────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
Chapter 23
“…I’m the one who’s sick, but you’re the one who’s more concerned about this.”
Albert said this with his eyes closed. Urk, I’ve been hit. I set Blanc down and approached Albert again.
“Prince, can you stand up?”
Albert finally opened his eyes.
And his red eyes were focused on only me.
Regardless of his physical condition, the look in his eyes was still clear.
Like the day I cut his hair.
The day we kissed.
“You must think I’m a joke, Rosé.”
He stood up with a faint smile on his lips. I checked his temperature and his forehead was definitely burning, but he didn’t stagger at all.
I wonder if this guy’s really human.
What kind of life did he live to have that much mental fortitude? How did he live for him to be equipped with that much grace and dignity?
I know only a fraction of Albert’s past. He lived a life so ridiculously different from King Impotent’s opulent life. And it was in Albert’s childhood that he lost everything.
It was too tragic to put into words.
Even so, he’ll ascend the throne and gain everything.
As if to urge me, he spoke.
“Let’s go downstairs.”
Albert went down the ladder first, then I followed behind carrying with me the pouch and Blanc.
Coming down to his room, Albert lay back on his bed. Literally, he just plopped down without even going under the covers.
Since this wasn’t something he normally did, I suddenly came to my senses.
I won’t be able to sleep tonight.
“Prince, I’ll get you some water so we can wash your face.”
It’s clear that he won’t be able to stand up in his current state, so he won’t be able to take a bath. I’ll at least wipe his face clean and place a wet towel on his forehead.
So, I went to the bathroom and turned on the faucet. The tower was complete with the basic essentials for people, so of course, it was also equipped with a clean bathroom that had plumbing.
I looked for a piece of cloth that was the right size, soaked it in water and then squeezed it out. Then, I filled a basin with water and prepared the towel.
Returning to the room, I tried to show the basin to Albert and placed it down on the table next to the bed.
With his eyes still closed, Albert was sweating.
If he’s left like this, it’ll be hard for him to move for a while.
Albert saw me return and tried to get up, but I just shook my head and spoke.
“Prince.”
“What is it.”
“May I touch you, Your Highness?”
A person’s well-being came first before the contract. It’s not time to play hot and cold.
“I know that this sounds really weird, but it’s not like I’m doing this out of self-interest…”
“Why are you trying to make excuses?”
“……”
“Even a fool would know that you’re only trying to take care of me.”
Strangely, those words stabbed at me. Right. I don’t have to make excuses. Why did I do that?
Then, offhandedly, Albert added.
“Do whatever you want.”
“Yes, thank you.”
I answered right away and picked up a wet towel.
I placed the towel on his forehead that was trickling with cold sweat, and Albert’s eyes gradually closed.
With the distinct feeling of wiping a saint’s statue, I slowly wiped off the cold sweat.
It’s absolutely difficult to think that these eyes, nose, lips belonged to a human.
It seemed like only yesterday that I signed a contract so I could survive our cohabitation, but I can’t believe that we’ve reached this point here, where he trusts me enough to leave his face to me.
While wiping him down carefully, I asked a question that I’d been itching to ask him since we left the north.
“Prince.”
“Yes.”
“Why did you hide your condition?”
Obviously, Liam would tell him to rest before we left. Schubert was a loyal follower, so if Albert said he was sick, Schubert would have taken action.
That place was a castle, and this place was a tower with only two inhabitants. The environment here was much worse.
He chose to go back to the tower even though there wasn’t any medicine here, let alone a doctor we could call to treat him.
“Even when we left for the tower, Your Highness hid your pain. I knew you were pushing yourself, but… Why did you do that?”
I felt regretful again.
“If you let me know earlier, I could have brought back medicine with us…”
As I wiped his forehead once more, Albert spoke with his eyes closed.
“Because I shouldn’t do that.”
“…What?”
The moment I asked back, Albert opened his eyes.
He stared at me for a moment, then calmly answered.
“I’m someone who mustn’t do that, Rosé.”
His words had many connotations. And it was just as Albert said.
With a bitter smile, he continued.
“Even considering the expectations I’m burdened with, I shouldn’t do that even more because of who I’ll be in the future.”
“……”
“It’s better to be sick alone.”
There was nothing as sad as being sick while living alone.
I still remember crying in sorrow because there was no one I could tell while I was sick.
But in Albert’s case, this was for his own good.
He was someone who would need to be numb from the pressure and the loneliness he was saddled with.
No, it might be more accurate to say that he was someone who’d grow used to this numbness rather than thinking he ‘has’ to be numb.
“If he knew I was sick, the Duke wouldn’t be able to rest.”
“…That’s because it’s Duke Masen.”
I still didn’t think it was right, but I understood why.
“Your Highness used up a lot of mana and you’re probably in a worse condition because the black magic must have gotten stuck on you. Why are you overdoing it?”
Liam also expected him to be sick. But I didn’t know that he’d be this sick.
“…What about when you leave this tower?”
I recalled his face when we left yesterday, and I was nervous from then on. At what I said, Albert nodded.
“It’s the same. The farther away from the tower, the more I’ll be in danger.”
