Chapter Thirty-six

Emery

I instantly run down the empty hallway, ignoring the guards that has been guarding this floor; just incase someone barges in to sabotage us. Things are slightly different now, us, royalties aren't able to be in public for too long because we worry about our safety.

My legs come to a halt as I see Evelyn and my mother wiping away their fallen tears while Andrea tries his best to soothe her—then, I'm noticed by them. I make my way towards them, realising that I'm late.

''Let me see her,'' I say, trying to get inside.

But, Evelyn stopped me before I could.

''The doctors are in with her; she's going through surgery and it'll be quite long,'' She mutters from behind, making me look at her in confusion. Then, realisation hits me once more; our baby.

''No. This can't be,'' I breathe out in disbelief. ''What did the doctors say, Evelyn? What did they say about her? What about the baby? What the hell is going on? God, I can't—'' I am left gasping for air; my heart has never felt this much of a pain or suffer.

''Emery, I'm so sorry,'' She hesitates to say.

''It's all my fault,'' I mutter under my breath; loud enough for me to hear. This is all my fault, indeed because if I was there, we wouldn't be here.

With no hope or opportunity, I fall onto the ground before leaning my head against the wall. My mind can only think of Emma and our baby; the baby that we were going to raise, a child of our own. That was the beginning of our happiness—a miracle.

I close my eyes, hoping this is just a nightmare.

''We should get a puppy,'' She says, her lips curving up into a smile as she stares deeply into my eyes. As for me, I can't help but agree; the way her beauty just melts me in every way possible. It's crazy.

''A puppy, huh?'' I question, caressing her cheek.

''I've always wanted a Siberian Husky. They're alert, outgoing, gentle, friendly and even intelligent. It'll be great to have more company around,'' She mutters. Without me realising, she has already pulled me to sit up straight so that she can sit on my lap.

Her brown eyes are staring directly into mine.

I lean forward to kiss her on the lips, feeling the warmth and the softness of it. She responds back by kissing me gently; following the rhythm. Both of her hands are on my neck, pulling me closer.

''Daddy!'' We are interrupted by our little girl, running and heading towards us with a flower in her hand as she giggles—catching our attention.

My heart warms at the sight of her as she sits beside me before letting me pull her so that she'll be able to sit on my lap after Emma has moved away. Her light brown eyes and light brown hair are radiant due to the sun shining brightly above her head.

''I want a puppy too,'' She giggles, smiling.

''Mummy must've talked to you to persuade me, huh? Now, both of you wants a puppy,'' I raise an eyebrow at my wife, seeing that she's currently chuckling at my behaviour. As for our daughter, she won't stop poking my face and smiling widely.

She's known for that; beautiful smile.

''Please, daddy. Can we get a puppy?'' Her big round eyes are always tempting me to give in. She would know what to do or how to do when she wants something; she always achieve it. I can never say no to a beautiful little girl like her—it's crazy how having a daughter or even a child, changes everything.

''Of course we can. In fact, we'll get one today,'' I reply and she starts to jump up and down after tucking the flower behind my ear; making me look like one of her dolls. Emma won't stop laughing once she sees me looking like this but hey, I like it.

My baby girl starts to hug me around the neck, making me pat onto her back before pulling her close. Then, ''I love you, daddy.'' She whispers.

I look up at my wife, seeing her eyes tearing up but her smile never fading away. Once I've reached for her hand, I begin squeezing it, ''I love you more,'' I answer; stating the truth, loud and clear.

''Let's go get a puppy!'' She exclaims, happily.

Emma and I laugh at her behaviour, realising how she's much more like her mother. The way her eyes are always attracting people and how her small little nose just makes her look cute; she's adorable. My daughter is an adorable, beautiful, girl.

And I'm more than thankful to have two beautiful girls in my life—my wife and my daughter.

I immediately stand up straight, gesturing for the doctor to continue on speaking. Evelyn smiles at me before patting onto my back, ''I'll be back in a couple of hours, okay?'' She says, pecking onto my cheek as she walks away down the hall; leaving me.

''How's my wife? Is she okay? Our baby?'' I ask.

The doctor clears his throat as he looks down at the ground before looking back up at me, ''I'm sorry, Your Highness, but we weren't able to save your baby. Your wife was bleeding badly and it affected the baby,'' He replies, sympathy showing in his eyes.

