Chapter 58

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Filina tried constantly to get close to Henry.

She visited his mansion every single day, and when there was an aristocratic party or ball, she looked for Henry first.

Of course, no matter how hard she tried, it wasn’t easy to meet him.

Even when she visited the Argeny’s mansion, Henry just stayed inside to train, and he did not attend the parties enjoyed by the nobles.

The only thing Filina could aim for was the scene where the original was going on.

Or sat in the mansion until he came back.

Filina tended to be rather impatient, so she used two methods efficiently.

Before visiting his mansion, she sent a letter in advance asking when Henry would go.

He had never replied, but he didn’t say no, so Filina visited the mansion every day, feeling like she was going to play.

Of course, that didn’t help much.

He didn’t have time to see Filina because of his busy training.

When she was lucky enough to see his face, Henry would speak in a cold voice.

“I’ve never invited Lady Debussy to my house.”

It was an unfriendly response to what he heard when she waited for him for a long time.

At that time, Filina responded indifferently with the same look on her face.

“How expensive is my body…You’re so cold-hearted.”

And that was how Henry came to open up to her.

“Isn’t this the Young Lady of the Debussy family?” (Henry’s father)

It was none other than the day he faced the Duke of Argeny (Henry’s father) at his mansion.

“Long time no see, Duke.” (Filina)

Filina, who had been invited to all kinds of social gatherings with her father, had also met the Duke of Argeny.

After a brief exchange of greetings with Henry’s father, Henry returned from training at the palace, and he stared blankly at his father who was talking to Filina.

The Duke of Argeny then told Henry to ‘take it easy’, and at Filina’s insidious request, Henry’s training was cancelled until the next session.

From that day on, Henry occasionally invited Filina to his mansion.

At first, he ignored her, and as soon as she became worth using, he allowed her to approach him, which was a mastermind-like appearance.

Since then, the two have become a little closer. It was all thanks to Filina’s tireless efforts.

The moments of laughing and chatting with Henry passed like a film.

She felt dizzy as if her head had been messed up.

She felt nauseous as so many memories came rushing back to her all at once.

“My mother died because…. it was all my father’s fault.” (Henry)

Henry’s voice, which had swallowed his tears in her arms, was heartbreaking.

“I hate myself for trying to get my father’s attention.” (Henry)

Fragments of memory turned into sharp glass and attacked Filina. His sad face was suffocating.

She was at her wits’ end with the cruel pain coming from her heart.

“When I told you not to come near me, you didn’t listen…….” (Henry)

Her fingers trembled.

“Now you say you’ll leave me…?” (Henry)

Soon when his eyes stared at her, it brought up a memory she didn’t want to think about.

“…on whose permission?”  (Henry)

A big hand tightly wrapped around Filina’s neck.

“I’ll never let you go.” (Henry)

A fading little life.

Filina stared at him as her life fading away.

The cloudy purple eyes, which lost its reason as if it were manipulated by something, returned to its original color.

“Oh, no……” (Henry)

Henry, who shook his head as if he could not admit it when he saw her unconscious, shed tears like a child.

“Why… what’s wrong? Filina… Please, wake up…….What?” (Henry)

Tears streamed ceaselessly from his purple eyes as if they had broken down.

“I don’t like this kind of prank..…. Please, don’t do this to me…….” (Henry)

Henry hugged Filina and repeated the same words. His face was already covered with endless tears.

“Filina, I’m wrong…….Don’t die……”

Henry sobbed for hours and eventually fainted.

As Filina became a third party and looked at it, she wondered.

This kind of memory didn’t exist for her. Since she was dead in the first place, it was natural that she didn’t know the back story.

……then, was this an illusion?

Was it a false memory created by the fruit of hallucinations?

But it was strange.

Why wasn’t Henry aware that she was dead because of him……?

Filina was confused.

Eventually, she caught her breath and moved to another timeline.

“I came to ask you to do something.”

It was her third life. She saw Leon and other old colleagues who had established a friendship with her for a while.

“Kidnap Cecilia, the crown prince’s fiancée.”

Leon looked at her with an expressionless face.

It had been a long time.

To see his bare face without a mask.

Clean skin without blemishes, a high nose, and light red lips.

His distinct features gave off a three-dimensional effect.

“I can pay enough money. And I will help you and your friends not to be caught by the Imperial Knights.”

