Chapter 4

“I’m going crazy because of you.  How much more miserable are you going to make me!”

Paris’s voice pierced the hall of the mansion.

He strode across the lobby with a rough gait, tearing open his cravat as he walked.

Irina put one hand on her chest and slowly followed him in.

Because of the corset, blood flow and oxygen were being restricted, and intense emotions rose.

From the theater to the carriage on the way back, her head was spinning with vertigo.

Paris shouted at her as she stood still and tried to calm her breathing.

“You screwed it all up,” he yelled.  “What an important performance.  It’s nice to see how noisy the social world will be now!”

As soon as Irina grabbed him by the neck, a plate fell and made a loud sound. Surprised, Lady Young gave out a yelp and then continued to sing.

To Paris, the sound of laughter that filled the opera hall seemed directed towards him.

“Do you know how much time I spend covering up your ignorance?”

Blue veins appeared on Paris’ white neck.

He was grabbed by his wife and dragged out in front of the other nobles. It was a once-in-a-lifetime disgrace that crumpled up all the pride of a man.

It was a passionate fight between the couple that had not been seen in a long time. The nervous servants only kept an eye on them. As if trying to calm the overheated air, the butler Sebastian took a step closer. It was because of Irina’s complexion, which was turning a pale blue.

“Young master. I’m sorry to interrupt, but I think your wife should get some rest…”

“If you know, don’t interfere. Or I’ll shut your mouth for you!”

His shout echoed in the spacious mansion lobby.

Irina clenched her teeth and said, fixing her posture upright.

“You want to make it my fault again? Then tell me straight, what is your relationship with Lady Young?”

She didn’t like it because she was weak in the current situation, although it would have been a good opportunity for her to get out of this argument. Irina didn’t like garnering sympathy or worry to seize a victory. She felt it was insulting.

Paris snorted.

“I’m having an affair with her, do you have any proof, Irina?”

“I assumed you would cheat at least once in your life. It’s something I thought of before we’d gotten married.”

“…!”

Far from raising her voice, Irina spoke calmly.

Paris, who was about to frown at the unexpected reaction, was startled.

He thought Irina would be furious, he didn’t expect her to react like this.

The servants were equally surprised. The idea that she had expected their master to cheat on her.

He wasn’t particularly fond of women. He was simply a man who was quite weak against stimuli, impulses, and temptations.

“You thought about it before getting married to me? That one day I will unconditionally cheat on you…”

Paris’ long, fine eyelashes trembled. His purple eyes were wet with moisture as if they had been hurt. One couldn’t help but feel sorry for him because he was beautiful.

Seeing this, the servants immediately wanted to forgive him even if he had cheated on Irina.

Irina just stared at him with her unchanging expression.

“Tell me if you have. If you say it now, I will move on as if it is not a big deal.”

“There is only one thing I can honestly say.”

Paris shouted in a trembling voice.

With a distorted expression on his face, his trembling hand pointed towards Irina.

“I didn’t know that you would treat me as such a trivial bastard.”

Tak, Irina firmly grabbed his trembling wrist.

“I knew you well, but I took the risk and chose you. Just be honest. That’s it.”

“You want to hear the truth, Irina?”

Ferris looked at her with empty eyes, as if frustrated.

“It’s not like anything you think it is. Just like other nobles, I decided to go to the baron’s mansion to play card games and become a patron of Lady Young’s art. Are you happy now?”

He shook off Irina’s hand.

“Lady Young is sixteen years old. The first time I saw her was when she was thirteen. You’re telling me I’m having an affair with a minor. Do you know what that means?”

He glared at her Irina with contemptuous eyes, then made his way up the stairs of the lobby.

Irina stared at his back as he moved away.

She was confused. Her husband was someone who couldn’t hide his feelings.

He was immediately teased if he lied or acted.

He was a human being whose legs trembled, who bit his lips, touched his eyebrows and face here and there, giving obvious signals when he was nervous. He was a man who blew his cover at even a little bit of questioning.

His eyes were full of affection as he looked at Lady Young, who was singing.

It was also clear that he felt emotionally betrayed by Irina’s reaction and suspicion of him.

A small uneasiness grew in Irina’s heart.

Maybe she was wrong?

Could it be that he was just intoxicated with his artistic knowledge as always? Was she being sensitive and making a mistake?

Thoughts poured out simultaneously without order.

“… ha…ugh.”

