Old meng looked as if he had been there before and said, "Feelings are the hardest thing to say. People live their whole lives, and sometimes they just can't get over the emotional hurdle."
I looked at old meng suspiciously. I felt that there was a story in old meng's words. In the past, old meng rarely told us about these things. He said that old meng dried the wine in his glass and took out his cigarette to light it.
I helped him pour the wine.
Old meng took a deep puff and looked at me, saying, "Do you think people like uncle are just drunkards, smokers, perverts, a bad old man and a woman will stay away from me?"
I smiled and said nothing. In fact, what old meng said was right. He did have a lot of shortcomings. He was addicted to cigarettes and alcohol, and it was common for him to find a young lady. I guess it was really difficult to find a woman who was willing to live with him!
Otherwise, he would still be single at his current age. Basically, I think he could only be single for the rest of his life.
But some things are better left unsaid. After all, no one has any shortcomings. Just get along with them.
Old meng took another puff of smoke and narrowed his eyes, as if reminiscing about the past. After a while, he said, "Actually, I wasn't like this before. I never told you before. It wasn't because of a woman, and I wouldn't be like this."
I was a little curious. Old meng seemed to have experienced something unforgettable, so I asked old meng, "Uncle, what's wrong with you? Tell me."
Old meng was stunned for a moment, then smiled bitterly and said, "Forget it. It's all about old sesame seeds and rotten grains. It's okay to tell you. Tell it to the younger generation and let you think more about yourself and less regret."
Therefore, old meng began to tell about his love more than 20 years ago. Instead of immediately starting, old meng took out a lighter and lit a cigarette. The smoke was coming out of his mouth. I saw his face look even more vicissitudes in the smoke. In fact, old meng was in his forties, but he looked like more than fifty.
Old meng gulped down the wine in his cup again. He was already very good at drinking. If someone else drank so hard, he would have fainted immediately. When he almost finished the first cigarette, old meng lit the second cigarette in his hand, and then began to tell his story.
Old meng said that in fact, he used to be a very enterprising person, and he was definitely much better looking than he is now. No matter what, he was not the kind of person who looked like a hooligan, but now he is getting more and more like an old hooligan.
More than 20 years ago, in china, what kind of era was that? Now, I'm afraid we young people can only imagine from the movies and tv dramas, old, backward, poor, yellowish hues and narrow alleys, no floor, no gorgeous clothes, no big roads, no color tvs, only those old flashlights at home, as well as the old tea bottles and teacups we've seen on tv. It was as if everything in china was in the same style.
At that time, the young old meng and his friends and neighbors had been working in the factory, and the girl that old meng liked also worked there. To me, it was time to call her auntie, and old meng had always called her by her name, not by her name.
But I know, that name, must be deeply imprinted in his mind!
Old meng himself said that he was rather sulky at that time and secretly had a crush on others, but no one knew. But that was the case in that era as a whole. Almost all of them were blind dates, introduced relatives and friends, arranged by the elders, and free love seemed too open to everyone's eyes.
Old meng secretly liked this girl, and then a girl made an engagement with his friend. In fact, that friend of his could be counted as his childhood friend. They played naked together since childhood. Old meng said that his childhood friend was an honest man, and he was quite honest.
I don't know how old meng was feeling when he heard the news at that time, but even if he was immersed in memories at this time, I could feel his deep pain. Sometimes fate plays tricks on the little girl and the girl she likes!
I can't help but sigh when I hear this!
After that, he urinated and married the girl, but the two families were still neighbors. At the wedding, old meng had to pretend that nothing happened and forced a smile. In the past, he liked that girl, but now he has to say that he likes his little wife!
From then on, old meng had almost changed, becoming a little depressed, and his whole body was beaten down.
He suffered all alone, but no one told him. He could only bury these hardships in his heart. He fired his job in the factory, but he and the girl became neighbors, inevitably still had to meet every day, he was particularly embarrassed, but he could not forget that girl.
Old meng began to loaf around, and his whole self was resigned to depravity. That was when he started to smoke, drink, and gamble. His reputation was especially bad. At that time, when it was time to get married, his family was extremely angry with him, and they were especially disappointed in him. For a few years in a row, old meng became an older bachelor.
