Chapter 21

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Grace felt comfortable as if her whole body was submerged in warm water. No, it felt like she was covered in a thin blanket by a sunny window. Grace, who was asleep enjoying the comfortable and warm feeling, slowly opened her eyes to the touch of someone stroking her cheek.

Arthur, whose face was covered with a black mask except by her mouth just in front of her, was looking down anxiously.

‘Oh my God!’

At that moment, Grace screamed inside and opened her eyes wide. Then, she made eye contact with Arthur, who had his eyes on her. His eyes grew wide, surprised at her movement, and soon spoke to her with a look of unbelief, “You’re awake?”

“…oh, yes, but where are… ”

“In the carriage. You suddenly collapsed, so I brought you here.”

“But, what happened….” Grace groaned, pressing her throbbing head with her palm. She had heard the strange voice again inside the party, and was knocked out by the terrible pain and fear. Grace wrapped her arms around her body, getting goosebumps again when she recalled the moment.

‘…that voice. Is it the ‘curse’ that makes me hear that terrible voice? Then, will I really die or go crazy in a year like the previous ones?’

When she thought so, the fear that she had forgotten for a while came upon her again. If she had known this would happen, she would have just pretended to be crazy and looked for her own way of living in the mansion.

While Grace was groaning with regret–

“Now that you’re awake, I’ll leave you alone.” Arthur, who gazed at Grace trembling all over with a face full of fear, gently raised himself and opened the carriage door.

‘I’m scared to death right now, where are you going, leaving me alone?’

Grace hurriedly grabbed Arthur’s shirt and said to him who looked like he was about to leave her alone right away, “W-Where are you going?”

“I’m going out.”

“Where? Why? I-Isn’t the party over?” Grace clung to him with a desperate look. Arthur sighed briefly at the sight and answered her in a low voice, “As my Lady said, the party is over. Now I’m going back to my mansion.”

“But why are you leaving? L-Let’s take this carriage together.”

“I’m going to get off and ride a horse.”

“……why, why?”

“…My Lady.”

“Can’t we just ride the carriage together? I’m scared to be alone right now.”

Arthur, who seemingly wanted to leave her behind, held Grace hesitatingly. Unlike her voice, which was filled with fear, Arthur bit his lower lip at Grace’s strong grip on the hem of his shirt. It felt like she would never let go.

He carefully took her hand off him, turned his head coldly and said, “I can’t do that.”

“…what? Why?”

“And from now on, I will never be alone with you again…as for talking face to face with you, today will be the last time.”

“……what?”

Grace stared at Arthur with a blank face at his unkind words. Did he really mean it? Grace grabbed his shirt again, but Arthur shrugged off the hand that held him, avoiding her gaze.

Grace was both bewildered and angry at the sight. She felt anxious that if she let him go like this, she would never see him again. She hurriedly held his hand tightly and shouted, “Why? For what?”

“You know the reason better than me, don’t you?”

“No, I don’t know. Seriously, I don’t know!”

“…My Lady.”

“No! You’re going to tell me to let go, right? I won’t let you go until I hear a convincing reason!”

At Arthur’s urging her to let go, Grace shook her head and resisted. Arthur frowned, almost like he was in pain and shouted at her, “So, why wouldn’t you let go of me? What’s the reason?”

“……what?”

“Why don’t you hate it when the cursed monster duke says he’ll leave you? Isn’t it more difficult if you cling and beg for affection?”

Frustrated by her attitude, unable to stand it, Arthur yelled bitterly at Grace.

Grace’s shoulders shrank at the sight of him. He was always cold but friendly, and this was the first time he was so angry — that he actually screamed. She wanted to avoid it because she was scared, but strangely, she didn’t want to let go of his hand.

Thinking she was confused by the unidentified feeling, Grace replied to Arthur staring at her, “……I don’t know. I don’t know.”

“Ha. You don’t know?”

“But I don’t think we should let it go like this. My heart doesn’t want to let you go.” Grace managed to finish her answer in tears.

Arthur stared at her like that, and muttered, “……damn it!”

