Chapter 191 - I know how much you love me

Tiana felt her throat tighten when he said that, it happened a long time ago, and she did not love him at that time, but now he said it, it made her feel like she cheated on him;

''Beautiful… you cannot imagine how chattered I felt; I haven't yet come to terms with my feelings for you and yet I could feel waves of jealousy course through my spines; I tried to control myself and think straight but when I sent for you, you knelt in front of me and pleaded on his behalf; at that moment I could see the intense love and affection you have for him and I lost it; ''

''And you had me locked up… '' she pouted, although she didn't want to think about it anymore, remembering it now, hurt a little.

''That was my greatest undoing, if I could turn back the hands of time, I would rather burn my own hands than let you undergo such torture.'' His eyes were filled with pain as he spoke, and his lips thinned;

Tiana knew he was blaming himself on the inside and she didn't want that; it was past now, and besides, he was that way because of his terrible past, so she swam closer to him and patted on his shoulder;

''It's okay, you don't have to berate yourself, the most important thing is that you are changed and everything is in the past, and remember you were that way because of what you had to go through, so I fully understand; ''

Nicklaus lifted his eyes to look at her, and at that moment, Tiana saw the intense pain written in them;

''Beautiful, no matter what I went through in the past, that does not justify my actions, I wish that day never came, I can't bear the thought of it, everything you had to go through in there… ''

Tiana closed the gap between them and hugged him close; ''It's okay, let's not think about the past, I told you I forgive you and I mean it, you've proven to me in a thousand ways how much you love me, so anything you did in the past does not count; this is the man that I fell in love with, and this is the only side of you that I care about, okay? ''

She placed her head on his chest listening to his heartbeat;

One thing she knew was that Nicklaus loved her, and to a fault, and even though he didn't want to accept it, she knew he did the things he did because of his terrible childhood.

''I love you, beautiful; '' Nicklaus sighed; ''I don't know how to say it anymore. '' 

Tiana angrily lifted her head from his chest and glared at him; in the next second, she covered his lips with hers, kissing him roughly. His lips tainted deep red when she let go of him and he licked it with his tongue, staring at her in surprise;

''I said we should swim not talk about sad stuff; stop berating yourself, and stop saying you love me like you want to prove to me how much you do, I have eyes and I can see, I have a heart and I can feel!; '' her eyes watered as she screamed at him, she hated him feeling that way like he needed to prove his love for her like he couldn't forgive himself for hurting her in the past; '' I know how much you love me Nicklaus from the way you look at me to the way you call me 'Beautiful' so endearingly that I feel my heart skip every single f.u.c.kin' time, even to the way you hold me like you needed only me in this entire world, Nicklaus Howells, I know you love me, and I have never ever doubted your love for me… ''

Her words hung in her throat when Nicklaus pulled her close, seizing her lips fervently; he kissed her intensely and wildly until she felt her legs give way, falling into his arms;

When he let go of her, they were both panting;

''Thank you '' Nicklaus whispered, hugging her close; those were the most passionate words he had ever heard and from his most favorite person in the world, he felt his heart become peaceful and the pain in it fading away.

Tiana hugged him back, finding her breath from the kiss;

''Let's not talk about the past again, okay? '' she whispered lovingly, she hated him feeling pain, he had been through a lot and he deserved to be happy.

Nicklaus nodded, kissing her hair; ''Okay. ''

She snuggled in his arms some more before she let him go and dived into the water, changing the topic into something more livelily.

…

Tiana walked into the elevator leading up to Leo's office, her mood dampening. Knowing that she was going to see Claire today dampened her mood, she needed to clear the air between them and soon.

She took out her phone to tell her husband that she had arrived at the company but just when she tapped her WhatsApp messenger, his message popped up;

'Beautiful, I've arrived at the company, I have three meetings to attend today, I think I'll be home late, send me a text when you're done, okay? Love you.'

Tiana smiled when she saw the text and she texted him back before putting her phone into her bag; just that moment, the elevator doors opened and she lifted her eyes, and they instantly locked in Claire's.

The smile on her lips disappeared immediately. Claire's brows creased as though she was not expecting to see her, but immediately she pulled her eyes from her and walked into the elevator. Tiana watched the door close slowly, leaving both of them in the same space.

She watched the numbers go up slowly as her heartbeat increased from the suffocating tension in the elevator; suddenly she spoke;

''You were already together with him, and I didn't want to ruin things, that's why I didn't tell you. I'm sorry. '' Tiana spoke quickly, making sure she said the most important details in a single sentence.