At that time, they married very early, and it was normal for them to get married around the age of twenty. Some of them got married at the age of seventeen or eighteen, but in a few years old meng twenty-five and sixty-six, it would be much harder to find a partner at this age.
But then something happened.
A good man does not live long. The girl's husband, old meng, was young, but died of illness at a young age. Although old meng was very sad at that moment, he told me today that he had some thoughts in his heart at that time, which he could not control.
The girl had become the mother of two children and a widow, and old meng wanted to take care of the widow's family.
Since ancient times, there have been many disputes in front of a widow's door. Whether it is true or false, it seems that her husband's death can be held on to the widow.
Not to mention that the girl was a particularly beautiful widow, and jealousy would produce a lot of malicious remarks for no reason.
But old meng knew exactly who she was when she was a girl, and he was very angry every time he heard the criticism about her. But he wanted to take care of the girl, but he did not dare to break through the secular world. If he married the girl, what would others say, what would they say?
Most of them could not say anything good. I guess they had already hooked up. If they were lewd like pan jinlian and shameless, the widow's reputation and his reputation would be ruined!
Old meng did not have the courage, although at this time he was extremely eager to take care of the widow's family!
However, even if they did not take that step, old meng usually helped the widow a lot, but the two of them had always been clear. Now old meng recalled that although the two of them did not cross the so-called moral line, he could feel that the widow had a good feeling for him.
Old meng would even feel an indescribable happiness. He seemed to think that it was enough just to stay by the widow's side. He did not dare to ask for more.
However, the widow still had two children, and the family still had to live. In fact, old meng had very little material help, and he was powerless. The burden of the family was all on the widow, and she lived a very hard life.
So, the widow married away again!
When he said this, old meng took another deep puff. I could see that his lips and hands were trembling. He closed his eyes as if his whole body had been hollowed out. He sat there like a statue, motionless.
It took a long time for old meng to open his eyes again. In those cloudy eyes, I saw regret and even tears that I had never seen before.
Old meng turned around and wiped his eyes before telling me the ending.
In those days, it was difficult for a widow to marry into a good family. A widow married into an outer village. A man who also lost his wife had never seen a widow again since old meng, but she had heard that she had a bad life.
Old meng, who looked especially old after his speech, finally shed two lines of tears at the corner of his eyes. He cried and said, "I made you laugh at Xing Yun."
I also felt bad for old meng's story and sighed deeply.
Old meng said, "If I had been brave, even if I had been brave, maybe the fate of her and I would have changed. Do you understand?"
I couldn't help but imagine what would happen if old meng was with that girl.
If old meng had gathered the courage to confess to the girl in the first place, perhaps both of them could have been together. After all, the bride and groom at that time were more obedient to their elders and marriage than to their loved ones.
Or perhaps, after the girl became a widow, old meng was able to break through the barriers in his heart and walk with the widow, regardless of the secular criticisms. In fact, this was very possible. After all, from old meng's story, I could feel that the widow had feelings for old meng, but I didn't know if the widow could open the shackles of the world.
However, such retreat and cowardice caused the tragedy of their lives!
"So!" Old meng smiled bitterly and said, "Young man, you have to think clearly. Don't leave any regrets in the future. When you regret for the rest of your life, it will be too late!"
To be honest, old meng's story had a huge impact on my heart. There was a moment when I even wanted to turn around and find Ding Ge and be with her.
I even think that I do owe a debt, but as long as I work hard, one day I will pay it off, right?
But reality is not a novel. A few hundred thousand may not be money to some people, but for a person who has no ability or ability, how can I pay him back by working for a living?
At this time, it seemed that he began to regret. He regretted that he was young, arrogant, and did not study hard. Now, he ended up like this and did not want to be tied down too much. He naively thought that he could make a big difference with his own hands!
However, after entering society for a long time, we will find that sometimes it is so difficult to become a human being. We always look forward to a beautiful future with great dreams, but in the end, we lose to reality and become a person led by life.
I thought, if I were a good student and got into a good university, wouldn't I be like this?
After all, I am not old meng, and my story is different from his. And I always thought that I would be happy without Ding Ge, even happier than being with me.
So, my mind still hasn't changed.
However, I thought about it and decided to accompany dinger to the beach.