Chapter 96 - I’ve Never Been In Love Before

'Maybe I am a useless jerk. So what? That does not give people a proper reason to treat me like cheap dirt.'

'Okay, okay, maybe it does.' 

'Yeah, it definitely does. But that's not the point here. The point is listening to what Madeline has to say and reacting to it like a normal… person would.' 

"So," Madeline began.

"Are you there?" She asked, checking in to see if Emilio wasn't in some food coma or had fallen asleep out of boredom. 

"Mhm, I am," Emilio responded in the nick of time, managing to surprise Madeline.

'Wow, I didn't expect him to answer."

Madeline felt it was incredibly random. 

Why would she pour out all her feelings or everything she had pent up to someone like Emilio who she had barely known?

There was Briar. 

There was Xavier, even.

Indiana too.

But it was Emilio who she wanted to spill it to.

It was nice, Madeline had to admit, having a fatherly figure in her life. 

Someone who was looking out for her that wasn't any of her current friends.

Someone who could remind her to take care of herself when she was feeling ill.

All the times she desperately craved a father in her life, such as her high school graduation when everyone else had their parents bringing them flower bouquets and hugging them, or when she realized she was an adult and no longer a teenager. 

There was no one. 

Her adoptive parents were nothing but legal guardians. Nothing more. 

They were never there for her. 

She had to watch as everyone was showered with love whilst she stood there alone, her school bag in hand and her eyes glancing around the room. And all the feelings that came up when she thought back to it only made her feel incredibly pathetic about thinking this way.

High school and teenagehood was a long time ago. 

'I shouldn't be feeling this way, right?'

'That was all a long time ago, it's over now. I should've been done with this ages ago.'

"I don't think I've ever been in love before," Madeline said to Emilio. 

"I'm not sure because I don't know what love feels like."

"There are what books and movies say about it, then there's the fact that I've never witnessed love before."

Emilio felt something strange in his chest. Something that stung.

'Ow, what was that?' He questioned himself.

What was that stinging sensation in his heart? 

Was it pain? Pity?

Or the guilt of not being present in Madeline's life?

Guilt, a recurring moral emotion. 

Saying Emilio was guilty would be an understatement in general. 

"My adoptive parents didn't love each other, that was clear."

That was a fatal blow on Emilio.

"You had adoptive parents?" 

"Yeah," Madeline answered, nodding.

"Oh," he said, sounding heartbroken. 

"I'm sorry, I just—"

"No, no. Go on," Emilio encouraged.

"It's alright. And besides, I did tell you I'd listen, didn't I?"

"I'm a man of my word," Emilio said, trying his best to sound prideful. 

Madeline went silent, before she gathered up her courage to ask him, "What was it like, between you and… What was her name?"

"Cornelia," Emilio answered. 

"Yeah, her," Madeline nodded.

Emilio chuckled. 

"It's inexplicable."

"The relationship between me and that mother of yours."

"She's a real firework."

Emilio stopped himself. 

He was about to practically confess his feelings for Cornelia. Oh luna, wouldn't that have been so insensitive? 

Madeline was just talking about how she didn't know what love was like. And here he was, about to tell her how amazing it felt when he was with her. 

So amazing that he never wanted it to end in the first place.

Love. 

It was like dancing across the clouds in a never-ending waltz with the one person you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. Something would tell you there was only one person in the picture, and that person was your one true love. 

That was how Emilio would describe love to Madeline.

At least, that was what he thought him and Cornelia had. It was obviously wrong, since she had moved on from him and onto something probably better.

Heck, he was so in love with her that he was happy for her and what she had probably achieved by now. 

To this very day, Emilio thought he didn't deserve Cornelia. He never deserved someone as amazing as her.

That was how madly in love he still was. 

Despite all odds, despite the centuries that passed, the love he had for her was one that would never cease to exist.

He could never get over her, and even if he did, which had practically no chance of happening… A part of him would always love her, and keep the fond memories they shared in his heart. 

If Madeline knew of what he thought, she'd burst out into laughter and call him bluff.

She'd wonder how someone like him was capable of feeling such beautiful emotion. That was what he thought, not what would actually happen, of course.

Emilio had a habit of thinking the worst things imaginable would happen. That was how he functioned, bracing himself for disappointment so he wouldn't feel disappointed when all things went horrible.

Although, one thing he knew about Cornelia was that she wasn't the type of person to simply abandon someone like Madeline. 

In some way, Cornelia must've thought keeping Madeline as far away from her as possible was keeping her safe. 

"Cornelia and I were… madly in love," Emilio said, refusing to say anymore than he already had.

Madeline furrowed her brows, honestly expecting more from him than, 'Me and mom were madly in love.'

Perhaps it was from watching all those shows and reading all those books that had made her have higher standards, or because she assumed there was something incredible between Cornelia and Emilio. 

__

Author's Note: It has come to my attention that there was a chapter mix up (with chapters 94 & 95). I sincerely apologize. With all the chapters, it seemed like I posted the wrong chapters.. I'll make sure it won't happen again, I truly am sorry.