He uttered a swear word, stretched out his arms and held her body tightly in them.

Part 3. Confession

Surprised by the sight, Grace raised her hand to block him from approaching her reflexively, but Arthur only hugged her stronger as if he would not let her go.

He grabbed Grace’s hand blocking him and brought it to his chest, and growled, “Can you feel it? How a monster’s heart goes wild with every act of his wife?”

“Obviously that night, I warned you. Your kindness is like giving sea water to those who are dying of thirst… I warned you, so, why do you keep being nice to me? Why are you laughing at a monster like me, talking casually, and holding me back from staying away from you?”

Unlike the harsh voice of “……Duke,” Arthur’s hand, holding Grace’s wrist, was shaking infinitely weakly. When Grace called him in a trembling voice, Arthur burst into laughter and continued, staring at her with passionate eyes.

“……you’ve been busy pushing me away with that look, and I can’t help but wonder why you’re suddenly saying this.”

“You know, actually, I’ve been looking at you from the start. But I tried to pretend that I wasn’t interested. I thought you’d be afraid of the curse put on me like everyone else, and the kind of person who’ll ignore Leon, who looks like me, but you said he’s cute, and smiled and patted him. You even asked about his birthday.”

“…oh, at that time……”

“I couldn’t stop looking at you, this really kind lady. I stayed in my quarters under the pretext of dealing with my duties every day and waited for you to come out for a walk, looking out the window. I tried not to, but before I knew it, my eyes followed you outside the window and listened to your voice.”

In no time, Arthur’s face, which continued to laugh in vain with his exhausted voice, was filled with misery. Grace gazed blankly at his face, letting go of her.

She wanted to comfort him by saying something, but she was tongue tied. Arthur stared at her and expressed his feelings with a smile on his face.

“I tried not to be greedy. I convinced myself that you don’t fit a monster like me, that I don’t want to have you, that I’m just tired of loneliness and misunderstandings, but it never stopped. The more I hold it in, the more love I feel for you day by day.”

“…my heart, my heart…”

“……have you noticed anything now? That’s right. I love you. I’ve got you in my heart, even though I’m subjected to being a monster who should not dare to covet and covet love. In order not to leave your loved one in misery, you must not allow anyone’s heart, so I pushed you away by pretending to be cold. But isn’t it funny how I’m so easily moved by your little words and actions?”

“…I can’t stand how pathetic and miserable I am.”

A drop of tear fell from Arthur’s eyes, expressing his feelings of helplessness. His blue and red odd eye continued to shed tears like a flooded river. When Grace saw his face behind the mask, tears dripping down, her heart was in excruciating pain. She wanted to stop those tears right away. If she couldn’t, then, at least, she wanted to at least wipe away those tears.

But when she reached out, Arthur turned his head and refused to let her touch him. Arthur wiped the tears with one hand, while he spoke again in a hoarse voice, “…so, I’m going to try my best to stay away from you from now on.”

As soon as she heard him, Grace felt her heart throbbing. Grace now asked, clutching his shirt, not looking at him.

“…how does that make sense? Why should the Duke stay away from me?”

“So, do you want me to let you die or go crazy like this? If I don’t move away from you, the curse will get stronger and stronger, and then you’ll simply fall down, like today. The pain won’t be over until you wake up. You want me to just wait and see how you die or go crazy everyday?”

“……so how do you intend to solve this?… Are you going to abandon me?”

Arthur hadn’t tried to make eye contact with Grace since a while ago, serious about getting away from her somehow.

Grace had raised her voice because she was so frustrated, her heart was palpitating in pain. Arthur made a neutral face and questioned, “How dare you think I can abandon you?”

“Then, w-what do we do?”

“From before the time I spoke to you that night… you should live like that, when you didn’t know my true self.”

Arthur coldly took off Grace’s hand, which was holding onto him. Grace looked blankly at Arthur’s back, turning coldly and leaving. She couldn’t help but feel he was lying a bit ago.

“….I’m sorry. You’ve seen me look ugly until the very end.”

With that, Arthur roughly closed the carriage door.