Chapter 195：It's Always Been You

Yu Jin stands nervously in front of the altar. He glances at Han Han who stands next to him, having the same nervous face. Yu Jin pats his shoulder, intending to calm Han Han down. Han Han jolts in surprised. Before he can respond to Yu Jin, a cello voice starts a serenade of music. Audiences who gather inside the church stand up and give their attention to the front door of the church.

Yu Jin also puts his sight to the door with an increased nervous. And then.. there she is. Xiao Ping shows up in front of the door. Beautiful as ever. Her make up and hair-do are just excelling her beauty to the next level. She is just perfect in her peach gown, making Yu Jin's heart skips a beat.

Accidentally, Xiao Ping's eyes meet his gaze. Yu Jin gives her a nervous smile, but the smile fades away when she deliberately moves her sight, busying herself with the long tail of veil she has to hold.

Yu Jin sighs to redeem his disappointment. It's been four years. She still hates him. It's understandable. A month after caught up Takeshi came to Xiao Ping, Yu Jin decided to break up with her. Yu Jin used his job at Hong Kong as a reason. He said that he couldn't do a long distance relationship, which of course was a big lie. The real reason was.. he was being a total selfish, not to mention a coward and moron. Despite Xiao Ping said it many times that Takeshi was no longer in her heart, he stubbornly didn't believe her. He couldn't stand the jealousy he kept inside his heart that finally he decided to leave her. It happened that he was accepted as a programmer in one of company in Hong Kong. So he used it as a reason. If only Han Han didn't insist him to come at his wedding and be his best man, he wouldn't be back to Taipei.

"Yu Jin-ge.. the ring," Han Han whispers to him, make him withdraws from his memory.

"Oh, yes.. sure," Yu Jin says in stammered, groping his pant's pocket to take the ring box. When Yu Jin is handing the box, he can feel Xiao Ping's gaze right to him. But when he sees her back, she quickly moves her sight.

At the wedding reception, Yu Jin is busy to find away to approach Xiao Ping. It is not as easy. Xiao Ping grows up to be a charming confident woman with a lot of friends. She is now non-stop chatting and meeting her friends and colleagues that are also guests at the wedding.

It is not until half the time of the wedding, Yu Jin can only approach her. It's dance time. Yu Jin braves himself queueing to dance with her with other two men. After the two men had their turns, Yu Jin approaches Xiao Ping.

"Hi," Yu Jin greets her nervously.

"Hi," Xiao Ping responds, barely shows her surprised.

"May I have a dance with you ?" Yu Jin asks. handing his hand. Xiao Ping looks at his hand for few seconds, which is like years for Yu Jin, then nods, "Al right."

With slightly limping, Yu Jin takes her to the dance floor. The band is playing a slow blues music, so they barely need to move their feet.

"You look awesome," Yu Jin praises her.

"Thank you. You look not bad neither," Xiao Ping responds to him. Then there is silence for some seconds. They just dance, awkwardly.

"I'm.. I'm sorry.." Yu Jin says in regret.

Xiao Ping raises her eyebrows. "For what ?"

"For being a jerk.. For being a moron.. For leaving you.."

Xiao Ping looks him in the eyes for a moment before giving him smile, a little bitterly. "It's the past."

Yu Jin nods. "It is, isn't it ?" He makes a gesture that signals Xiao Ping to turn. She follows him.

"How are you ? Where is your boyfriend.. or maybe husband already ?" Yu Jin changes the topic.

"I'm good, as you can see," Xiao Ping answers his first question.

"Boyfriend ?" Yu Jin urges her.

"Why do you want to know ?" She asks back with a little teasing tone.

"You're right. It's none of my business," Yu Jin quickly withdraws his question. Xiao Ping smiles to him. She throws her sight somewhere else while keeps dancing with Yu Jin.

"It's not my past," Yu Jin's words draw Xiao Ping's attention back to him. "You are not my past. You will never be my past," Yu Jin continues.

Xiao Ping's body is stiff. "Then you should never leave me in the first place," she says that in cold tone before leaving him alone at the dance floor.

--------

Yu Jin tries to find Xiao Ping but he can't see her anywhere at the party. Out of his frustration and guilt, he gets out of the party's room to have some air and smoke. He only turns on his lighter when his eyes find what he has been searching for. Xiao Ping sits on stair leaning to a wall on her left. She is drinking from a bottle on his hand. From the shape of the bottle. it must contains liquor in it.

Yu Jin in rush walks to her. "Hey.. hey.. Xiao Ping, stops it," he tries to make Xiao Ping stops drinking, but she doesn't listen.

"Xiao Ping, stop !" Yu Jin is finally able to grab the bottle out from Xiao Ping's hand, making the liquor spilled on the pavement.

"Hey.. give me back my bottle!" Xiao Ping shouts to him irritatedly.

"No, you are drunk already," Yu Jin refuses, deliberately spills all the bottle's content to the ground.

Xiao Ping sees him with a hateful gaze. "I hate you!!" She once again walks to leave him. But this time Yu Jin is quicker. He grabs her to his embrace.

"No! Let me go!! Leave me alone, you jerk!!" Xiao Pig struggles to escape from his embrace, but Yu Jin hugs her tighter.

"I'm sorry.. I'm sorry.. Forgive me.." Yu Jin keeps murmuring his apologize, not caring how many punches and kicks he receives from Xiao Ping. He doesn't even flinch, he just receives them as if he deserves every one of them.

Eventually, Xiao Ping is tired of punching and kicking Yu Jin. She just cries on to his chest. "I love you. I only love you even when you have never believed it. I loved you before you saved my life, I loved you because you saved my life, I loved you when he came to ask me back, I loved you when you left me. I even still love you now! How stupid I can be ?!" Xiao Ping bursts her heart out, making Yu Jin stunned.

"Do you think I haven't tried to forget you ? I went back with Takeshi just to realize that there is no more him in my heart. Do you realize how evil I was ? I broke that poor guy's heart twice within a year ! I've been dating I don't know how many guys, but no one can replace you!! Yes, you !! The moron that left me because of his insecurity. The jerk that never believed that he is the one that I love. You may not be my first, but it's always been you!!! I only love ..."

Yu Jin kisses her passionately, takes her words and even her emotional in instant as their tongues are entangled.

"You.." Xiao Ping is able to finish her words after the kiss, but in a dumbfounded way.

"I'm sorry. I've been a jerk. I thought you were going to be happy with him, that's why I left you. I still love you, too. For me it's always been you from the first time," Yu Jin whispers to her, touching her cheeks gently. "I will ask you this again when you are sober, but will you forgive me and accept me again as your boyfriend ?"

Xiao Ping looks him in the eyes. "I will answer it when I'm sober," she says, in totally drunk then smiles seductively, "For now, just let me kiss you again." Xiao Ping then pounces toward Yu Jin, makes him almost loses his balance and kisses him hard.