The guild members burst into laughter at the last words that Filina uttered.

It was because they couldn’t believe if she could really help them, 

a lady who seemed to have grown up without any hardships.

Leon, who was staring at Filina with an easy face until then, asked softly.

“How do you intend to help us?”

She shrugged her shoulders and spoke in an arrogant tone.

“Even if I’m like this, I have pretty good connections.”

In fact, in the original ‘Flower of Cecilia’, she knew how Ian caught the treason guild, but she didn’t show it.

“I’m sure I’ll be of great help. I can assure you. So trust me.”

Leon looked at her with an unknown expression. That was never a good sign, she thought.

Perhaps he was suspecting that she was sent from the palace.

“For your information, I don’t really like palace people either.”

Maybe it’s better to show her hate.

She didn’t bother to add anything else.

And so, Leon accepted Filina’s request. He may be wondering why she was trying to abduct Cecilia, but he didn’t ask anything.

She liked that.

Filina informed Leon of various information she had learned from the Imperial Palace. It was to build trust.

She hoped they would not accept it as a simple request. Her fate was at stake, and she was desperate for the Guild’s help.

This time, she was going to stop Henry’s plan.

Filina met with Leon frequently to work out the details of the plan, and over time she naturally became friends with the Guild.

“…… May I call you by name?”

She replied as if it were no big deal to Leon’s cautious vice.

“Yes, call me Filina. And please speak to me informally. We’re the same age anyway.”

Each time the imperial knights were cleanly separated, Filina played a major role. The guild members who ignored her at first would be the first to ask Leon about her whereabouts if Filina was no longer there.

Most of them loved drinking, and whenever there was a small excuse, they had a drinking party.

She did not dislike their atmosphere.

No, she rather liked it.

Because with them she could at least forget all the painful memories of the past.

“Whenever I’m with you, I sometimes feel different. I’ve never been ashamed of myself……I’m so embarrassed.”

Leon’s distant voice and the cool wind surrounding them broke her heart.

“Because I become a miserable person with nothing in front of your noble status…….”

She never expressed her status to him. But he knew. Because most nobles were immediately apparent by the dignity of their appearance.

“Leon, do you limit a person’s relationship to that level of status? I have never once felt that you were different from me. I am the same person as you.”

A deepening gaze and far-reaching emotion.

Filina realized without difficulty what his eyes meant. But she dared not try to explain.

For Filina, emotional consumption was a luxury.

What would she want here, not knowing when she would die at any moment?

Moreover, the world she lived in was not real. So it was hard to talk about affectionate feelings toward someone.

The fruit of hallucination sought out unexpected pieces of memory. Filina suddenly felt suspicious. Rather than a painful memory, it was merely a past that had passed.

Was it really the right memory brought about by the fruit of hallucination?

It was a fact that she didn’t need to doubt, but it felt strange somehow.

Her mind was too calm. She did not feel the pain that the fruit of hallucination gave her.

It was as if she had been purified.

Filina slowly opened her eyelids, which had been tightly closed.

At the same time, her eyes met Lawrence’s in front of her. He stared at her with a surprised look on his face.

Looking around, Filina was the first to wake up after eating the fruit of hallucination. 

Everyone was experiencing hallucinations with painful faces.

Some of them were shedding tears, others were sweating like rain.

Filina was the only one who looked well.

Filina turned her head and tapped Bessie on the shoulder.

She had to wake them up quickly before the painful memories tangled.

But Bessie was hard to wake, her face painfully contorted.

Filina raised her hand to wipe away the tears spilling from her cheeks.

“Sir Bessie, wake up. What you’re seeing now is just the past. The existence of painful memories does not guarantee that the future will be dark. If Sir Bessie can let go of that memory, a new world will always unfold.”

It was very vague words that she uttered. She knew how hard it was to let go of memories.

Rather, it was not her who couldn’t let go of that memory and dreams of revenge.

For whom would true forgiveness be for?

It was hard to carry a heart that hates someone. Even though it was not such pain that she wanted, the memories of the past became dark shadows that hound her relentlessly.

She knew that the only person who could break it off was herself. But the reason why she couldn’t easily let go was simple.

The pain she had had to endure may disappear in an instant.

….Perhaps she needed some comfort.

Did the sadness of carrying the pain struggle until now to be healed at all?

“Huh?”

At that moment, she locked eyes with Leon, who was sitting in front of Bessie.