Chapter 61

* * *Maru looked at Dowook as he drank his iced tea. Since when did Dowook care about him so much? As far as he was aware, they greeted one another every once in a while, but not much more than that.“Dude, are you okay? I’ve wanted to ask you since a while back, but you just looked so sad… Did something happen?” Dojin asked.Did Maru really look that bad? Bad enough to make even Dojin hesitate? Maru stared at his reflection on a mirror hanging on the wall behind him. ‘I guess it’s pretty bad.’There were all sorts of emotions flowing across his young face. Maru put a hand over it for a second. The memories from last night were still hitting him like a truck. He told himself he was fine this morning, but clearly he wasn’t. “It was just a bad dream,” he decided to tell them.“Was it a nightmare? Or did you get caught by your mom while masturbating or something?”“No, it was a really good dream.”“Then what’s up?”“It was too good of a dream… One that I didn’t want to wake up from.”What if he was still alive in that timeline? Thinking of that made him feel anxious again.‘The big events of this life haven't changed at all.’There was the world cup in 2002, and before that, the IMF. Would things change much in the future? Unlikely. No matter what he did, there would be events in the future that will remain unchangeable. What if his death was also inevitable? Would Maru be able to try to change that? ‘No, besides that...’He’s become even more desperate to meet his wife and daughter after his dream. He believed that he would be able to meet his daughter. She would be his little angel that arrives after he marries his wife.But what about his wife? What would he need to do to meet her?‘What would… What would happen to our meeting if I live a life that’s very different compared to my past one?’His past life was like a train track. As long as he rode on this track, like it or not, he would be able to stop at set stations. But right now in this life, there wasn’t just one train track he could ride on. There were countless tracks that he could create himself. In that case…How many of these tracks would lead him back to his wife? Maru subconsciously ended up turning to a rusty train track in his head. He knew how this particular train track ended. If he got on this one, he would repeat his previous life all over again. That is, he would be able to meet his wife again.‘Where did I meet my wife again?’He needed to remember. He had to remember.Bang. Maru punched his table lightly. Since the class was full of students talking to each other, not many people heard him. Dojin and Daemyung were looking at him with a surprised expression, though.“I can’t… remember.”“M-Maru, what’s up?”“Maru...”Maru could hear his two friends, but he didn’t understand them. Right now, Maru was entirely focused on trying to remember.‘Just yesterday… No, just this morning...’His other memories had all disappeared, save for that of his family’s faces. The memory itself wasn’t perfect, but just the fact that he could vaguely recall them gave him relief.Right now, he wasn’t able to remember any of it. He recalled what the woman had said yesterday. Something about this being their last meeting. Was this what she meant?‘That can’t be it. She said I would be able to recognize my wife.’Surely the woman wasn’t lying. She was supposed to be a representative for god. Surely he would be able to recognize his wife when they meet.“So I need to meet her?”“Maru?”“What’s up with him?”Maru raised his hand to silence his friends. He thought back on his previous life again.‘My… My daughter’s age was….’He couldn’t remember.‘My marriage. What was my marriage like?’Again, he couldn’t remember.‘...Where did we go for our first date?’Absolutely blank.‘My wife’s… name...’Nothing. The train tracks in his mind’s eye started to disappear one by one. In the end, there was just one train track left in front of him. One that he knew all too well already. One that… would eventually lead to his wife.“Hahh.”God was fair. At the same time, that’s what makes him so cruel.Maru put his hands through his hair, and gripped tightly. The pain didn’t help at all with his memories.

* * *Dowook observed Maru from his seat. It was kind of worrying watching the boy punch the table like that. Did something happen?‘Ugh.’Why did he have to get help from someone like him? Of course, Dowook felt pretty thankful about it, but Maru was just so difficult to approach.Plus, as a person who’s never said thank you to a friend before… he had no idea what to say.‘Maybe… Maybe when he’s calmed down a little more.’For now, Dowook decided to leave it to his future self.