Chapter 6：I Love You, Hazel

Billy's regular grin was back and he ruffled her hair, as he often did. Hazel always soaked up the affection like a sponge. He was her only friend but he was also all she had.

Honestly, she wouldn't have survived living in this place another year without seeing him every night. It kept her sane.

"You don't have to do that. As long as you keep drawing for me I'll be happy. There are these things called libraries on the outside with tons of books all for free. You borrow them instead of buy them. Have you ever been to one?" he asked.

Hazel nodded. Her mother used to take her to story time at the local library when she was little.

That did sound nice but there were so many things Hazel knew about simply from listening to him talk, like outer space and volcanoes and things that lived in the ocean.

"You should be in school learning about all of these things yourself," he said a bit angrily. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with you; you shouldn't even be in here."

A small smile appeared on Hazel's face. Billy was the only person in the world who believed that about her. He didn't see her lack of speech as a problem at all.

In fact, he frequently praised her for being smart or funny or creative. She didn't think she was any of those things but it was hard not to believe that earnest face.

She patted his arm comfortingly before writing something down. 'My uncle thinks there is'

Billy scowled. "Your uncle is an idiot. If I could, I would get you out of here. You could go to school and I would make sure you had the best crayons, markers, colored pencils, and paints there are. You could make any kind of art you want."

He talked like that a lot. About what he would do if they ever got out of the mental ward. It sounded amazing but it was nothing but a pipe dream.

Billy knew the rules—they couldn't hold you anymore once you turned 18 and became an adult without a guardian. But that was a very long way away for him and was even longer for Hazel, who was three years younger.

She didn't think she would survive another ten years in this place, especially if he was gone. Hazel wasn't stupid. If she never got to go to school, she wouldn't be able to survive as an adult in this world.

Unfortunately, she knew the only way her uncle would ever let her out was if she spoke like a normal person. She had heard the nurses whispering about it one day.

Even after spending so much enjoyable time with Billy she still couldn't make herself speak. Maybe she had lost the ability to since she hadn't used her voice in so long. But he didn't seem to mind and she loved that about him.

There were a lot of things Hazel loved about Billy. His kindness. That goofy grin of his. All of the interesting things he talked about. The way he petted her hair and made her feel wanted even though the whole world had turned its back on her. He was the best part of her life.

He was still lamenting the fact that she was even in this mental ward so she wrote him another note and held it up. 'I don't mind being here as long as I have you'

Billy sighed. "You should mind. You were too little when you came; you don't remember enough about outside to know what you're missing. But I promise, someday I'll get you out of here. There are so many amazing things you should see and draw; I'll take you everywhere!"

Hazel liked hearing him talk like this even though she knew it was futile. Imagining going cool places with her best friend was nice despite knowing nothing would come of it.

She was crazy. He was dangerous. At least according to the doctors and nurses. They were never getting out of here.

"If I could get you out now, would you go even without me?" Billy asked suddenly. "I promise I would find you someday."

Why did he ask? Hazel would be forced to go back to the uncle who didn't want her even if she could get out.

'Don't talk like that' she wrote sternly.

Hazel feared being left behind by the only person she was certain cared about her even more than she feared her nightmares. Even those had been dwindling lately. They only hit every few days and even then she didn't scream nearly as much as she used to.

She attributed all of those positive changes to the time she spent with Billy. Sometimes she even had pleasant dreams about the things he had talked about from his books. He liked to tell her stories he had read before coming to the hospital.

"Alright, I won't," Billy said with a shrug. "But if I get out before you and we get separated, I promise I will come for you. Do you believe me?"

Hazel nodded. She believed in him more than she did anything else. He was her lifeline; the only light she had in this world.

The sun was rising. Sunrises were so hateful; all they ever did was end the only happy times she had and send her back to people who treated her as if she didn't exist. Hazel only came alive in the night.

Billy stood and offered her a hand to help her up. To her surprise, he seized her in a hug. Though they often did little affectionate touches such as head pats, they almost never hugged. The last time had been after a week-long separation due to heightened security months ago.

"I love you, Hazel. Don't ever forget that."

More than anything Hazel wanted to tell him that she loved him too. He was the first person she had opened her heart to after losing her parents so traumatically. But the words wouldn't come. Instead, she tightened her hold on him and stood on tiptoe to kiss his cheek.

Her mom used to kiss her cheeks all the time as a gesture of affection. It was the best she could do for her friend, who seemed oddly upset today.

Hazel headed back inside and was so tired and happy from the unexpected hug that she actually managed to fall asleep for once. She dreamed about being enveloped in that warm hug, so similar to the ones she used to know.