Volume 11.5 the girl in the peep glass

Translated online version from Baidu Post Bar: pure blue sky, icerush, little herring fish

today is March 31.

It's my brother's last day in this school.

"What a terrible expression"

I took a close look in the mirror and found my face very gloomy.

The reason is that I hardly slept yesterday.

How much time does my brother and I spend talking in this school?

although it's been a year, it must be less than a few hours.

It's inevitable that we should be ridiculed for not being as good as our friends.

Brother and sister.

They have a close and far distance, which is unexpected.

"Is it really OK to be separated from my brother in this way?"

I asked myself in the mirror.

Of course, even if you say it, you won't get a reply.

Only the gray face of me, constantly looking back at myself.

You don't need to peep into each other's eyes to know what they are saying.

I have a lot to say to my brother.

I can't accept the result of

just thinking about the past year.

But I haven't been able to create the time to talk to each other.

But Now it's different. Now that we can meet each other, it will be nice to meet each other openly.

Just meet and say goodbye.

"... No, I can't. "

now I don't even have the qualification to say goodbye.

Indeed, my relationship with my brother has changed.

I can have my brother look at me.

But

In the past year, I have hardly seen my brother grow up.

Even if I go to see him off like this, my brother will not be happy.

Rather, he will only worry about my incompetent sister.

I don't want to let such a mood ruin my brother's three-year brilliant school life.

It's better not to meet at all.

I think so.

I can't give my brother any trouble because of my willfulness

"No, it's not like that. It can't be good, can it? "

I asked myself in the mirror again.

I have nothing to show my brother.

But even so, evasion is not the right answer.

I have no problem. As long as I can convey this to my brother with confidence, the problem will be solved.

What to do?

What can I do?

Obviously, time is running out.

If I find myself stupid earlier.

If it was discovered soon after admission.

"It doesn't make sense to regret what happened, right "

it's eight o'clock in the morning.

At noon today, my brother is leaving.

"What to do - what to do?"

just show yourself, I think.

But now I am not the real me.

It's just a stupid sister chasing her brother.

In the mirror my figure overlaps with my past self.

"I After all... Who is it? "

Yes.

What's in the mirror is that you're not who you really are.

"... Fake copies "

now I'm fake.

In retrospect, more than half of life is spent as a hypocritical self.

I've been hiding my true self.

Have been using "this is the brother wanted sister" such a reason to deceive themselves.

No matter appearance, personality or achievement, everything is for brother.

A false replica made to gain the approval of his brother.

How can brother recognize such existence.

No, it's not like that. These years, I am the same.

We can't think of it as hypocrisy.

Although life is short, it can be said that we have spent half of our lives together.

You should not regret yourself like this.

But

"What I want my brother to see is What I really want my brother to see is "

there is only one thing I can show that person.

Now I can see that.

"Thank you. The hypocritical self is also the most real me. "

I looked in the mirror, at myself, and lowered my head.

Long hair fluttered.

Then I raised my head and looked away from the mirror.

Facing the past is over.

Time is running out.

As myself, I have something to do.

Something that was not noticed until the end.

That's the last gift for my brother to embark on the journey safely.