12 Chapter 12

"Chto vy dumali o? Oni mogli ubit' yeye!"

I'd know that Russian accent anywhere, it was Mikhail. I had no idea how long I'd been out but I was now slowly coming back from the black abyss. There were people around me, I sent out my mental feelers and checked auras quickly. Mikhail's golden glow welcomed me but quickly shifted to a dark amber then lightning yellow. He was furious. The other two auras were blue, helpful, sorrowful, worried and both were lined with deep shades of pink which indicated fear. They were afraid of Mikhail. I decided it best to listen in and observe their interaction's.

"I assure you Mikhail, had we known he was an Archaic Seer we would never have sent her. Our information was badly corrupted. Please, try to calm down." came the ever calm reply of the man I knew to be my long time Elder and Leader from THE ELITE, Dumask.

"I AM CALM!" Mikhail roared in response. The wolf was teeming to be set free.

The third man paced in front of the door to my office. I could barely make out his face but after a moment there was no need. I knew the familiar smell of Scotch and disinfectant. Doc was here.

"Both of you need to take a minute. Now, I've stabilized her, she should come round any minute. BOTH of you listen closely. Dumask you know I've been a long time Physician for THE ELITE, and I've never done you wrong."

"Yes, you most certainly have been a loyal friend to us.."

"Then heed my warning. Redalia, is in a fragile state. Her powers are fluctuating and manifesting in strange new way's. I'm going to need access to the old archives Dumask. I need to research a few thing's and find out what's happening to her. In the meantime I suggest you try to keep her calm, don't upset her. Her powers seem to be more rapid and unconstrained when she's upset."

"Doc....is she...is she a threat to us now?" Dumask asked tentatively.

The room grew deathly silent. I could hear the men breathing, the patrons in the front of the bar hollering and laughing, finally Doc spoke again.

"If she loses control she could very well destroy, everything. Redalia is the most powerful being this world has ever seen. That same power is eating her alive, it want's out, it want's to be used. The longer she bottles it up the worse the explosion will be when it's finally set free. Does she know....about her...other half yet?"

"No, I hadn't planned on burdening her with the detail's just yet. I wanted to wait to see if Conall....well, if he was truly her mate, but I suspect now, that there is something you haven't told me, old friend."

It was Mikhail's turn to answer after a long pause full to the brim with expectancy.

"Yes, Conall McGreggor is not the True Wolf King. He is in fact the second son of King Quinn and Queen Ekaterina (yehkahteeREEnah). I am the first born descendant of the Queen and King."

A gasp came from where Doc stood. Dumask however didn't sound as if he was to shocked at hearing this news. I shouldn't be surprised nothing ever shock's him.

"Does Conall know about you?" Dumask asked.

"No, Conall hails more from our fathers side where as I tended to lean closer to mother. After I had the vision of Cernunnos and Redalia I knew I couldn't stay in The Black Forrest. I had to leave, I had to give her a chance to choose me because she wanted me, not because we were supposed to be together. Father was slightly less than pleased. His only heir was leaving for what he decreed was a folly of a reason, he always said "You can not fight fate." From what I heard later on, he had removed me from his life completely...I didn't blame him for this. After a while mother became pregnant with another child. She wrote to me often about how thing's were going, Unfortunately it wasn't long after Conall's birth, that she died. She took my existence with her to the grave. Had I known Conall would develop this warped sense of obligation, I would have done a few thing's differently."

"Well that explains how he could make the Moonstone glow. I expect he used magic or some kind of potion on Redalia as well?"

"Yes, he used magic. He and I were both born with special abilities. He can speak telepathically, heal anyone, and with a little help from some dark magic he made it so he could influence Redalia's decisions and feeling's. You have to understand though, in his mind HE is the True Wolf King. He believes it with all his heart. So to him, he didn't lie to Redalia when he told her he loved her."

"I was told Redalia and Conall mated....is this true?"

"Yes, he bit her with her consent."

"Goddess! Could that have something to do with why her power's are frantic?"

"I can't say for sure but I have a feeling it might. I have distanced myself from her for far too long. It is because of me she was susceptible to Conall's dark magic. I admit my fault's, but I will not admit defeat. I will not see her harmed, by anyone. I'm sending some men back to Procious to obtain the parking garage footage. I want to see if they captured a good shot of the faces of Redalia's assailants. Dumask you need to try to find out what happened with your intel. Doc, find out what you can from the archives. We can not afford to trust anyone now."

"No one? What about the other members of the council? Dumask can't be keepin secret's from them. It's against their code."

