Chapter 41 - Drop Offs And Fear.

Ford. 

Patrick. 

Is this how Lance felt when he saw me with Lisa?

I watch them, they are conversing. Words that are meaningless to me make me upset.

"This is my neighbour turned good friend Patrick," Lance points to him. this is his introduction. 

I don't want to be the jealous boyfriend but the way Patrick is looking at lance is getting on my nerves. I know that look, he knows what he is doing. Almost like he wants me to see it. He wants me to know how he feels about him. Lance seems oblivious, he is proud to show off his friend. 

With a frown, I take his hands in mine for a handshake. I don't want to do or say anything to upset him. 

"You might not remember me from last night." I crease my brows in confusion as I let go of his hand "You know, at the bar. I helped put you in bed, ruined my shoes." 

My heart stops in my chest. He was with Lance yesterday. So he saw me at that state. Fucking hell. 

"He's messing around," Lance hits his shoulder playfully and this gets a brighter smile from Patrick my new sworn enemy. I don't get the joke, I don't find him charming, one bit. 

"I'll go bring the car around, get to know each other." Lance walks away from us without even waiting for an agreement from me. 

I don't want to get to know Patrick. I already hate him. 

We stand there, I remain quiet. He coughs nervously "So you guys settle things?" he declares.

I frown "We never had anything to settle." 

I won't give him the chance to make small talk, or get any insight to our relationship. 

"Oh…. cool, cool."

"What do you want from Lance. I can see the way you look at him." I accuse him in the form of a question. 

The smug smile remains on his face "How do I look at him?" 

I don't know this guy but I can already tell that I don't like him. he is gloating right now. He knows that I can tell and he wants me to know. He wants to get to my skin and it is working. 

Fuck, I hate this. 

"You have feelings for him," I state. 

He laughs heartily "You can tell this from a look?" 

"You might have him fooled but I see right through you." 

He walks closer to me with the fucking smile still plastered to his face. I want to slap that smile off his face so bad "What do you want to do about it?"

"Stay away from him," I warn him. it is unfair to do this kind of thing when I still have Lisa lingering around but I am a jealous person. I don't like to share my man. Lance is mine, I don't want this guy lingering around, tempting him. 

A black Camaro drives by and stops in front of us and Lance peeks out through the window smiling "Get in. Patrick, ill stop by later." He winks and i frown. Stop by later? 

What the fuck. 

Patrick nods and I watch him say goodbye to lance. the anger boiling within me. Lance might not see it or he might pretend not to see it but it is clear to me. I don't want to say something in case it upsets him. I don't want to remind him of all the flaws I have. Jealousy would be an addition to my imperfections. 

"Are you okay?" he notices on our drive to my house. 

I manage a nod.

He frowns "You know I can tell something is wrong," he glances at me with a preppy smile "Spit it out boyfriend," he adds. 

A smile crawls to my face "I don't like Patrick."

The part of me that wants to be completely honest with him blurts it out. I don't want to show this insecure side of me but I also want to be completely transparent with him.

He smiles "He is nothing more than a friend to me."

I nod "I know but he wants more." I tell him from all the things I noticed.

"I know." My eyes shoot up to him at his words, he looks at me for a second before he continues ��I can tell that much but he also knows how much you mean to me. he knows that I will never feel the same way about him." 

Instantly, his words make me feel better. I don't want that guy to find a way to Lance's heart. With the problems we have to face in our relationship, it will be pretty easy for him to sway. Being with Patrick might be easier, he might get frustrated with me. he might let go of what we have when he gets a taste of something better. 

"You're overthinking again. You are the most important person in my life. think about how hard it was to convince you to be mine. Do you think I'd do that if this wasn't real?" 

He reminds me. 

Just yesterday, I thought I had lost him and now he is my boyfriend. I plan to keep him, for a very long time. 

"I love you Brad or is it, Ford? Why did you tell me your name was Ford when you are a Brad?" he blurts out.

I smile at the randomness of the question. 

"Ford is my middle name. I really wanted to be someone else when I met you. I didn't want to be Brad." 

"Who is Brad?" 

"Brad is a coward; he is scared of everything. He does what he is told. He isn't brave enough to be who he is." 

He sighs "Who is Ford."

I smile brightly "Ford is Lance's boyfriend." 

*****************

I say goodbye to Lance and walk into the house. Father is waiting for me in the living room. I don't know what this is about, but I know it is nothing good. There is a grim expression on his face, almost like I am about to be scolded. 

"Have a seat." he directs me. 

I obey him because today is not the day to have any issues. I am still floating around my bubble. I am still in the world of Lance and nothing will ruin it for me. 

"Where have you been?"

I furrow my brows in confusion. When did he start asking about my whereabouts? 

"What is this about?" 

He glares at me in a 'you don't want to test my patience' way. This is what he does. He always finds something to complain about. I always end up doing something that he doesn't approve of.

"I was with Lance," I tell him honestly because I know Mary will tell him. there is no way she wouldn't gloat about the fact that her son is getting along with his. 

"You're drinking again." He ignores my honesty. 

"No, I'm not." I lie. 

I don't want him to know. I don't want him to lock me up again. 

"You're lying." He reaches for an envelope on the table next to him and my heart stops in my chest. He throws the envelope to me and I grab it before it falls to the floor. I already know what it entails but I still open it. 

Pictures. 

So many pictures. 

Of me. 

At different bars. 

Walking out. 

Drunk out of my fucking ass. 

I run my hands through my hair because I don't know what to say. There is nothing I can say. He caught me, he actually had someone follow me this time. He has never stooped so low. 

"I can explain."

He stands up from the chair and my heart beats in my chest, terrified. I don't know what he is going to do with this information. This disappointment will make him lash out.

I have to expect the worst. 

"I am getting married in a week and you pull this stunt so close to my wedding." His voice is so calm and collected. 

If I didn't know him better, I would think he actually cares about me. "I promise, this is not like the last time." 

He frowns "Are you still taking your meds?" 

I nod.

It is a lie. 

"I am giving you a week. Trust me, you can't hide it from me. if I find out that you are still drinking. I will lock you up again." He walks out of the room after laying that threat and I release a breath of relief. He is being lenient because of his wedding. 

I look at my hands and they are shaking profusely. 

The fear I gave for this man is too much to handle. My phone beeps in my pocket and I grab it for a distraction. Sure enough, the message displayed on the screen brings a smile to my face. I forget about my dad, I forget about all my fear, all my problems. 

I love you, Ford.