Chapter 80 - Speedrunning The Chunin Exams

Heheh, I kept my promise.

I'm back with a chapter~​​

Anyways, if there are mistakes in this chapter, my only excuse it that

The story is AU.

Teehee~

I hope you enjoy the chapter.

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"Ayame, our eyes, they are called the Ramengan."

"The Ramengan is a very strong dojutsu. It even ranks above the Uchiha's Sharingan. There are many uses but I'll tell the basics first. The Ramengan helps you identify and create perfect ramen that can bring others peace and happiness. Do you remember what Akihiko's cookies taste like?"

"Yes."

"His cookies might seem basic but they are made with passion and dedication. He already reached the pinnacle of baking cookies. With our ramengan, you can reach his level of skill easily with practice."

"So….. we can only make ramen?" Ayame asked as Teuchi shook his head.

"Ayame, look into my eyes. What do you see?"

"Umm, my reflection?" Ayame was getting philosophical.

"No. You can see the swirling pattern which all joined in the middle of the eye at the symbol of a ramen bowl. Those lines represent karmic lines. Once you mastered how to make the best ramen, you can start to practice the abilities of this ramengan.

One ramengan and others are never the same. My ramengan is mostly for attacking. I can kill anyone by cutting their karmic noodle lines across their body. Your ramengan is mostly for support.

You can buff anyone just by treating them your ramen."

"Wow, nice. I can help Akihiko now."

"You should focus on yourself and your sisters (Akihiko's other lovers.). Akihiko will almost never need help. He is strong. Very strong.

Let me continue about the eyes.

After you master the ramengan, you can achieve the Rinne-Ramengan. Once you get it, you can easily use these Broth Seeker orbs. They have all the fusion of elements and it can act as an absolute defense around you or someone you want to protect. And last but not least, one of the most overpowered abilities.

Ramen Revival. You must sacrifice one Broth Seeking Orbs for this to work. You can revive anyone from the dead. But the person must have eaten the pinnacle ramen to be revived.

You will also gain one personal ability that can only be accessible to you."

'Sorry that I didn't tell you that I will have to sacrifice one of my eyes to evolve your Ramengan. It might be too much for you right now. But this sacrifice is nothing compared to your safety.' Teuchi thought as he smiled.

[Flashback end]

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Kirigakure was in turmoil as the Mizukage was killed out of nowhere. However, the citizens of Kirigakure were celebrating the death of the Fourth Mizukage.

Almost all of them hated the Fourth Mizukage because he was a bad ruler. During his rule, he had extremely bad relationships with every other village. No one knew that he was controlled by Obito's Mangekyou Sharingan.

Mei Terumi was planning to overthrow Yagura's reign but she was shocked. Just the day she was going to attack Yagura, he was killed by some mysterious man. It was reported by a chunin on the side of Mei Terumi.

"What is going on? Who could have killed the Mizukage like that? There was large destruction around the place where the fight happened. It must have been an extremely hard fight. But what about the Three-Tails? Were the attackers planning to steal the Three-Tails? I should investigate further." Mei muttered to herself.

{a/n: The chunin didn't know the difference between a hard fight and pure destruction.}

However, she was still not complaining since her plans were achieved. She would now try to repair the relationships between the villages and make Kirigakure prosper again.

She was sure that she would be elected as the Fifth Mizukage.

-----

Meanwhile, Itachi was coming back to the Akatsuki hideout while wondering about who killed Yagura.

"Oh, Itachi. You're fast. Is he that weak?"

"No. When I arrived, he was already dead."

"Is the Three-Tails dead?"

"No. Yagura was knocked out immediately and the tailed beast must have been extracted from him. There weren't any traces of injuries on Yagura except for a chop on the neck."

"Find where the Three-Tails is. We cannot lose it. It is essential for our plans."

"Leave that task to me~" someone said with a playful voice as he appeared as his head came out of a space crack.

"Fine."

They continued discussing their plans as the one who caused all this trouble was sipping tea.

-----

[In Suna]

"This tea is delicious. It's jasmine tea, isn't it?" Akihiko asked as he took a sip of the jasmine tea early in the morning.

He already merged Isobu's chakra with his own and gained 10000 chakra. It was less than the last time since the chakra last time had both Hashirama and Tobirama's reanimated chakra in it.