"It is alright Doc, my fellow Elder's trust me. If I say it is a matter of personal interest they will leave it alone. Now, when do you want to get started on the archives?"

"The sooner the better I think."

"Fine, come with me, Mikhail, we're leaving her to you."

"I understand."

"May you walk always in shadow, old friend."

"Poka my ne vstretimsya snova, Do Svidaniya." (Until we meet again. Goodbye/Farewell)

I listened as the two men left my office, Mikhail exhaled deeply before opening the door again and calling out for Alexi.

"Da, ser?" (Yes, sir)

"Alexi take Ivan and Daniil and go retrieve the footage of tonight from the guard shack at the parking garage across the street from The Duchess Hotel in Procious. I'll need to review it immediately."

"Da, ser."

"Oh Alexi, tell Alexandria, Redalia is in rough shape and the bar need's to close early."

"Da,ser. Chto-nibud' yeshche?" (Yes, sir. Anything else?)

"Net, prosto idi skoreye." (No, just go quickly.)

"Da, moy tsar'" (Yes, my king.)

After he closed the door again he came to sit on the floor by the couch I was sprawled out on. He began to stroke my arm and play with my finger's. I shifted slightly, it was time for he and I to have a little chat. I let my eye's flutter open as I tried to sit up, an action I quickly regretted.

Mikhail was on me in an instant, lifting me to a sitting position. I smiled my thanks at him then flinched as a surge of pain took hold of my abdomen. He stood and walked to my desk then back again, in his hand he held out a bottle of pills and a cup of water.

"Doc said when you came too, to take these. He said they'd help with the pain."

"I don't take pain medication." I said sternly.

"Redalia you should take something. It's only going to get worse."

"No, I don't take them. I never have and I won't start now. I may crack a joke about needing one the size of a horse but that's all it is, a joke. Narcotics dampen my magic. They make me groggy and make it hard to focus and use my powers."

"I understand that, but I won't let anything happen to you. Tonight I'm going to take you home myself. If you permit me I'd like to take up a temporary stay on your couch. Just until you are healed. I know it's a lot to ask, especially with what happened between you and Conall..."

At the mention of his name everything came flooding back. The hit and how he looked at me right before I killed him, the crazed vision I had when I was dying in the parking garage,then I remembered why I was dying.

I remembered the assailant. I began remembering what he had done to me, how he told his men to hold me down, how he had ripped my clothes and beat me then told me he would be the one to end me only after rapping over and over until he grew bored with me.

Everything was coming in crystal clear now. I wanted to scream, to lash out, to beat something, to kill something.....to cry. But to my dismay, the last time I checked...assassins don't cry. I fought back tears, biting the inside of my lip and jaw and averting my gaze away from Mikhail.

Thankfully at that moment Alex started banging on the door demanding to be let in. Mikhail obliged and unlocked then opened the door for her, just enough so she could slip in. Judging by the look of sheer horror on her face I could tell I didn't look so hot.

"Oh Red, what the hell happened? I thought it was a quick hit?!"

"Yeah, so did I. Turn's out...I was very, very wrong."I tried to laugh, pain shot through me like a bolt of lightning...nope. Not happening!

"Goddess Red, are you going to be ok? Has anyone called Doc? By the way just where were you at exactly?!" she said as she looked over her shoulder at Mikhail.

Mikhail held her gaze but I saw the pain that ate at him. His aura was a swirling sea of misery and self-hatred. He hated himself for not being there to save me in time. Ha! Join the club buddy. I hated myself for needing him to help me in the first place!

"Alex take it easy on em, he's beating himself up enough about it. Besides, you should see the other guy!" I winked, sort of...

"Girl you have to be the luckiest person to ever walk this earth. You look like you need a long hot bath and a good massage. Want me to call my cousin Romeo? You know he just finished up his Massage Therapy classes at the University."

Mikhail went rigid at the mention of Alex's cousin.

"Nah, I'll be ok. Thanks for the offer though. Can I hold onto it for a bit? I may need a good massage later."

"Sure girl, you know he'd be happy as duck during rabbit season."

We both laughed. Well she laughed I just sort of writhed in pain at the mere attempt...no the THOUGHT of attempting to laugh. Then she gave me a hug, brushed some hair from my face and agreed to close the bar down an hour early.

"I'll leave the till in the safe for the night then count it in the morning ok."

"Yeah that's fine go ahead. Thanks for doing this Alex."

"I'm your best girlfriend, it's what I'm supposed to do! Girl Code!"

