Chapter 12

There is a potion called the Memoria Siltarae.

The liquid named after Memo Ria, a scholar who established the concept of memory, had an amazing effect of organizing memory just by drinking it.

It brings back fading memories and organizes them in the right order. Therefore, it was a potion equivalent to holy water for those with memory-related diseases.

Because it’s a famous magic potion, I also knew its existence since childhood.

I once thought about obtaining one because I was reincarnated in a book’s world. Nevertheless, I gave up the idea of getting the potion for number of reasons.

First, I was not sure if the function of the potion would be applied to the memory of my previous life. The past life story was considered crazy here, too.

Second, I can’t bring back memories that I don’t have at all—such as the unread part of a book—and it didn’t seem to be of much help to remember the details of a love story.

And third, the most crucial reason is that the potion is too expensive.

As the second daughter of a Marquis, my personal fortune is quite huge, but I had to give up half of my assets to get a Memoria Siltarae.

The potion was really bitter.

I would rather be Nocton’s dog than pay the money for that thing.

Thinking that way, I forgot about the potion, but under the present circumstances I had no choice.

“Are you sure you’re alright? My lady? It’s presumptous of me to say, but the price of the potion is really….”

“Just get it for me, it’s alright. And please keep it a secret from my parents. Alroy, too.”

“But little lady….”

The old butler, Duvel, drew the words with a dubious look.

But if you do not know the reason, it was a request for too much money.

Even if it’s not the Marquisate’s property but my own personal, it’s still from the family of his master. It is normal for a servant to stop his master from buying a potion by shaking off half of her assets.

Because that’s what I expected, I brought up the reason I had prepared in advance.

“Only you know this, Duvel. Actually, I drank a little at the ballroom last time. Aaron took me there and went to work. I didn’t know he’d come back.”

“What? Then don’t tell me….”

“That’s right, I think I made a mistake, but I can’t remember.”

A sigh cane out from the depths of the lungs. Needless to say, this was a serious matter.

“It wouldn’t have been a big deal. The little lady was fine when I greeted you.”

“It’s … I fell asleep in the carriage. But when I woke up, Aaron’s face was blue and I couldn’t remember anything. I need to know what’s going on in order to handle it, but I can’t even ask the person involved.”

It was easy to make Aaron as an excuse.

The old butler was a supporter of the youngest lady of the mansion and the white knight together for a smooth marriage.

“Please, Duvel. If my parents found out, I would be in a lot of trouble. I don’t even know what I did before I got married. Keep it a secret. Can you do that?”

I held Duvel’s hand, whose face was shaking, and said with an earnest look.

I’ve seen him since I was a baby, and he was very weak with me and Alroy.

Moments later, Duvel nodded with a grim expression and left the room.

The next time Valrose’s loyal butler shows up, he’ll somehow obtain the Memories Siltarae.

Solving my pitiful expression, I let out a sigh once more.

“Oh, that’s a waste of money.”

But now that I’ve heard it from Alice, it’s what I have to do.

I buried myself on the couch and looked out the window.

In the blue-drenched sky, the dense clouds were crawling slowly.

It was late at night, and Alice’s words about Nocton Edgar were too shocking to hear.

How come Alice’s dreams know so much about Nocton? Since when she can do it and what else did she knows?

It would have been the same for anyone, not just me. Although I was aware that I was born in a novel, but if the main character is a villain, it’s shocking enough to change the genre.

I didn’t entirely believe Alice. However, Nocton’s impression is not entirely the same as before.

I’ve been agonizing over what’s going on, but I got no results. In the end, I had to search my memory properly for a possible answer.

Perhaps the worst thing that would happen is that it costs a lot of money and no outcome.

But I’m sure it means something to try.

I had many things to do.

It wasn’t about Memoria Siltarae, but I had to go visit Alice again … and Nocton, too.

I felt heavy with fatigue.

✴️✴️✴️

“Nocton.”

On the rainy day, Nocton was in his study as usual.

The fireplace was lit with firewood, and sometimes the fire flared up like a star.

On the couch made of buffalo-leather, Nocton was reading a thick book in an upright posture with no disarray. Although he might have heard it, it was only until the end of the book that Nocton approached me.

“Hello, Valrose.”

“Why didn’t you come to my birthday party? You told me you’d come.”

“Well, I don’t remember saying that.”

“But I’m sure—!”