He also gained [Coral Release] which was, to be honest, quite useless for Akihiko. He was thinking of using it to create souvenirs for his daughters.

"This tea is delicious. It's jasmine tea, isn't it?" Akihiko asked as he took a sip of the jasmine tea.

"Haha, you sure know the way of the tea, young man." An old man with a balding head and a fat belly said as he poured another cup of jasmine tea.

"Master, I'm back with the tea leaves." Inari came back as he saw Akihiko.

"EHH?! Why are you here?!" Inari asked Akihiko replied while sipping the tea.

"I'm here to ask your mother's location. She's hot. I'm going to steal her."

"…" (Inari)

"It was just a joke. Relax." Akihiko continued but Inari looked at him with doubt in his eyes.

"Master Hori, can I learn how to make proper tea now?"

{a/n: Some wordplay with the name of one of my most favorite characters, Iroh.}

"No, young Inari. You have to build the foundation properly. In order to brew proper tea, you will have to learn all the types of leaves."

"You've been saying that for 4 months now."

"Sorry, but I'll have to leave for today. I have some important business in Suna."

"It's fine, young man. You can come and drink tea with this old man anytime."

Akihiko then left the house as he went to the hotel.

------

After he rested for a while in the hotel, he just gathered around every genin from Konoha as he led them to where the first test will be held.

"I wish you all luck." Akihiko just said that as he winked in the direction of Ino and Hinata. They both smiled while Sakura who was near them blushed while making a confused noise.

*Insert confused noise*

But they went inside the test area as they took the test. Akihiko just left Suna as he went back to Konoha and played with his daughters.

After 2 hours, he came back and he went back to pick up the genins who passed and failed.

He sent the ones who failed back to Konoha.

-----

For the second test, the genins had the same test as Akihiko had when he came to Suna. The only difference was that there were many groups that will pass as they all prioritized survival this year.

Akihiko was looking at the test together with other ambassadors and officials from Sunagakure. Gaara was also there.

But then he got a random thought, 'Is my fart faster than the Raikage's speed?'

'Hmm, it should be. After all, it is infused with natural energy. I might be able to shoot my fart like an air bullet but much more deadly. What the hell am I thinking?'

He just continued to watch the test as Gaara was looking at Akihiko from time to time.

[a/n: Kinda sus, don't you think?]

The second test ended 2 hours later and all the genins had one week to prepare.

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[1 week later]

Akihiko had been going back and forth between Suna and Konoha to meet with his daughters and lovers.

When he came back to Suna, he usually sparred with Sasuke, Hinata, Ino, Sakura, Lee, TenTen and Neji.

Well, they couldn't even land a hit on Akihiko.

During this week, he made 1000 weed cookies but didn't try it on himself. Why?

'Drugs are bad. They can ruin your life.'

That was his only reason.

Ino and Hinata had become close with Sakura again and they often set the talk around Akihiko. Hinata and Ino made that decision.

They decided to make Akihiko's harem extremely large.

------

Today was the day of the last chunin exams and everyone in Suna was hyped. They wanted to see an exciting fight, unlike Akihiko's fight during his chunin exams. It was just too fast.

"THE THIRD TEST WILL NOW COMMENCE!"

First match: Sasuke Uchiha vs Neto Rare

Sasuke just dashed forward and beat the shit out of Neto Rare. He didn't know why. He hated Neto Rare.

[a/n: I hate netorare too. Do you?]

Second Match: Lee vs Tawa Goto

Lee too, easily kicked the shit out of Tawa Goto(shit).

[a/n: His name means "Shit".]

Third Match: Sakura vs Random Mob

Sakura won.

Fourth Match: TenTen vs Random Bob

TenTen won.

There were a few unimportant matches between.

Sixth Match: Neji vs Kiba

Neji won.

Seventh Match: Hinata vs Temari.

[a/n: I will have to describe this properly]

"Match Start."

Temari walked slowly as Hinata said with a smirk.

"Oh ho, you're approaching me?"

"I can't beat the shit out of you without coming closer."

"Oh ho, then come as close as you like."

Hinata said as Temari started attacking.

