Chapter 223 - Zurich And Bella

(Author POV)

Zurich looked into Bella's face who was currently lying on the hospital bed. Bella will indeed do some treatment for her psyche. Although Bella doesn't know if she really has a mental illness. But in order to solve all Zurich's curiosity, Bella finally relented.

They already knew the news of the attack, but they couldn't do anything. They had already sailed on a fast boat, they could only see the island burning in a very sadistic manner.

Zurich looked into Bella's eyes who just stared blankly at the ceiling of the hospital room, There is no luxury, honor, or fame from the Name she currently bears. Zurich still has not fulfilled his promise as a lover who can make his woman happy, just once.. when God opens the door of heaven later, Zurich wants to enter Bella first and ask God to take away all Bella's sins and delegate them to Zurich. he feels useless, he wants healing, wants Happiness to be given to his lover who has been very pathetic.

Zurich wants the world to give all its love to Bella, a woman, a mother-to-be who has never had luck.

Gently caressing Bella's belly, there's a baby living in there. Zurich must defend whatever it takes, no matter what.

"Are you crying?" Suddenly Bella's voice interrupted Zurich's movement, which was stroking the woman's stomach. 

"My baby is fine," Bella said again. Zurich was silent for a moment. Bella knew she was pregnant? but why not tell Zurich?

"You know?" Zurich was at a loss for what to say.

"I've had time to take a pregnancy test, because I really want your child.. After a week around you, every morning I always ask the waiter to buy a testpack. And I always test it. I already know that I'm pregnant, actually I want to tell you in a romantic way, but I didn't have time" say Bella,

Zurich moved his hand and touched his lover 's face. "Sorry, I didn't want to tell you that you were pregnant.. I just didn't want you to feel lost again" Zurich said feeling guilty.

"Why do you have to apologize? You know? Mrs. Berenice once told me that every pain we feel is God's love for us. The pain slowly erodes our sins, I know right now God really loves me and our children, God is just testing how strong we are in living this life.. You don't blame God anymore, because now I feel happy with all the pain there is" Bella stroked Zurich's face back, they stared at each other for a long time.

"I don't know if I will really blame God for everything that happens. But God always takes our Happiness" Zurich spoke softly, stroking his lover's hand and not letting this warmth pass.

"Don't... The more we blame God, the more our sins will increase. I'm enjoying this moment, the moment when God lifts my sins through the pain that God gave me. I'm also happy, because now you are beside me" Bella smiled, her face turned towards Zurich, she lightly kissed the lips of the man in front of her

"I will try not to blame God, I did everything for you. Even though I know everyone will think I am stupid, stupid for defending yourself, stupid for choosing you, stupid for wanting to force you my wife. I only know if another woman becomes my lover at this time. 

Surely they will not be able and will never be able to live in pain. But you? You always try to improve your life, you who were blaming God, are now starting to love God. the more you feel pain, the closer your belief is to God. Your creator. You are special, I will never get a lover like you. You admit you are wrong when you are wrong, you repent for all those mistakes." Zurich kisses the back of his lover's hand.

"You are more beautiful when you say sweet things like this, I just realized that after so many problems, those problems also changed our mindset, changed our relationship. which used to be very far away, is now close" Zurich is getting more and more applauded by all of Bella's thoughts, in a pain like this, she still wants to think positive things and doesn't blame anyone. Her lips smiled wider and she wasn't scared at all. She knew that there was a door of forgiveness waiting for her out there.

"My heart is calmer now, because I'm getting closer to God. or because God really calms my heart.. but I just want God to give me the opportunity to be a complete mother for this child in my womb, I ask God for one chance. to breastfeed my baby and hold him, after that. after that I leave everything to God again" Zurich nodded in front of his lover's face, he wiped his tears that dripped slowly. Hope the same, hope their baby can really be born into this world.

"Hopefully.. may God hear" Zurich kissed the back of Bella's hand again and lowered his head feeling all the seconds ticking by. felt his lover's heartbeat which Zurich could still hear today.

"Have you eaten?" Bella asked who knew that at this time her lover must have a very heavy burden on her mind.

"No, I didn't have time to eat.. Do you want to eat something?" Zurich asked.

"I want grilled salmon with BBQ sauce, but I want it still warm. Can I eat fish?" Bella asked.

"I'll ask the Doctor if he allows it. Then I'll give you grilled salmon. Are you really hungry?" Zurich said with a laugh.

"Not really, somehow when I think of grilled salmon. I'm drooling." Bella laughed when she said that, Zurich just smiled and stroked his lover's head.

"Wait a minute, the doctor is out.. Maybe in a few minutes he will be back" Bella nodded when Zurich said that the two lovers finally just kept quiet with their own thoughts.