"Ha! Yeah Girl Code!" I threw up my fist, then jerked as once again pain ripped through my side.

Alex was true to her word, she announced closing time at one a.m, cleaned the place up, loaded the till into the safe, hugged me again, gave Mikhail strict orders not to let me move or do anything until I had healed, then she left. Man, my best friend is pretty great!

No doubt I'll have a nice message waiting for me on my cell when I get home, from Jax. Unless Alex decides to wait and tell him tomorrow, which I silently hopped she did. I was way to tired and in way to much pain to deal with a mad Jax.

Just then a knock came at the door. Mikhail opened it and retrieved a DVD of some kind from the man outside the door. I tried to make myself a bit more straightened and presentable as Mikhail opened the door a bit more to reveal Alexi. Then I realized the DVD was the footage from the parking garage, I'd heard him tell Alexi to retrieve it earlier tonight.

This was something I definitely did not want to deal with at the moment. I needed to go home, get cleaned up and chill on my bed so I could heal properly. I cleared my throat as politely as one can, then motioned for Mikhail to come closer. He obediently did as I asked.

"I'd like to go home. I need to get cleaned up and comfortable so I can begin the healing process. I don't want to deal with anything else tonight. Please....just take me home."

I hadn't realized how upset I really was until I almost began to cry just then. Once again I mentally slapped myself and sucked it up. Because as I believe I previously stated... Assassins don't cry! Mikhail was very understanding. He scooped me up in his arm's as gently as he could and carried me to my truck.

"Alexi."

"Da,ser?"

"Tonight move the men to the manor. I want rotating shifts on every two to four hours. You are to do an entire, thorough search of the perimeter. Is that understood?"

"Da, ser!" he glanced down at me, sorrow filling his soft blue eye's.

"Alexi." Mikhail said in a bit of a deeper tone.

"Da?"

"She will be fine."

"I know. I'm sorry for doubting."

"Go, tell the others. I'll meet you outside the gate before she lays down for the night."

"Da, moy tsar'" He saluted and off he went.

Mikhail carried me across the parking lot with ease. After placing me in my passenger seat he climbed in on the driver side, slipped the keys into the ignition and gave a wisp of a smile as my ol truck roared to life.

He placed his leather jacket across me before slipping the truck into reverse and backing out of the lot then turning onto the main road. I watched his facial expressions as we drove home. Looking for any sign's of what was to come. He was very good at hiding his feeling's.

I decided to delve a little deeper. I closed my eye's and focused on his thought's. Pain riddled my body, but I had to push it away. I couldn't think about that now. There were other matters at hand to deal with.

Just as I thought, he was locked up tighter than a ticks rear-end. I had to try though. I slowly pressed on the barrier he had placed up around himself. After a moment or two I found a crack and let my mind flow through it like water over a smooth stone.

"I can't believe this. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why didn't I just follow her to the damned hit. I knew she was going the minute her body language changed. Goddess, this is all my fault! I should have been there! Now she's in so much pain. I can feel it, it's running through me like hot iron. I deserve this though. I never should have left her. I never should have left either of them.....Conall.....he would never have done what he did had I stayed. All this, Conall, Redalia....Father...it's all on my shoulder's. If I lose her...Goddess she doesn't even know how much I...how much I love her. She has no clue for how long I've loved her. She'd never want me now though. Once she realizes it's all my fault. If I would have stayed, I would have warned him not to help the bastard sorcerer, I would have sensed the danger. He'd still be alive, my people wouldn't be in hiding or scattered across the counties. My brethren in arm's wouldn't be turning into Dark Reapers...Redalia would be safe, happy, and...and...no. She wouldn't be with me. I would never force her to be with me just because it's whats expected. I could never take away her freedom. I swear, once this is over and Doran is dead...I'll find a way to break her bond with Conall. I'll set her free so that she can choose her own path. I'll have to leave her though. She'll never be truly free if I'm still around. I'd rather slip into the darkness of the void than force her into my arm's. I hope one day she can forgive me for everything I put her through."

I withdrew from his thought's. Now I seriously might cry. How could he blame himself so much. I mean he did what he did so I could be free. He thought about me and my life before his own happiness. A bump in the road jolted the truck and me, causing more pain. I noticed Mikhail slightly flinch at the very moment I felt the shock of pain.

He really did feel every bit of my hurt. I didn't want this! It isn't fair, he's beating himself up enough he shouldn't have to endure this torture! I opened my mouth to speak but before I could say anything he slowed to a stop and rolled the window down.

