1 Another cliche................?

Ryan opened his eyes in space. He was floating. 'Oh great! So I really died..... Damn it, I died a virgin! Well, its not like I expected any romance in my life with those paranoid weirdos' creepy PIs (private investigators) tailing me all the time. yeah my nana was rich wasn't she? now all that money is gonna go to that perfect Baaaah!!!!!!' Ryan's thought came to an abrupt end with a scream as he saw a pair of bulged shiny eyes looking at him from a dark area. 'How is it even possible to be dark here? it is space for god's sake', Ryan thought, as he was in the process of being creeped out by it. Then he understood it was emerging, as in, being created, like a 3D printer. As the rest of the body was completed, he was shocked. Then his face was filled with contempt, as said "very funny dude" with a serious tone and facepalmed himself. He had watched 'Death note' countless times. Hence, he got reference in god appearing as a Shinigami in front of him. "A random heart attack and now this, gimme a break!" Ryan said, in a disappointed tone.

"Don't like it? fine. Hey, but you gotta give me points for imagination, pulled it off, didn't I?", God said as the Shinigami was replaced by a man in a smooth silver robe. His features were equally smooth too, with a gentle, but enchanting face and perfectly proportioned limbs and muscles. Looking at this inhumanly handsome smiling guy, Ryan asked with a tinge of envy: "Now who are you, Julius Caesar, are you that ugly to show your true form? Come on man! I won't judge". God looked at his with an expression as if he had been wrong. He replied: "This is me! You are just jealous to accept it, you brat! Anyway, why are you talking to me like that? You must have figured out I'm God by now". "Yeah I did, I just didn't wanna get all humble and subservient cuz of it, besides, this is more fun" Ryan replied with a smile on his face. "Indeed it is" God replied with a pensive expression and continued: "Anyway, you know the drill, you are gonna get reincarnated, but let me be clear, it is not cuz you did something really really good, you good-for-nothing shut-in, it is cuz you have an equal record and I can't judge you, so I gotta get rid of you from my world, so, where do you wanna go?". "Douluo Dalu!" Ryan shouted subconsciously. "All right, I think it is possible, let me look it up on my iPad" God replied. "Hmph, you dont need that, you're just showing off" Said Ryan, to which God replied "Yes I am, so suck it up", with a laugh.

"Yeah, you can go to Soul Land" God said after a minute. "Good, now, for my five wishes..." Ryan said thinking deeply. "Whoa! Whoa! what wishes? Do you think I am a genie? You ain't getting any wishes!" God said, startled. "Oh come on Old man! I kept it entertaining for you all this time, I should get some prize" Ryan said, in a pleading tone. "Fine, two and thats all you get, use wisely" God said after thinking a some time. "First, I want a soul pagoda in my mental realm where there is a hell lotta spiritual energy and two exteremely strong cultivation technique, one for mind and one for body" Ryan said, with a sly smile. " Ok, done! wait a minute, thats not one, thats two wishes!" God said. "No, it was one sentence, hence, one wish, geez god, I thought you were a man of your word! Anyway, my second wish is that I wanna be an extremely handsome, tall, strong man with twin spirits that are mindblowingly strong and rare" Ryan finished, with a serious look. "Why, you sly son of a bitch!..." God got a bit annoyed but then a smile blossomed on his charming face as he said, "Fine, I will give you twin spirits and make you handsome, now off you go", and he tore opened space, got behind Ryan and kicked him into the void, and shouted " About their strength, I will think about it you braaat!!!!!" to Ryan who was slowly disappearing. Ryan looked back, shocked, and yelled : "You sick bastard, I will beat you half to death when I become a God if you play any more games with me!!!!! Just wait!!!!!". God replied loudly "You're welcome to try", turned his fading body and walked back, as he whispered to himself, "I'm rooting for that little guy".