She felt dizzy to the point of gasping and looking to the ground.

“Lady!”

“Miss Irina!”

The terrified screams of the servants could be heard from a distance.

Immediately, her body tilted and her vision darkened at the same time.

* * *

Her eyes were weighty and heavy as if they were drowning in water.

Irina slowly opened her eyes, forcing open her eyelids.

The faint light of the lamp lit up the dark room.

The place where Irina woke up was in Paris’ bedroom.

Like other nobles, Irina and Paris had their own bedrooms.

“Paris… did I stay overnight…?”

Irina muttered while still hazy.

“what…”

Recalling the events of the day, Irina let out a deep sigh.

Her shame swept over her in waves.

She fell in front of a lot of people. Even in front of the servants, the ones she is supposed to take care of.

She was Irina, who hated being weak to anyone rather than dying.

They were busy all day managing her mansion, property, and her daughter’s life.

She didn’t want to add another worry.

As she thought about it that far, another embarrassment came upon her.

The owner and couple showed in front of others how low their trust was in each other.

Her face heated up at the ridiculousness.

As she closed her eyes tightly, feeling like she wanted to forget what had happened, she heard regular breathing next to her.

Irina opened her eyes slightly and looked to her side.

Her maid, Louise, fell asleep on the bed.

She felt sorry for her, who must have been worried about her all day.

“Shall I go for a walk?”

It was bittersweet to talk to herself. She thought for a moment that the maid was her husband.

When she confirmed that it wasn’t him, she was embarrassed of herself.

He was irresistible.

As she had grown up, Irina knew nothing but the fun of wielding a sword among her knights and her military dogs. Paris was Irina’s first love and first boyfriend.

Irina felt her chest tighten. She felt that she wanted to get some air.

As she lay, she turned her head to look out the window and saw the full moon.

It was late enough that her daughter should be asleep.

When she thought of her, she suddenly felt an intense desire to see her only child, her precious Juliet.

Her daughter’s bedroom could be accessed directly from Irina’s bedroom without going through the hallway.

But this is her husband’s bedroom. She had to go to the other end of the hallway to see her sleeping daughter.

Irina crossed the hallway, lead by the light of her lamp. She quietly opened her daughter’s door and entered.

“… Juliet.”

The light of the full moon passed through the pale pink canopy and landed on her daughter’s bed.

Irina was careful not to wake her daughter, who had fallen into a deep sleep. She sat quietly on the edge of the bed. The chubby fingers of her new seven-year-old daughter wiggled.

Irina’s daughter, Juliet, was insanely cute.

Juliet’s appearance was so perfect that it could be said that Paris gave birth to her, and she inherited all his genes. Her shiny blonde hair was naturally curly. It was cute like a doll. Her skin was as white as milk, and her cheeks plump with a blushing pink. Her eyelashes were long enough to describe her fluttering, and her eyes were round like a baby deer.

The only thing Irina gave to Juliet was her blue eyes.

Thanks to this, Juliet was born with a look that perfectly fit the kingdoms beauty formula of blonde and blue eyes.

Of course, no matter what Juliet looked like, to Irina, she would have been as lovely as an angel.

Irina smiled softly.

Her fingertips gently brushed Juliet’s hair behind her ear. It was a gesture full of affection.

“Beautiful…”

The daughter, who was breathing regularly, whined a little and tossed and turned.

Irina chuckled at her heartbreakingly cute appearance.

It felt like all her worries had melted away.

“… Don’t.”

“Yes?”

Juliet babbled through her little mouth.

Irina bowed her head closer to hear her daughter’s sleep talk.

“Mom, Dad… don’t fight… No…”

thud.

Something heavy seemed to fall down to her stomach. Her lips were dry and her breathing trembled.

Her daughter had heard them.

At the thought of that, she shuddered and felt tears prick her eyes. Irina raised her head slightly and turned her gaze out the window. Her guilt gripped her. She clutched the bed sheet.

Children are the ones whose hearts are hurt, even if mom and dad are angry for only a moment. How could this little thing see a sight so callous that upset even their most veteran servants?

There was a throbbing pain in her heart.

Irina leaned over and kissed Juliet’s forehead tenderly.

“I’m sorry. Mom will never scare you again.”

Irina whispered softly to Juliet’s forehead.

She atoned from the depths of her heart. She was the one who grew up without a mother. Her desire to raise her daughter without darkness was even stronger.