Alexi greeted him in Russian. They exchanged a few word's thenAlexi saluted and left. Mikhail then turned to me.

"Redalia I need you to invite me beyond the boundaries."

"Oh, ok so I have to say it out loud?"

"Yes, if you please."

"Ok, no problem. Mikhail I invite you and your comrades inside the barrier."

"Thank you."

As we drove through the gate it looked as if we were driving under a waterfall of golden shimmering water. Then just as quickly as it came the beautiful sight was gone again. I leaned against the door as we pulled round the drive and stopped in front of the manor.

Mikhail shut off the engine then turned to face me, placing his hand on my cheek as he did so. I thought I almost saw an actual smile begin to spread across his face, but maybe it was just a trick of the moonlight.

After helping me out and eventually carrying me to my bathroom upstairs where I forced him to let me shower, Mikhail went back downstairs to speak with his men again. I moved slow but at least I can move, am I right?!Man that was a beating and a half.

I don't usually go down so easily. Maybe Doc is right and there's something up with my magic. Figures, why the heck does everything have to happen to me?! I managed to get myself showered and as odd as it sounds I actually felt a bit better afterwards.

I dried off then towel dried my hair and applied some frizz control serum to it before giving up and just slipping into my fav pair of flare leg sleeping/yoga pant's and a tank top. I heard muffled voices coming from downstairs and decided to do a little investigating.

Every step was like a kick in the rib's but I was determined to see what was up. Once I had managed to descend the stairs I looked to my left and saw the living room had a group of men in it with Mikhail in the middle as the rest sat perched on one knee all around him.

I tried my best to give a bit of a smile and straighten my back as I walked into the room that now felt very cramped. Everyone in the room bowed their head's to me as I walked by. I patted their shoulder's and thanked them. After a moment I decided to enjoy having people around me again.

"Please, you don't have to bow. You are all guests in my home. Your welcome to the extra beds and couch's. There's the sectional in the family room, the two couch's in here and a multitude of room's for anyone who need's to use them. My kitchen is also open to y'all. I cook breakfast about 8-ish if anyone want's to join me. There's plenty of pop, tea, milk, coffee, cappuccino, and of course there's a bit ofMoonshine for those brave souls who dare try it."

The men started to chuckle and banter with each other amongst themselves but a glance from Mikhail silenced them.

"You have your duties for the night, now bid the Queen goodnight and be on your way."

The men each rose then bowed once to Mikhail then myself. There were about ten of them, I made a mental note to remember to get their names. If they were going to be here 24/7 I should at least try to get to know them right? Off they went, as the door closed behind the last man I looked around the living room.

I hated being alone, I hated having such a big empty house too. The ghost's of the past always seemed to be heard better when I was alone, I brushed the memories from my childhood away as I turned to face Mikhail. He was watching me with silent intrigue. I crossed my arm's as I usually did absentmindedly.

For a moment he looked as if he wanted to say something but thought better of it. His fist's remained clenched at his side as he walked past me then turned towards the kitchen. He held out his hand to me then, I crossed the room and took it without a second thought. As I let him lead me down the hall I focused in on his hand wrapped around mine.

It felt so strange, so foreign yet so....like home. I wanted him to touch me, a lot. This time I couldn't blame it on the hormones, I had absolutely no sex drive at the moment. I was still in need of a good night's rest so I could fully heal. When we arrived in the kitchen I started to lead him away from the actual nook in the corner where I had first sat with Conall, but as if he were reading my own thoughts, he directed me instead to the island.

Once there he puled out my chair then helped scoot me in once I was settled. He then went to the stove and leaned his back against it, crossing his arms over his chest and staring at me. Warmth filled my ice cold bones, heat began to creep up my spine in the usual "turned on" way.

I stamped it out. I was in no mood to become aroused. But I'll be damned if that fire didn't wanna burn me alive. I focused instead on my need for caffeine. I rubbed the back of my neck then massaged my temples for a quick moment before opening my eyes back up and locking on to Mikhail's beautiful molten gold and amber one's.

"Care to make me a drink while your standing there comrade?"

A smile played at the corners of his mouth, he tried so desperately to hide it but I caught it.

"What would you like?"

"Hmm, Oh I know! French Vanilla Cappuccino. There's acanister in the cabinet. Just heat up some water and add it to a cup with about four tablespoons of mix in it then drop two ice cubes in it. Think you can handle that?"

"Da."