“I told you I’d think about it. I didn’t say I was going, Valrose.”

Yeah, I knew you’d say that.

I knew from the time I asked if he would come on my birthday, from the moment he answered that he would think about it, or before I actually gave him an invitation.

I must be a fool if I didn’t know.

Because this wasn’t the first time it’s happening.

The fire spread through my heart even though I was expecting it, so I stared at him with all my might.

“Nothing happened. You can’t come to the party, you can’t contact me back … there’s nothing special happened, right?”

“Special … if it were yesterday, there was nothing special about it other than your birthday.”

“Yes. I thought so.”

“You know why.”

“Of course, it’s not surprising. I must look very strange to you.”

It’s the same every year that you didn’t come to my birthday anyway, and you never invited me to your birthday.

It wasn’t because I didn’t remember the last year that I did the same thing every year.

It was a year ago, but it might be different this year

I thought we were a little closer, I felt a little friendlier, but when I asked him more, he widened the distance.

Yeah, it’s not that hard to figure out.

Because the way he called me was still revealing his distance.

“Valrose?”

Yeah, that’s the good-natured Valrose.

Even the person who I met two or three times calls me Roa, but Nocton calls me with my last name.

I don’t know if he’s trying to distance himself, or thinking that the one he’s dealing with is the second daughter of Marquis Valrose, not Roa.

The heat in my eyes gave me strength to glare at Nocton.

“Not just that. When you need a partner in a ballroom where you’re supposed to attend, unless it’s time to look good in the face of friendly relations, not even once! When I say I need a partner, I’m not even interested asking someone else for a partner!”

Nocton Edgar looked at me with a rare, rather absent-minded expression.

My pride was hurt and I never cried, and that must be embarrassing of me.

Whether it was laughing or crying, I always thought I’d turn the face inside out with an ugly look, but there was an unexpected human aspect.

And I’m annoyed.

“If I didn’t come to the Edgar’s mansion, we won’t have to run into each other. I knew it’s too late, Nocton, but you’ve never come to my house before.”

“…”

“I thought you were a friend.”

“So … what do you want me to say?”

“I don’t want you to say anything. It’s just….”

As the tears began to fall, I rubbed my eyes roughly with the back of my hand.

“Fuck you.”

✴️✴️✴️

Crash!

I must have fallen asleep.

The sudden sound of thunder caused me to stir up my body.

I swept my swollen chest and looked out of the window.

As in the dream, the rain poured down like a waterfall, the yellow lights flashed through the raindrops, and soon a loud thunderbolt followed.

The weather was the same as that day.

Maybe that’s why I had a dream about it.

It was not pleasant to think of something I had forgotten. It’s not a big deal now, but I was very angry at the time.

That’s because it’s the end of the delusion that Nocton considers me special.

There were many times when I wished and expected.

Now. I don’t expect anything from him.

I sighed and found myself still buried on the couch.

I’m in this position? Who’s seen it? I didn’t want to pay much attention to other people’s eyes, but my parents were so noble that I would hear another scolding if the story went on.

Fortunately, nothing was very unusual except for the slightly distorted appearance.

However, I felt stiff because my body is weak.

With a long sigh, I stretched around and cleaned up my messy outfit.

Then, there was a knock.

Come to think of it, it’s lunchtime, the time when Sadie, my personal maid, usually come.

“Come in, Sadie.”

I spoke without a thought, looking out the window and heard the door open.

Crash! It thundered again.

The rainy season is almost over, but it’s raucous, I got worried about my parents who went outside again today.

They won’t get struck by lightning, right?

It was an useless concern, and the thought of it raises my anxiety.

Well, it’s not like I’m the one with all the escorts or anything. It’s not gonna hurt to get some rain if there’s no storm, but the emotions won over the reasoning.

“Sadie, when did the two say they would be back?”

“I’m sorry, but it’s not Sadie.”

Surprised by the voice from behind, I turned my head away. The low sound was certainly not the voice of my personal maid, yet it was a familiar voice.

“Hello, Valrose. You don’t hate to see me, do you?”

Why did I realize now, if it was Sadie who really came in, she wouldn’t be waiting for my response without saying anything.

It used to be a stunning familiar face, but has become surprisingly unfamiliar lately.

I had no choice but to stare at a face I had never seen before in the Marquis Valrose’s residence.

Next to the door, Nocton Edgar stood smiling.