Chapter 169 - Worry

Lance.

Lance this is your mother. I need you to answer put on your phone. 

Lance. 

Please just pick up. 

It keeps saying unavailable. 

I will never forgive you for this. 

I am your mother. 

I am sorry. 

I love you. I am worried. 

Please come home. John won't keep him from you again. He is on your side.

I scroll through all the Facebook messages on my laptop. I don't even understand anymore. I don't know what to do. I am confused and terrified. Maybe running away wasn't the best idea. At that moment, that was all I wanted to do. Get him out of the hospital and show him how much I loved him and trusted him.

He didn't have anyone on his corner and I wanted to be that. I wanted to be right there next to him but now, everything is fucked up. I let him go to the pharmacy. Okay, I can't say it like that. Saying I let him go just means that he is a prisoner all over again. I trust that he will be back, I trust that he will be fine.

When he mentioned the medicine that he needed, it just showed me how much I could trust him. He knows that he needs the meds, so he told me about it. Yeah, I have been overthinking everything. I am worried that something will happen to him on his way back. We checked google maps. The nearest pharmacy is just a couple of minutes away. There is no plan, I don't know what we are going to do. I haven't figures out what is next.

I don't know what the plan is and he doesn't seem to know wither. We can't keep staying at this hotel. Yeah, he got his money from the bank but we need a plan. We have to go back to school. We need to have a life.

Can I call you?

I see a message from Jack. The only reason why I came on Facebook in the first place. I thought I would be able to hide from mom but she has stalked me on all platforms. I had to deactivate my Instagram account and now she is on Facebook, messaging me with different emotions.

Sure. 

I reply jack immediately. My phone has been off since the day he scared me and told me that John could be tracking us. He video calls me immediately.

The minute I see his face, I feel relief "It is good to see you man,'' I mutter.

He chuckles and leans closer to the camera. He squints his eyes and the smile on his face is goofy "Your mother has been all over my shit lately. When are you going to come back, man? I can't handle anymore of it.'' he cries into the screen. This gets a laugh out of me. I knew she would be all over him because deep down she must know that he knows where I am. He is my best friend, hence why I would tell him.

"Don't mind her. She has sent me so many messages, I have lost count.'' I try to brush off the talk about her. "How are you, how is Patrick?'' I go on to more important things. I feel like shit for the way I am treating her but I can't think about that right now. This is my life. At the end of it all, I will die and I want to make sure I have to regrets. If I didn't get Ford out of there, I would've had so many regrets. Now that he is with me, now that he is close, I know that we will be fine. There are moments when I have doubts when I worry but I trust him more than anything.

"We're good. Nothing is the same without you,'' he leans backwards and I get a closer look at his environment. He is still in Patrick's apartment. It seems like he is living there now.

"Seems like you have moved in with your boyfriend,'' I tease.

He rolls his eyes "I haven't moved in. it is still too soon." He denies it even though to me, it seems like he has all but moved in.

"Whatever dude. Pretty soon you will have all your things in his house and there will be no going back." I inform him because I know how these things go. He is trying to take the relationship slow and I get that. Why rush when you have the rest of your life together but in the end, their relationship isn't that conventional. They started off in love instantly. It wasn't a dating kind of situation and their lives are not that easy as the normal person. They have a lot of baggage and they need each other more than anything. So I don't think it is too soon to move in together.

In fact, it is not soon enough.

"Where's Ford?'' he asks curiously.

"He went to the pharmacy,'' I tell him casually because I don't want to look like I am worried about him. He can handle going to the pharmacy on his own.

"Oh, alone?'' he mumbles almost like he doesn't want me to hear him.

I nod "yeah, we kind of forgot one of his medicines but he has handled how to get it,'' I assure him because I know Jack is as worried as I am. He raises a brow in suspicion "Do you think he can actually handle it right now?'' he asks.

I nod.

He sighs "I think he is not in the right frame of mine Lance. I mean, you saw the way he was when we got him out of the hospital. It has just been a couple of days. I don't think you should be letting him be on his own right now.''

I thought about it and I didn't want to let him go but if I told him not to, he would've thought that I didn't trust him. He would think I think he is crazy.

"I can't keep him locked up forever, h—" he interrupts me "You need to keep an eye on him. For now at least." He adds.

His tone is firm. He is right but I don't know how to do that. Ford has been good on his own. Even though his father has kept him on a tight leash. He has been able to survive for this long with his demons. He doesn't need me watching him like a hawk.

"I can't do that to him, treat him like his father did. There is no way he will appreciate that,'' I tell him honestly. I have been thinking of ways to handle the situation and all I know is that this is not the right way. He needs to feel normal. That is the only way he will get over all this.

"I am not saying you should ostracize him, I just think he shouldn't be walking the streets alone right now.'' the door opens abruptly and I jump off my seat like I was caught doing something. Ford raises a brow as he walks into the room. He has a bag on his grip.

"Ford is here,'' I announce guiltily.

Jack looks to his direction and waves slowly "Hey dude,'' he shouts through the computer. I take a deep breath hoping that he didn't hear any of that. He doesn't need this right now. He doesn't need to doubt himself any more.

"Hi," he drops the bag on the bed and walks over to me, bending so that he can see my friend clearly "How are you?'' he manages calmly. He looks a little weird but I can't pinpoint what is wrong.

"I'm good. We miss you guys a lot. Who would have thought that I would be using Facebook of all things to video call?" He chortles jokingly.

I smile because you have to give it to Jack, he knows how to lighten the mood. My eyes stay fixed on Ford as they converse and it doesn't seem like he heard. He is acting like he has been all this while. So there is no proof that he overheard our conversation.

After I end the call with Jack I ask him "Did you succeed?''

He nods his head with a faint smile. It seems a little fake to me. I can almost tell that there is something he is not telling me. There are a lot of things that I can't ask him. A lot of things that I should be able to ask him but I can't. Like why he seems off right now. The fact that he just told me that he got the meds that he needed but it really doesn't seem like he is happy about it.

I get up from the chair and walk over to the bag but he is quick to grab it from me. Another thing that is suspicious but I can't say anything about it.

I don't know what to do.