825 Not a Good Man

"What I mean is that I don't think that you'll beat me up," Long Jinjing whispered.

Lu Zihao scowled. "Hell no. Although I'm not exactly a saint, I won't beat you up. Only weak, insecure, scum men beat up women without any valid reason. Besides, you're my woman now during these thirty days. Like hell I'll beat up my own woman."

She nodded and smiled at his words. "That's what I mean. So I'm not afraid of you, Mr. Lu—I mean, Nikolai."

He leaned forward and nuzzled her jaw while his hands fondled her waist. "But you shouldn't trust me, Jinjing."

Frowning, she leaned back. "Why not?"

"I'm not a good man."

She pursed her lips. "I don't see the world as purely black and white. Every individual has their good and bad points. You're not perfect. I'm not perfect either. Nobody in this living world is perfect and whoever claims to be one is a liar. Even my sister Xiulan was a…uhm, let's say a 'wild' child when we were younger but look at her now. She has become such an amazing person and one of the most generous people I know."

Lu Zihao didn't speak but observed her while she continued talking. 

"Nikolai, even though what we have between us is only lust, the fact that you promised to give me respect as an official girlfriend is already enough to make me see you as a good man. Yes, you're extremely ferocious in bed but there are also times like right now that you're very gentle with me. That tells me that you know how to treat a woman well if you really want to."

She wrapped her arms around his neck. "I don't know why you don't see yourself as a good man but I'll only believe what I see with my own eyes. I'll make my own decisions on who to trust. I can't say that I trust you fully right now, but I trust that you're someone who won't beat me up or treat me like trash. And most importantly, my sister adores you and treats you like a real brother. It makes me jealous sometimes because I want to be closer to her as a sibling but I'm not complaining because our relationship has improved a lot. I'm very happy that we're now in a better place as sisters. That's why my sister's trust in you is enough for me to feel assured of your credibility."

Silence.

"Uhm…."

"Jinjing." 

"Y-yes?"

He looked at her straight in the eyes. "You are a good woman."

She flushed and felt shy.

His words made her frown again. She opened her mouth to speak but he pressed a finger on her lips to prevent her from doing so.

"But don't worry. During these thirty days, you're my woman so I'll treat you right."

She nodded and hugged him by the neck, not wanting him to see that her eyes had watered because of his words.

"Nikolai…" 

He turned his head and sucked the side of her neck, without a doubt leaving another hickey on her skin. "Hm?"

She faced him and initiated a hot, open-mouthed kiss. His erection poked her from below and she ground her hips against it. Feeling daring, she whispered directly to his ear, "I need you again."

Before she knew it, he flipped their positions and she landed on her back while he came on top of her. He opened her legs wide and placed himself between them. Then he cursed.

"The condoms are in the living room," he said.

"Go get them. Hurry."

He sighed and left. While waiting for him to return, Long Jinjing stared at the ceiling. She still felt curious about how he got all the scars on his body but it was clear from his frightening reaction earlier that the topic was strictly off-limits. 

Now that she thought more about it, that moment was really scary. Just remembering it filled her with terror. She didn't expect that he could become so frightening, as if he had become a real-life monster. Despite this, she didn't lie to him when she said that she wasn't afraid of him. So what if he could be scary like that? As long as he treated her right and gave her the respect that she needed, then that was all that mattered.

As much as she wanted to know more about him, she would respect his decision if he didn't want to tell her. Everyone had secrets after all. Besides, their relationship would only last for thirty days. She also agreed to his terms not to become a nagging and clingy girlfriend. Not to mention that knowing too much about him might make her feel too attached to him. 

They could be as intimate as they wanted with their bodies, but it was still best for them to keep some distance between their emotions. This was to protect her heart from developing hopeless feelings for the man.

Finally, Lu Zihao returned to the bedroom with the condoms. He sheathed his erection and joined her on the bed.

"Go book an appointment with a doctor and get a prescription for contraceptive pills," he said. "We're in a relationship now. I don't want the hassle of putting on a condom every time I want to fuck you. I also want to try coming inside you."

She frowned.

Seeing her reaction, he raised an eyebrow. "You're against taking the pill?"

"N-no. That's not it."

He only raised his eyebrow higher.

"I don't mind being on the pill but…"

"Spit it out, Jinjing."

She cleared her throat and turned her head away in embarrassment. "But I can't just let you…uhm…you know…"

He reached over for her chin and forced her to look at him. "You won't let me fuck you raw?"