Oh man that accent. Here comes the fire again! No! Stop it! Down hormones, DOWN I say! Geez! Well while we're here I may as well ask a few question's, and maybe help him understand that this isn't his fault. But how can I go about doing that without letting him know I invaded his privacy? This situation requires tact, stealth, and cleverness.....I'm screwed.

"Mikhail?"

"Hm?" was his reply. I watched him measure out exactly one and a half cups of water then add it to the pot to warm it.

"May I ask you something?"

"Da."

A thousand question's flooded my brain at once. I wanted to ask. Why me? Why did he feel he wasn't good enough? How did he escape Doran? Why did he never try to come sooner? Why didn't he want me to tell Conall about him? Where had he been this whole time? How did he know so much about practically everything? How did he have so many followers if nearly all the Wolven were enslaved, run off, killed or turned into Dark Reapers?

All these questions buzzing, buzzing, buzzing round inside my head but when I went to speak there was only one question that stood out above all the rest, I knew I should have felt self-centered for asking it but at this point I didn't care.

"Do you care about me?"

During my inner monologue he had poured the water into the coffee cup with the cappuccino in it and had stirred it. He also placed two cubes of ice in it as well. He stopped what he was doing and just stood staring at the cup in his hand's for a long moment before finally turning around to me.

He gently laid the cup down in front of me and leaned back against the stove again and once more he crossed his arm's over his chest. He didn't look at me immediately though, he sorta just stared off into space for a minute or two before answering.

"I have cared for you since before you were ever thought of by any other, aside from the Gods and Goddesses."

"Why? You didn't know me. I could have turned out to be a terrible person. I could have become evil...like Doran."

"You would never turn evil Red. You have to much good in you."

"How could you know though? Because Cernunnos showed me to you in a dream?"

"I felt you, I felt your heartbeat, your joy, your happiness. I knew you were my one."

"But still you left. You left me. Alone...I was so alone."

His head shot up to look directly at me. His beautiful face showed the tell tale signs of utter self-loathing. His heart was breaking, I felt it breaking as if it were my own.

"I never meant..."

"What? To hurt me? Oh yeah that's easily said. But you knew I would never be able to love another, not truly anyway. You let me go through life feeling empty, alone, and sad. You could have came back, you could have told me." My voice became strong and hot with anger.

"I'm so sorry, I..."

"Stop! Stop telling me your sorry! You abandoned me! Your mate! Wolven mate for life Mikhail, or did you miss that lesson in your history class? But you abandoned me, to go off and do what exactly?"

"Redalia...I, I moved to Russia after I left. I stayed with my mothers family. What was left of it. I started training, honing my combat skills so I could one day come back here and be..." he looked away again.

"And be what Mikhail? Huh? Please enlighten me as to what you HAD to be before you came back to claim me?"

"...Worthy."

"Worthy huh? Well now, isn't that a pip. You know what Mikhail I'd rather have had you here with me and us be happy and feel like we were whole than to have some skilled warrior whom I barely know. What about your brother? Why didn't you go home after he was born? Why did you never contact him?"

"I couldn't. Father didn't want me too..."

"There you go blaming someone else. Mikhail you didn't come back because you didn't want too! Not because of King Quinn. I'm so sick of being lied to by everyone I'm supposed to trust!"

I stood and slammed my fist on the marbled island top. Mikhail looked so torn and hurt.

"Admit it. You didn't want to be with me!"

"No! I'll never admit what isn't true!"

"Admit it! It's your fault! It's all your fault! Every bit of it!"

"I..."

"Admit it!" I slammed my fist again. Mikhail was growing extremely irritated.

"Redalia, I..."

Stop Lying! Admit your guilt!"

Suddenly he slammed his palms down on the island so hard it nearly split in two. He looked me dead in the eye as he roared his reply.

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"NO! IT WASN'T MY FAULT!"

I took a step back as I crossed my arms under my chest. Then I smiled and arched an eyebrow as if to say "Finally!". Mikhail was breathless as he stood and composed himself. Running a slightly shaky hand over the back of his neck and licking his lips as he realized what I'd done.

"Exactly." was all I said.

I gently picked up the cappuccino that I now no longer wanted and walked over to the sink to pour it out. I rinsed out the cup and left it in the sink upside down then turned and started for my room. I was now dead tired, I didn't get far before Mikhail halted me by grabbing my hand softly. I looked over my shoulder but didn't make eye contact.

"The event's that lead up to this day are all in the past. The Goddesses and Gods knew what would happen. They always do. You need to know I do not blame you for anything. You did as you were meant to do. Now you are here, because you were meant to be here, now. Stop blaming yourself for thing's you had no control over."