips, and how they were always the color of ripe cherries even without any product, the upper lip arching subtly over the pillow of his pouting bottom one. The redness was the result of Yao Shen anxiously chewing on them, but he thought it best not to comment on that.

He had four agents in the four years since his debut, and they all praised him on something. His silky hair, his fine skin, his straight eyebrows, his long fingers and longer legs -- but no amount of praise got him roles.

And eventually the compliments would die down, as would his agents' excitement over the new artist assigned to them.

Yao Shen is certain they're not going to pick a nobody like him for a project this big. No investor in their right mind would let the production company cast a no-name actor in such a big role.

A lot of people expect to make bank with this drama.

Yan Shuyi's love interest has already been cast, and while there hasn't been an official announcement, he's rumored to be a big name in the industry.

"Maybe I should just leave," Yao Shen says to Bi Jialu, wiping his sweaty palms on his pant legs. "There's no way they'll pick me."

Bi Jialu glares at him. "Yao laoshi, that's just fear talking. Laoshi is a great actor, and this role actually plays to his strengths." She pats his arm. "My gut tells me this is going to work out."

He refrains from telling her that might just be indigestion.

Time passes and Yao Shen's nerves only mount, as actor after actor leaves the audition room looking pale, sad, or just plain scared.

Which is confusing to say the least.

He catches the tail end of a conversation just as one of them talks with his team members. "...so fierce and demanding. He criticized me from start to finish."

Oh no, that's not good.

A casting assistant comes out the casting room right after the last actor leaves, reading off her clipboard she says, "Yao Shen," she looks around until Yao Shen meets her eyes and then nods. "Come with me."

With one last panicked look towards Bi Jialu, Yao Shen follows the casting assistant into the audition room.

It's no different than all the other casting rooms he's been in; mostly empty with a makeshift stage in the middle, a camera on a tripod facing it, and some stage lighting.

Behind a long table sit five tired looking people, the casting director, the drama director and the screenwriter, most likely. Although Yao Shen can't tell who is whom.

The biggest difference is the lone figure standing in the corner, looking out the window at the busy streets, one hand carelessly shoved into the back pocket of his slim fit black joggers.

Yao Shen would recognize that elegant profile anywhere.

The long crane-like neck, the sharp angle of his jaw, the narrow slope of his upturned nose, all of it engraved with painful, heartbreaking detail in Yao Shen's mind.

Above all, he can't forget those cold phoenix eyes, angled sharply towards his temples. In his mind's eyes he always sees them narrowed in contempt, sneering at him with a subtle curl of his full upper lip.

Xin Hulei.

The motherfucker who got him kicked out of a talent show competition for young actors in the first round.

That's who they've cast to play Xie Huan?

---

didi- Chinese ride hailing app service, not the same characters as younger brother (pinyin also didi)

shizun - esteemed master. Same as Shifu (but hornier), master in a cultivation/ martial arts sect.