Chapter 146 - Guilt

I was so busy this whole week, I'm preparing for my finals and all I can do the whole time was to review. This is the last and I'm moving forward on my 4th year life.

There's a pressure of course. Knowing that I'll be more busy because of my internship and also for my work.

My mom asked me to stop working and she'll provide our needs as the best as she can, but I can't let her do that. I was working all my life and I know how to manage my time and save my energy. She doesn't have to worry about it anymore.

Jennie was also serious about her studies, this is the second time that I saw her like this. The first one was their proposal before. She doesn't want to neglect her studies as much as possible, because her dad was expecting her to be the best as she's the future heir of their company.

And also Marco was forced to do his best to passed the subjects.. I have never saw him got interested with our course. He said that he wanted to take the fine arts but his family doesn't want him to be.

It's just sad that he can't even do what he wants, because there are many people who forbids it..

"I've never seen you this serious, are you really my best friend?"

Sam was eating some popcorn on my bed. She's bored and now she's bugging me here. Her father spoils her too much that she's here everyday. Is that an advantage of having a rich parents?

Although, I still can't concentrate to what I'm doing. I keep biting my lips like I wanted to ask her about it. My head was aching too much that I can't seem to find the answer.

I glanced at Sam who's still busy with her phone while eating her popcorn.

"Hey! You spilling it on my bed!" I shouted.

"Oh. Sorry!" She made a peace sign and picked up the popcorns.

"Aren't you going to your unit? You're always here!"

She held her chest. Acting so hurt.

"Why? You don't want me here? You're hurting me Raine," She's about to cry now.

"Alright! Alright! Stay here whatever you want!" I rolled my eyes. "What a pest!"

"Hey, I heard that!"

I laughed. I didn't know that she can still hear my whispers. Oh god.

"I have a problem.." I bit my lower lip.

The urge to mutter it was consuming every part of me. Her help was the prime reason why I wanted to tell it to her.

"You can tell me your thoughts,"

She stood up and sat on the edge of my bed. She's still eating her popcorn like a hungry cat.

I can't even find the words to say now.. Geez..

"Em.."

I don't know how to start it. Damn it!

"Noah went to our school on the acquaintance party.. "

Her nails crumpled on my bed and her eyes locked on me. The anger flashes through her eyes which made me feel really busted.

"What?"

Her eyes flared up and all I can do is to looked away. I know what she's thinking. And she's wrong with that. I have no feelings for him anymore.

"What did he say to you? Is that why you're out of the world this past few days?" Her brows furrowed.

"He said that my mom called him and it's bothering me what is that all about. He can't tell it to me.." I bit my lower lip.

It's actually bugging me everytime, I just don't want to make it too obvious when my friends are around but Sam didn't buy it.

"Why would your mom call him?"

"Exactly! Why would she call him right? It's so strange.."

I really need to talk to my mom now. She already knows what Noah did to me and I didn't want her to be associated with him anymore.

Whatever her excuses are, just make sure that it won't affect our relationship.

That day, I went to North Cascades since it's weekend. I asked Sam to just tell it to our friends because I don't think I can wait until they come home.

My curiosity was killing me.

Sam also offered to drive me there but I didn't want to disturb her vacation so I just took a train all the way there. The ride was so long that I even got bored. I have no one to talk to, so I just listened to music and sleep.

I arrived in our house at exactly 5 pm. My siblings hugged me as soon as I reached our door which I missed the most. They looked more mature now and I'll have to tip-toed just to hugged them back. My brothers are grown up now.

"W-why did you c-come..here? Is there a-any problem?" My mom looked surprised when she saw me.

I remembered that I didn't tell her that I'm coming.

But that's fine since I always come here without telling them.

Drake placed my bag inside my room and Sebastian was here beside me. He's still clingy as always. I hope he won't ever change.

We headed towards the living room, I'm planning to tell it to her once we sat on the couch later.

I roamed around, it's been a month since the last time I visited our house and it's still quiet usual. Some are just changed but most of the furniture are still there. The dark grey wall are just painted with all white now, which is better.

