Based on the fact I still have wet dreams, that means I still don’t masturbate often enough.
Wet dreams may be ‘automatic’ when compared to masturbation, but the biggest shortcoming is that it ruins your underwear.
It was still dark and gloomy outside and I wasn’t sure what time it was. I wobbly got off the bed and felt my way to the washroom with my wet underwear.
I reminded myself to not go back to the wrong room like last time as I took off my underwear. I wrapped it up in a plastic bag and tossed it into the dirty laundry basket, then I used warm water to wash my slippery mushroom.
Even from my own point of view, my thing was really ugly. No wonder the class leader and Xiao Qin were both scared when they saw it.
I then crept back into the large bedroom like a thief and fell deep asleep.
I woke up early the next morning. I wasn’t sure if I was a bit afraid of Su Qiao who was bewitched by Ai ShuQiao. I put on my track suit and went for a run around Dong Shan lake to get rid of my extra energy.
As gramps Ren said, the municipal government was building pavilions around the lake to use the scenery and attract more tourists to our city. Dust filled the air and made me cough.
Even then, I still ran three laps around the lake. My plan today was to meditate and calm myself. Su Qiao was going to live at my place for at most ten or so days. I have to resist against seduction attempts and prevent Ai ShuQiao’s plans from succeeding.
Su Qiao had already prepared breakfast when I returned and was waiting for me. She was twiddling her fingers like she was ashamed she woke up later than me.
She was wearing a white t-shirt and a pair of black stretch pants like she was about to continue training her acrobatics skills.
Also, Su Qiao’s breasts might not be that large, but she was still able to get good curves with the help of her t-shirt. It’s like she’s cheating! Is she wearing a magic bra or something?! Hurry up and tell me where she bought it, so I can tell Xiao Qin and let her be happy.
In addition, I don’t think it’s safe wearing a pair of pants like stretch pants without a belt, I could easily pull it down.
No, my thoughts are too impure, there are a lot of different types of pants that don’t have belts. For example, our spring school uniform doesn’t have a belt. I heard a groups of boys screwed up when they were pranking others by pulling off other people’s pants. They pulled off a female students’ pants and their parents were called and they had to write an eight thousand word self-reflection essay.
I was in a state of where I knew my parents wouldn’t get called even if I pulled down Su Qiao’s pants.
I forced myself to not look at Su Qiao’s body and called her over to eat.
After we ate, I realized the dirty underwear I threw in the laundry basket last night was washed by Su Qiao and was hanging on the balcony.
That… underwear has my seed on it, did she wash it directly with her hands? That has the unique smell of a man, so she must have known what it was, how embarrassing.
Next time I can’t just leave it in the bin, I have to wash it myself.
In a rare occurrence, I received a call from Eunuch Cao on the weekend.
Eunuch Cao kept flattering me until I impatiently asked why he called.
“Hehe, master you’re wise for being able to tell I have a request. A few days ago, I said I needed your help but you were busy so I didn’t want to bother you. I waited until it was beyond help until I told you…”
“If it’s beyond help, then what can I do. And I heard it was Director Cao who needed my help.”
There was a rustling sound and Director Cao came on the phone.
“Xiao Ye Zi. I need you to help me with something really important.”
“Don’t say anything if it’s about getting another pair of Ai Mi’s underwear.”
“Ah, Ai Mi’s underwear is important, but this is even more important. Xiao Ye Zi, your older brother is going to die!”
“Your brother’s going to die!” I said angrily before I calmed down and realized I didn’t even have a brother.
“Director Cao, why are you saying those frightening words?”
“Xiao Ye Zi, I just wanted to catch your attention. Wu Sheng, the actor for Jin Ling young thug, looks a lot like you, so I often jokingly call him your brother.”
I frowned, “What’s going on, why did you say he’s going to die? Did an accident happen during shooting?”
“No, it’s actually Wu Sheng himself who said he’s going to die, his depression is getting worse.”
I could get an overall grasp of the situation based on what Director Cao said.
Director cao was able to get some good luck after being arrested from visiting prostitutes. He met a ‘prostitute friend’ in jail, a parvenu luxury watch merchant. He was able to persuade the watch merchant to become a sponsor and receive 2 million in funding.
Let’s not mention the fact Director Cao used twenty thousand from the funding to buy a pair of Ai Mi’s underwear. He wasn’t even able to accomplish the sponsor’s request of inserting product placement into the film.
The main problem was that ‘depression bro’ had the integrity of an actor and said he would never be able to act in a historical drama while wearing a Rolex. Since Wu Sheng’s father was a diplomat and his mother was a pianist, he was acting because of art and not because of money. So even if Director Cao paid Wu Sheng three times more, he still wouldn’t change his beliefs.
Director Cao had no choice but to change the script. In order for the Rolex to have a chance to appear, he arranged for Jin Ling young thugs to have a fight in a walk-in freezer. Director Cao’s idea was to freeze a bunch of Rolex watches in the freezer and then include them in the shots so everyone would be happy.
