Chapter 112 - Blinded By Love

Lance.

''You are lashing out,'' he says calmly.

I don't want him to ve calm but it seems like he can see through me. he knows that is what I am doing and he is not going to let me win.

''I am not.'' I try to walk away from this but he grabs me a little too rough as he pulls me back into the kitchen.

''I am not done talking to you.''

I roll my eyes, ignoring the pain he is inflicting right now ''This is a family matter. It doesn't have anything to do with you.''

I have never truly accepted him as my family. Maybe it is because of the fact that I don't want him to be my stepdad because I am in love with his son but he should've known by now that I don't see him as part of my family.

''I understand how you feel.''

He is being too calm, I can feel his anger from the tight grip on my arm but mom cant see it ''You are fucking hurting me,'' I nudge my arm out of his grip. He smiles calmly, not giving in to all I am doing. This is going to be very hard. John has a great poker face. he knows how to act around her and that is why he has been deceived into this marriage.

''Can I have a word with you in private?'' he asks.

''I don't have anything to say to you.'' My tone is as harsh as I can muster. This is not easy for me. yes, I am so fucking upset right now but I don't like to give into anger. That is not who I am but I have to do this to show her what kind of man she married. I know at the end of this all, Ford and I will seem like the bad guys. They got married and we want to be a couple. No one will understand but the fact that his father is such a monster scares the hell out of me.

''I just want to explain things to you. Give me a couple of minutes and hear me out.'' If I didn't know better, I would believe him right now.

I turn to face mom and she has tears in her eyes. I hate being the reason for her tears but I guess that is the person I have become. This is all too much for me. maybe running away with him is for the best. I cant handle all this.

''Okay,'' I decide to give in to his demands. It looks like I don't even have a choice in this matter. My phone vibrates in my pocket and for a second my heart stops in fear that it is Ford. If I answer, he will be able to tell that something is wrong. I know I have to tell him about this encounter. I did this without his consent and I have caused a big problem that would definitely involve him.

Is he even going to forgive me?

I bring it out of my pocket. All eyes are still on me so I have to tread carefully. Seeing Patrick's name on the Id makes my nerves calm down ''I need to take this,'' I tell him waving my phone in the air.

John smiles almost like he doesn't mind.

I see right through you mister.

You won't get me on your side.

''I'll be in my study. Will you meet me after your call?'' he asks.

I nod and he walks out of the kitchen. Mom is still watching me but she is very quiet. I don't know what this means but I know she is not happy with me. I have been rude to her and husband today and I doubt she would just let it slide like that.

After my call, I end up getting worried about Jack. I try his number and it goes to voicemail. Unlike Patrick, I know what could have happened. Jack's father is not the best person in the world. He is verbally and physically abusive. That is why he stays away from his apartment most times. The fact that Patrick is now involved means he is going to find out today. I am glad to be that push that will bring them closer. Somehow, I like them together. They seem like the perfect coupe and unlike me and Ford, their barriers are not unbeatable. Not that I think our barriers are unbeatable. It is just harder for us.

''Go and see him,'' Mom interrupts me with a sigh.

Her eyes are blank now, the hurt somehow seems to have vanished. I want to apologise to her but I am not in that place yet. I am still upset with her. I trusted her and she broke that trust. If I am unable to talk to her then what is the point. The way she handled it isn't what I wanted. I wanted her to believe me. be wary of him. watch him closely.

''Let me guess because we are a fucking family?''

Her eyes open from how crass I am being right now. She is the only one I am angry with. I don't know John; I don't give a fuck about him, but she is my world and now I don't think I belong in my world anymore.

''You are being very terrible right now. What did I do to deserve this?''

Okay, she didn't do anything. It is not like she knows what she has done wrong, but I have no one else to be pissed at. She is blinded by him. he is the only one that is right in her eyes. The fact that she can just accept that Ford is a liar when she knows nothing about it breaks my heart.

''You are not fucking listening,'' I shout so loud that she sighs again.

''Watch your language, Lance. I am still your mother.''

''Then fucking act like my mother. You are conforming to him and his life that you don't even see it.'' that is the truth. Her love for him is blinding her and I don't think she even knows that it is happening.

''You are being unfair. What is making you so angry?''

I can't tell her why I am so upset.

''Ford is my friend. he is important to me and now you are saying he is a pathological liar when you don't even know him.''

''You don't know him either. You just met him. his father has known him all his life.''

That man knows nothing about his son.

I can't say that because more things will come out and I have already done enough. Ford will never forgive me if I say more than this.

''I know him. he is my friend. we have been honest with each other all this while. He told me something in secret and now you have made it public. Thank you for that mother.''

''There is more to this. there is something you are not telling me.'' there is a suspicious look on her face as those words leave her lips.

''I have told you everything.''

She sighs ''Did you ever trust me? Do you think I wouldn't be able to handle the truth?''

That is it. I know now for a fact that she can't handle the truth. She will never accept me and him together. She loves John too much to do that. He has become the most important person to her and there is nothing I can do about that.

''You will never see it. as long as he doesn't show you his real self,'' And with those words, I walk away from her and to the direction of the study. I want to get this over with. I don't want to prolong this to the point where Ford will be involved.

I get to the door of the study and knock gently. Whatever he says today. I will not believe him. the only person I am going to believe in is Ford. He is the only one that matters. No matter how much he tries to convince me that he is the good guy.

I will not listen.

''Come in,'' I hear his voice through the other side of the door.

Once I enter, I see him seated in front of his desk with that same blank expression. I don't know what he wants to talk about but I am already scared of the outcome of this conversation.

''Have a seat son.''

My skin crawls at the word. I am not his son, I will never be his son. Even though his words irritate me, I oblige and sit down in front of him. slowly, a smile forms on his face as he parts his lips open ''I see that my son has made me out to be the bad guy.''

It is not a question, it is more of a statement. Ford hasn't done anything. It is not like he goes around bad-mouthing the guy.

''I am going to share some things with you and I am sure by the end of this conversation, you will see things clearer.''