"I want to ask you something--"

I froze when I saw my dad on the couch. His face became thinner but his reaction was still the same.

What is he doing here?

My eyes traveled through his body and it looked like he's going somewhere. His luggage was beside him and all I can do is to looked at it.

"It's been a while, my dear daughter.."

His voice gives a shiver around my body. My reflection on his eyes was quiet unbearable.

My hands trembled with the way he pursed his lips on me. I feel like I was stiffed with my position for awhile.

"Sis.."

Drake's worried voice consumed my ability to speak.

"M-mom.." I turned my eyes at my mom.

She just looked down after that. The hell!

"Your timing was great! I can finally tell you everything before I go,"

My dad flushes a creepy smile. Does he think that I'm going to buy it? I'm used to a lot of pain and I'm not going to back out anymore.

If this is the right time to know everything, then I'll risk my heart again. They're just enjoying to hurt me like this.

"Go on. I'll just think on how to kick you out of here after this,"

The couch was empty, so I let myself sat on it. I can't stand up for a long time while trying to endure his annoying stares.

"You haven't changed. You're still rude like you used to be," He pursed his lip.

"Of course. I'm still me. I don't have to change just because you told me so.."

I shrugged and crossed my arms. He just laughed for that and covered his mouth like he's preventing himself to laugh more.

Geez..

I rolled my eyes. "Are you going to tell me or what?"

Seriously? I've been waiting and he's talking too much that it's now annoying for me!

"Let's wait for my son-in-law first.." He smirked.

"Son--what?!"

My brows furrowed and stood up. Is he trying to provoke me now?!

"William. Let the kids be happy, please?"

My mom's voice cracked and I was surprised when she begged on her knees in front of my dad.

"W-why.." I didn't know what to do. "M-mom.."

She just nodded and tears stream down her eyes which made me feel confused. Was the revelation before aren't done? Is there something that they're still hiding from me?

"Don't do this, Sir!"

And I was more surprised when I heard his voice. The tear in my eyes instantly escaped and now I just wanted to hurt them for confusing me like this.

Enough, please..

I covered my face with my palm and started to cry there. I felt an arm around me and saw Sebastian embracing me. His face also looked sad, same with Drake and my mom.

Is this my karma? But what did I do to experienced this?

"I'm the one who must be blamed for this! Raine don't deserved this sir! She doesn't know a thing!"

The sadness in Noah's eyes made me stopped from crying. The emotion that he's carrying right now was beyond my expectation.

He's so emotional that I almost believed in him.

"You all ruined my life! Who are you to say that it's not her fault? You're just the son of a person who did this to me and she's the daughter of this bitch!"

"Don't call my mother like that!"

Drake punched him in the face with so much force, which caused him to fell off the floor.

"Oh my god!" My mom gasped.

"Drake!"

Sebastian and Noah pulled him away. He looked so angry that he wants to repeat it again. What the fuck is that?!

"You fucking useless asshole! Don't you ever disrespect my mom like that! You never show her any love even if she's the one who's providing for you! I despised you so much!" Sebastian shouted. He's also fuming mad but I know he's just containing his anger.

"Stay out of this you two! And stop defending your sister!"

"Sir, I am here to apologized in behalf of my father--"

I was surprised when my dad slapped him very hard in the face. What is that for?!

"Dad!" I stood up and took Noah behind me. "What are you doing!"

I turned my eyes at Noah who's still shocked with that happened. My eyes widened when I saw a blood on his lips.

"B-blood.." I stuttered as I tried to touch his lips.

He immediately wiped it before my finger touched it. I don't know what's happening and why my dad hurt him like that!

"His dad was the one who stole my proposal! He's the one who ruined my life Raine! And this man right here, is the one who will ruin your life too!"

I immediately covered my mouth with my palm. No. Dad was wrong.. Noah. No.. Our eyes locked with each other and even though he's not talking, I could see the guilt in his eyes.

A guilt where he shouldn't feel because he's not the one who did it.

To be continued..