Who knew Wu Sheng didn’t have a good body, and he caught a cold halfway through the scene in the freezer.
It wasn’t a serious cold, but depression bro was easily influenced. His sickness made his depression worse, to the point where he couldn’t leave the bed.
When Director Cao called me, Wu Sheng was still lying in a small clinic near film city. After he finished the IV drip, he told Director Cao he couldn’t keep acting as Jin Ling young thug anymore.
Director Cao worked with Wu Sheng for a couple of months, so he knew he couldn’t force Wu Sheng to act if he didn’t want to. If Director Cao asked for break fee, Wu Sheng’s parents would immediately hand it over, but it would break their amicable relationship.
That’s why Director Cao told Wu Sheng he had a substitute in mind (obviously me). He told him that I looked like him and if I used some makeup, no one could tell, but I was against acting as an antagonist…
Wu Sheng was shocked when he heard, “He looks like me? Then does he also have depression?”
Director Cao shook his head, “No. There are very few people with depression as bad as yours, he’s relatively happy most of the time.”
Wu Sheng took a deep breath, “That’s great. I never thought I would ever meet a happy person who looks like me in this world! I have to meet him! Director Cao, tell him to come, I’ll persuade him to take over my role.”
That’s also why Director Cao called me. He knew I wouldn’t agree if he asked, so he wanted to let Wu Sheng persuade me.
“Didn’t I already tell you I won’t act that role? You shouldn’t have hired a person with depression in the first place.”
Director Cao said innocently: “But it was hard to find someone who looks like you.”
“And you shouldn’t have found someone who looks like me.”
“But Xiao Ye Zi, if you don’t come, Wu Sheng might pass on!”
“How, he has depression and not influenza. I’m not a doctor, so how would I help?”
“Xiao Ye Zi, depression is still a matter of the mind. Wu Sheng became an actor just to feel a bit of happiness when playing different roles. When he sees someone like you who acts carefree without any worries, he might get better.”
Who has no worries? I have a ton of worries.
“Xiao Ye Zi, you have to think positively. What if after Wu Sheng sees you, he wants to live again, then you wouldn’t have to play the part of Jin Ling young thug.”
It sounded like Director Cao already decided I would play the part, but he wanted to make more attempts to persuade me.
To be honest, Director Cao might be a bad person but he’s not a hypocrite. Also, he might be a lolicon, but he hasn’t done anything other than collect underwear.
Compared to Director Cao, the school doctor is an actual shotacon who laid her hands on actual shotas.
Director Cao is still one of my dad’s friends after all. They are even in the same HHH club and have the same rank. He’s someone who would help my dad out and talk with when my my dad would reminisce about his painful past, so I should still help him out.
As the saying goes, the show must go on. If Wu Sheng can’t act anymore, I could only reluctantly use Wu Sheng’s name and act as his substitute.
Since I’ve already acted as an antagonist in an American production, it doesn’t matter if I do it again in a Chinese production.
I should visit Wu Sheng today. It’s a bit regretful we haven’t met yet even though we look very similar.
Director Cao wasn’t able to hold back his joy when I agreed to visit. He wanted to drive by to pick me up, but I said I had some stuff to take care of and will head over myself later.
I was actually already leaving for film city, but I wanted to go visit Ai Mi once at the shooting grounds for the Magic Cauldron show.
I could also check on Auntie Ren’s condition at the same time.
After I wore my clothes, I suddenly remembered: If I left, I had to make sure the large bedroom was locked. There were a lot of private items in the large bedroom, including the listening device receiver.
I told Su Qiao I had to head out. I never specified where, and she wouldn’t dare ask if I didn’t mention it myself.
I instructed Su Qiao to watch the house and I locked the large bedroom and the study in front of her. I had already told her before I would, so her expression was still calm.
I thought about it and decided to give Su Qiao a key for the main door.
I won’t always be here to open the door for her. What if she had to leave for work and I wasn’t home when she returned. It wouldn’t be good for her to wait until I got back.
In terms of gathering information, if Su Qiao brought someone suspicious home, everything would be recorded on my listening device. I would easily find out if she was loyal to me or not.
I could also replace the lock for the main door once she leaves, in case she made a duplicate key.
Last time, it only cost around ¥200 to upgrade the lock. I could make the money back by making Shu Zhe blow a few more balloons.
I handed Su Qiao a brand new key and asked her to take care to not lose it.
Su Qiao was gratified from receiving the key I never promised to give her.
“I definitely won’t lose it.”
As if to reassure me, she found a red rope and hung the key around her neck.
Hey, hey, the key slipped into your cleavage! Well that works, since no one would attempt to steal it unless they wanted to be charged with sexual assault.
I spent a bit over an hour to arrive at film city by subway. As I arrived at the entrance to film city, I saw two shadows.
No, I didn’t call them shadows because they were far away, but because both of them were pretty dark.
It was Peng TouSi who was holding Obama’s leash.