Chapter 111 - Show Your True Self

Lance.

The drive home is nerve-wracking. I don't know what is going on and my mind is amess. This is all my doing. I am the one that went ahead to talk to my mom even though Ford said I should wait and now I have to bear the consequences of my actions.

I panic all through the drive, not having a clue on what is happening. so I know she talked to John. Just like she said she would but what was I even thinking. This thing could escalate. It is not like I have any plans on telling her about me and Ford. She is married to his father. There is no way she will accept this.

Now my plan on telling her feels stupid.

Ford is going to be pissed at me.

I get the house and George looks at me through the rearview mirror. That usual blank expression that he has on his face is plastered. I raise a brow at him ''How good of a mood was your boss?'' I ask curious to know the situation of things. If he Is upset then I know things have gone south. This is all my fault, what was the point of telling her, what did I think she would do for me?

He shrugs through the mirror ''Same as he usually is.''

I sigh loudly because that is of no help to me. John is a pretender, from all I know, I haven't seen his true side and I think my mom hasn't either.

I get down from the car without another word. There is nothing more to say. I guess I will find out when I get to the house. Once inside, everywhere is quiet as it usually is. So I have to look around for them. I find mom first, in the kitchen. She smiles widely when she sees me and grabs my arm as she gets closer ''I fixed things. You are going to be so proud of me.'' she praises herself.

I don't know what she thinks she has done but I doubt she fixed anything. If anything, she has probably stirred the pot.

''What did you do?'' I ask wanting to know what I am getting myself into. If she went as far as to mention Ford then I know we are in big trouble.

''I told him how you felt. I needed to know if he has a problem with you,'' she beams.

I raise a brow ''And?''

Still smiling ''He wants to talk to you. Assure you that he doesn't care that you're gay. He is a great guy.'' She blushes already daydreaming about him.

God, she is so in love that she has no fucking clue.

''Did you mention Ford?'' I ask wanting to know if he is involved in this.

I see the guilty ridden expression on her face before she says anything. Fuck, fuck, fuck. She promised me that she wouldn't. God, not right now.

''Mom,'' I scold her.

I push her hand away from my arm but she is quick to grab unto it again ''Hear me out. I had to mention him. He Needed to know the lies his son has been telling.''

Lies.

What the fuck is she saying?

''He didn't lie. How could you do this?''

Ford is going to be pissed at me.

He told me not to say anything and I have messed things up, just because I decided to trust my fucking mother.

''Look, there are things about Brad that you don't know. His father explained everything to me, and he wants to do the same to you. Just give John a chance.''

She is pleading with me to trust the man she loves but Ford is the only one I trust. He is the only one I can rely on in this family. No one is going to convince me about anything.

''I am not doing this. I told you not to say anything. How can I trust you again?''

She sighs, obviously hurt from my words but I don't give a fuck. I don't know how to make things right and now I am lashing out. She deserves this. How could she do this to me?

''That is unfair.''

I scoff ''I begged you not to tell him and you did the opposite. After promising me.'' I am yelling. I don't know how else to react to this. This is probably the fear talking. With what I have done, I might have well have pushed Ford to his dad.

Fuck.

''Calm down, this is not a problem. John isn't even upset.''

Oh, to you he isn't. what about when Ford gets back. How will he react to this?

''Mom, I am not having this discussion with him. I regret even mentioning it to you in the first place because now you have ruined everything.''

''Lance, this is not as big a deal as you are making it. Brad is sick. He is a pathological liar. You don't even know the half of it.''

Wow.

Now he Is even making it seem like all this is happening because of his disorder. I know for a fact that Ford never lies. He keeps things away from me, yes. but he does that so he doesn't have to lie to me. now John is telling her that he is

''I know he is sick but that doesn't have anything to do with what you did.''

She sighs, this time letting go of me. this is all my fault. I am the one that caused this encounter and now, knowing this, I know that she will never be on my side. She will never accept me and Ford together.

''Lance I need you to calm down for a second. You are overreacting right now and I don't even know why.''

She doesn't know why because she doesn't know anything. She is in her own happy bubble. Newly married and she sees the man as an angel. I haven't seen the bad sides to him but I know that they are there. From the things, Ford has told me. He was going to kill himself to get the fuck away from that man. Obviously, there is more to him than she is seeing and now I thought I could trust her by opening up to her. I shouldn't have.

''Mom, can we forget about this. tell him I lied or something. I don't want to involve Ford in this. he will not forgive me.''

''I can't do that. I want you to see that he loves you. This is not just about our marriage. He wants you as a son.''

Has she gone mad?

Love me?

''He doesn't even fucking know me. how can he love me?''

She smiles ''He wants to get to know you.''

She is doing this for her own selfish reasons. This is not even about me, or Ford. This is about her marriage and wanting things to ve cool between us. this has nothing to do with me and I should've known better than to confide in her.

''I don't want to get to know him. I hate him.''

That is the most sincere I have been with her all through this conversation. I actually hate him. I hate that he is Ford's father. I hate the way he treats his only son. I hate that he just had to marry my mother. I hate that he is in my life. God, I fucking hate him so much.

''You don't mean that.''

I shake my head ''I do. I will never be part of this family. Once I am old enough, I will leave and you will never see me again.''

Tears well up in her eyes. This is the harshest I have ever been with her. I don't do these kinds of things to her. I want to feel the guilt of my words but I am clouded by fear and anger. The fact that this is happening and it is all my fault.

''Now that is not a nice thing to say to your mother.''

We both turn to the direction of the voice and John stands in front of the kitchen door with a frown on his face. This is the first time I have ever seen him look so serious. He always tries to have a smile on his face when he is interacting with me but now he seems pissed.

Come on boy, show your true self.

I want to rile him up, make her see the real him.

''It is none of your business,'' I tell him blatantly.

He walks closer to us and mom sniffs out her tears ''don't mind him, honey, he is just upset.''

She is trying to defend me. I don't need her help. I am fucking fine on my own. I cross my arms over my chest ''I am not upset. I just don't give a fuck about you john.'' I inform him rudely.

The frown on his face wipes away and then a smile forms slowly as he stops in front of me and mom. ''Lance, stop this right now.'��� She warns me.

I shake my head.

I am going to show her that he is not such a good person.. I want him to show her who he really is right now.