It seemed like moving away from the tower wouldn’t completely make him free. I don’t know the pain he was going through because I never experienced it, but the traps that Rosteratu had placed must not have been easy to overcome.
Albert stared at me languidly.
“I can’t believe I’m confiding in you so obediently, but I guess I’m also rather relieved.”
“……”
“Normally, you wouldn’t be this frank.”
Then, looking down, I murmured softly.
“Don’t be too surprised.”
After dipping the towel into the basin and squeezing out the water, I placed the towel on Albert’s forehead.
What should I do with this guy?
If he showed me his weak side like this, it’ll make me want to comfort him. Because I knew he was human, too. And because I had also experienced something similar.
After contemplating it for a moment, I eventually opened my lips to speak.
“Prince. Please don’t feel pressured just because I pointed it out.”
Albert smiled half-heartedly.
“I know.”
The steadfast answer touched my heart.
…No, don’t be shaken. You’re just trying to cheer him up now.
I don’t know what kind of life he’s been living. I can’t even comprehend what kind of position he was in.
All I know is what Albert has shown me inside this tower. That was just a part of him as a whole.
So I can respect his choice.
But it doesn’t end there.
“If you’re sick, please tell me you’re sick.”
I don’t know what kind of gaze I have now, or what kind of expression I’m making.
Albert stared at me for a long time before he answered in a hushed tone.
“…Okay.”
When I heard his weak answer, I surmised that maybe I was saying the words that he wanted to hear.
“If you’re sad or having a hard time, please say that you are.”
“…Okay.”
Wasn’t it too tragic to live without having a friend you can confide in?
“I’m a bit dense, so I won’t know unless Your Highness tells me.”
If there’s no reason to make excuses, then just make a reason for it.
“I know what kind of virtues you must uphold as a prince, but if Your Highness can pay a little attention to this impertinent maid’s request, that would be nice.”
Has Albert ever told anyone that he was sick?
He might feel that it’s unpleasant to say it, though it wouldn’t be his own thoughts but his convictions doing this. He and I lived in different worlds, but even I can see this.
“Prince, can you let me know how you’re doing right now?”
“Don’t you already know, Rosé?”
Seeing him narrow his eyes, I smiled brightly.
“No, Prince. Like I said, I’m a bit dense.”
At times like these, I realized how fortunate it was that I’m a maid.
Albert doesn’t have to keep up formalities with me. Until the end, there wasn’t any reason for him to hide his feelings from me. Because I’m not a noblewoman who’s in the same league as him.
“Please say you’re sick.”
“I think you want to hear it more than I want to say it.”
“Please say it anyway.”
Albert couldn’t help but chuckle. Then, he spoke.
“I’m sick.”
It was a nice gesture, much like indulging a child to grant their wish. But it didn’t end there.
After he spoke, a moment of silence stretched between us.
Albert blinked.
He looked away, then his gaze headed back to me.
It was a strange gaze.
“How fascinating it is, just saying it. You can feel this way just by uttering those words.”
I don’t know exactly how Albert was feeling.
However, just by looking at his expression, it can be guessed that he was feeling something new.
It was a blessing to say that you’re sick when you’re sick, and to say that you’re sad when you’re sad.
I just wanted him to know about it a little.
Albert was still staring at me.
At the intense gaze, I grew shy, so I tried to avoid his eyes. I stood up.
“I’ll go bring some water for you, Prince.”
But then Albert held my hand.
Just as Albert usually did, his touch was neither too strong nor too light.
I turned back to look at him.
While he was lying down, it was so strange to see him looking up at me.
I was always looking up at him, but there were rarely any times that it was the other way around.
Like the day I cut his hair.
Albert spoke.
“I still don’t know why you wanted me to tell you that I’m sick, Rosé.”
“But I think you’ve already realized it.”
“Didn’t you say you’re a bit dense?”
“I have this much sense, Your Highness.”
At what I replied, Albert was silent for a moment. I don’t think I’d ever seen him actually speechless before.
“Why do you want to know whenever I’m sick, Rosé?”
“Because I’m the one who takes care of Your Highness.”
But Albert didn’t let go of the topic there. His red irises were like the deep color of a sun setting over a horizon.
Then, with a voice that was like a chain over my neck, like a trap that I wouldn’t be able to get out of, he said,
“Why do you want me to tell you I’m sad whenever I am?”
He wanted a proper answer.
After a while, I answered.
“It’s only human nature—a fundamental conduct that a person has to call them human.”
But of course, this would be something unfamiliar in Albert’s perspective.
And of course, I knew exactly why Albert asked that question.
There’s nothing special about him treating me in this way, so even if it completely slipped past him, he knew that this behavior was unexpected.
The fact that he regards me as a woman.
Of course, a man and a woman didn’t always have to be in that kind of relationship. If we avoid physical contact from now on, we may be able to maintain an appropriate relationship.
Romance won’t solve everything. It’s easy for him to come closer to me, but it wouldn’t be easy for me to approach him at all.
“Even until the bitter end, you won’t say what I want to hear.”
Albert smiled bitterly. However, rather than an amused smile, it was more like he was smiling in vain.
────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────