''But your wife is inside, waiting for you. She is stable and healing,'' He continues before walking down the hall and leaving me thinking of the dream I had minutes ago and the reality that I'm facing.

Without further ado, I head inside, seeing that I'm greeted with a beeping sound; making me turn to see Emma laying on the bed with her eyes closed. My lips curving up into a smile at the sight of her but sadness consumes me when I realise that it's just her.

Emma opens her teary eyes, slowly.

''Hey,'' I mutter under my breath, loud enough.

She smiles back, slightly. ''Hi,'' Her voice low and sounded like she was in pain. The way her face is pale; no colour coming from it—almost kills me. I've never seen her like this and it scares of losing her.

Once I'm close enough, I grab onto her hand after sitting on the seat near the bed; seeing that she's just staring at me—something showing in her eyes. We're both thinking of something and it's too painful.

''I'm glad you're okay,'' I kiss onto her forehead, long and full of meanings. I'm more than glad that she's okay because I don't know what I'd do if I lose her.

All of a sudden, she starts to tear up. Both of her eyes are teary before the tears are actually streaming down her cheeks; making me wipe away with my thumb as I stand, trying to comfort her. Trying to soothe her pain because it's hurting me, too. We're hurting.

''This is all my fault,'' She says, voice breaking.

I frown, ''No. Don't say that, please,'' I reply.

Without me realising, tears have streamed down my cheeks but I immediately wipe them away; wanting to show how I'm strong enough to face this when I'm not so that she can face it too

Without me realising, tears have streamed down my cheeks but I immediately wipe them away; wanting to show how I'm strong enough to face this when I'm not so that she can face it too. We'll face it.

It's very impossible for us to move on but we'll try.

Minutes have passed of her cries breaking the silence yet I show no signs of stopping her. She can cry it all out because her sadness is mine, too. Tears keep on falling down my cheeks and I don't bother wiping them away—this is just too much to bare.

Days before all of this disaster started to happen, we were very excited for our baby even though we knew that it'd be a long journey. We didn't mind.

My heart clenches at the memory, weeks ago:

''We don't even know the gender, yet.'' I say, looking at the clothes that mother has picked out. She has been truly excited about her upcoming grandchild that she went to shop for newborn clothing.

''That's why I've bought white in almost everything so that when the two of you find out about the baby's gender, it'll be fine. White fits a baby boy or a baby girl,'' She replies as she smiles widely at Emma.

''Right. Thank you,'' Emma mutters as she snuggles closer towards me; while I place my hand on her baby bump—our child is growing in there and I can't wait to see the beauty that she or he will become.

''I love you,'' She whispers as she snuggles.

''I love you, more.'' I say back, smiling.

We wouldn't be far from sixteen weeks pregnant but I guess the counting has stopped. Both of my arms are wrapping soothingly around her body, trying my best to calm her down so that she'll be okay.

Even, if she's still hurting, at least she'll be okay.

''I want our baby, Emery.'' She breathes, her cries are slowing down as she tries to control her breathing. My heart breaks at the sight of her wet cheeks and her swollen red eyes because it feels like I'm not capable of doing anything; I feel hopeless, somehow.

''Me too,'' I mutter as she snuggles closer.

''I'm not strong,'' She cries out.

Neither am I, sweetheart. Neither of us.

I've never realised that I would be facing this kind of pain especially not now—when we were both happy about our first child. Things are completely different from what we expected and it's slowly, killing us deeply inside that it's impossible for us to breathe properly.

Where should I turn? How?

Losing my child is an unbearable pain but seeing my wife, crying her soul out and breaking apart feels like being stabbed multiple times; I've vowed to be there for her, care and love her but why does it feel like I'm only bringing us misery?

We'll make it through this pain. Probably not tomorrow or next week and even next year but we'll make it through—this will be a part of our memory, a memory that we shall always remember because it makes us strong. We'll be able to face other.

''We'll be okay,'' I whisper, soothingly.

''We're going to be okay,'' I repeat.

If only I'm capable of showing the amount of sadness, I'd be falling onto the ground with nothing holding me back but I have to be strong for her. She has to see that I'll do anything for and only her.

I close my eyes and continue to let the tears stream down my cheeks, making me try hard to hold back the sobs and the aching pain in my chest but it's hard.