She waved her large fan as a wind gust was unleashed towards Hinata. Hinata easily blocked that with Eight Trigram Palms: Revolving Heaven.

Temari immediately ran towards Hinata after the attack and was prepared to bonk Hinata.

Hinata however just waited for Temari to arrive in the range of her attack.

Once Temari came into the Eight Trigram Palms' attack range. Hinata unleashed her attack swiftly.

She hit 32 of Temari's acupuncture points as Temari couldn't move anymore. The attack was swift but Temari could see the attacks. It was just that her body couldn't respond to what her eyes were seeing.

Hinata just smirked as she went closer to Temari's ear and whispered.

"If you like Akihiko, we can share him together~ After all, Akihiko loves beautiful women~"

"W-WHO THE HELL WOULD LIKE THE STINKY BASTARD?!" Temari yelled with a slightly red face surprising everyone in the arena.

"What the fuck is she talking about?" (A mob in the arena)

"I don't know. Do you know what she is talking about, Phuk Yu?"

"Of course, I don't know. Why the hell are you asking me anyway, Phuk Me?"

Back to the story, Hinata just chuckled before lifting Temari up and carrying Temari like how Dio carried Polnareff down the stairs.

She then just dropped Temari from the stage.

"You can give your answer anytime you want~"

The fight ended just like that.

-----

[In the VIP room]

Gaara just turned back and whispered to his assistant.

"Promote Temari to chunin rank."

"But Lord Kazekage, she just lost the first round."

"Tell them that I guarantee her power. That should be enough."

The assistant just nodded as he exited the VIP room.

Akihiko laughed as he heard about how Gaara was using his Kazekage privileges.

-----

(skip to Ino's fight since there are other random mob's fights)

Match 9: Ino Yamanaka vs Phuk Him (Brother of Phuk Yu and Phuk Me)

"Thank you for your sacrifice, comrade." Ino just said as she disappeared from Phuk Him's view.

*Bam*

Phuk Him just felt a hand behind him and he fainted.

Ino just ended the fight with a head chop.

"Teehee~" Ino made a victory peace pose and turned towards where Akihiko should be.

However, the audience cheered loudly thinking she was showing it to them.

-----

The chunin exams continued as Sasuke, Ino, Hinata, Lee and Neji dominated their fights. The one who won first place was Sasuke. He won against Hinata and he used his Sharingan. Hinata kept up with him until he used his Three-Tomoe Sharingan. He could easily see and notice every attack and countered them all.

When he won the last fight, he turned towards Akihiko like a son wanting praise.

Akihiko thought of many things to reply as he just smiled.

"Good fight!"

Sasuke smiled brightly and Hinata also smiled as she was acknowledged by Akihiko.

'Haha, take that. I'm extremely good with my words.' Akihiko thought.

Ino lost against Lee but she almost won. It was just that Lee's mental strength was too strong. He had extreme willpower.

For taijutsu, Lee just removed his weights to fight Ino. He became extremely fast and even Neji would have difficulties keeping up with Lee. Lee's body was enhanced by Akihiko's blood as it made him faster, stronger and had more endurance. Using this opportunity, he trained like a madman for the past 2 years, easily surpassing his teammates.

[a/n: Don't mind me. Just casually powering up Lee. I think he should be that strong. After all, hard work needs to pay off. In canon, he's weak.]

After all that, they returned to Konoha.

Temari was breathing in a rhythm to calm her mind but she just couldn't take the thing Hinata said off her mind.

While she was breathing, she would start to fucking imagine Akihiko smiling.

'WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?!'

-----

"Sasuke, congratulations on winning first place." Akihiko said as he patted his head.

"Hmph, of course I'll win." Sasuke replied while closing his eyes and a smug smile.

"Tch."x2

Ino was still salty about Sasuke interrupting her kiss with Akihiko. The other one who tch'ed was Neji, he was beaten by Sasuke to a pulp.

They arrived back in Konoha. Akihiko immediately teleported Ino and Hinata back to their home while he returned to the Uchiha Household with Sasuke.

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[3 months later]

Akihiko was on his bed and was gasping in short intervals.

What happened here? No one knows except for Akihiko and the Author.

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(End-)

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This is it for today.

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I hope you have a nice day.