Chapter 78 - Slip Under The Sheets

Diminik Śliwiński sighed. Nowicki really hated Marczak. It was hardly surprising, in the end Andrzej, although he had been pursuing the profession of paparazzi he hated for a long time, had more sense of dignity and honor than Marczak, who tried to ...

Dominik shuddered. Marek hit Dominik, it was a fact. He hit him painfully and so hard that the actor shattered the table as he fell. He remembered his shock when Marek then twisted his arm and pinned him to the ground, brutally ripping his clothes off. How could he forget his humiliation and shame? How could he forget that the man he loved had stripped him of his dignity and reduced him to the role of a sexual object? And then, when he forgave him for this attack, Marek treated him like a whore again.

Memories raged in his head and Śliwiński wondered if he would ever really come to terms with what had happened. It all happened so recently, just over two months ago. He wanted to forgive Marek, that's why he accepted him today, he wanted to come to an understanding with him and free himself from the darkness that tormented him, so despite the pain he had to try to reconcile with Marek. But Andrzej was different. Perhaps he would be able to forgive his hurt, but never someone else's. Was that why he was angry?

A serious and honest conversation did not seem like a good idea to Dominik. He was sure that Nowicki would understand it, or at least try it, but at that moment the actor himself was not sure how he felt about Marczak, and even less he had no idea how he could talk about these strong, undefined emotions.

And how to reduce stress here?

"Oh, Andrzej," he sighed sadly and longingly, changing his clothes. "I love you so much…"

He slipped politely under the covers.

***

Andrzej knocked softly and, not hearing the answer, entered Dominik's room, trying not to make any noise louder.

"Why are you sneaking up like that?" He heard Dominik's question.

"I thought you fell asleep. You didn't answer when I knocked."

"Haven't heard, sorry."

"I brought you the promised medicines. Please."

The actor took the tablets without saying a word, washing them down with water.

"Thank you. Do I have to take a lot of them?"

"A lot, but mostly dietary supplements, vitamins and stuff. Four tablets a day of real drugs."

"I don't think you trust me since you give them away yourself."

"Maybe a little. You've been a bit distracted lately. I don't want you to accidentally miss a dose."

Dominik blushed - partly from shame that he was so clumsy, and partly from happiness that Andrzej cares for him so much. Even being angry with him, Nowicki did not stop caring for him.

The air between them, however, was heavy with tension, but different than ever. It did not spark with eroticism and was covered with suffocating moisture.

"Are you angry with me?" Dominik asked finally. He could no longer bear this atmosphere. He wanted to be close to Andrzej again, as close as possible both spiritually and physically.

"Why would I be angry?"

"I don't know, but if so, I wanted to apologize to you."

"If you apologize to me for everything without even knowing what for, I'll just get angry."

"So there is something ..."

"For God's sake!" after that cry Andrzej sighed loudly, irritated. "I'm not angry, but I'm a little pissed. And disappointed."

"It means?"

"I thought there was something special between us, real trust. True friendship."

"Because it is" Dominik assured him firmly.

"Really? So why don't you ever say that something hurts or torments you? How can I help you if you don't tell me something is wrong? You hide the truth from me, but to Marczak ..."

Andrzej was really angry. Dominik had the feeling that Nowicki was only stopping himself not to say too much.

"I ..." Śliwiński began slowly. "I had only him for seven years. Not only as a lover. I haven't seen my friends at school, even my family for years. It's not that I trust him more, it's just ... I can tell him everything because I don't care about him ..."

The silence was so dense, that could be cut with a knife.

"You're not telling me everything either" Dominik burst out reproachfully.

"Maybe not," Andrzej admitted glumly. "And some things I do not fully understand. But if you tell him that you are suffering and you are hiding the truth from me, maybe you should think again about who ..."

He broke off so suddenly that Dominik opened his mouth. It wasn't… jealousy, wasn't it? The actor's heart began to pound madly. There are different kinds of love and different kinds of jealousy. Continuing this topic could be dangerous, because if Andrzej is just discovering his emotions and does it not fully consciously, he may contradict them.

"So if I talk when I get hurt," Dominik changed the subject a bit, "or I feel bad when I'm too cold or too hot, won't you be mad at me?"

"I will not. That's what I mean, for you to tell me about such things. After all, only knowing the truth will I know how to help you."

"Then I'm cold."

"I'll get you a blanket," Nowicki suggested, and started toward the dresser.

"No, I want you."

"Don't be childish" Andrzej was tired and didn't feel like bantering.

"I'm not. I don't want the warmth of something. I want warmth of a human."

Nowicki looked at his beautiful, pale face, considering his options. He could ignore Dominik's request, turn it into a joke, or succumb to it. Two weeks ago, he would not have had such dilemmas and would just leave. Now he has learned to enjoy the young actor's closeness and the touch of his body. What was completely unthinkable with anyone else was becoming natural with Dominik. Andrzej had no idea how and when it happened, but the intimate closeness with the actor was not embarrassing, on the contrary, very pleasant.

"Move over," he said, and began to undress.

He left only his shorts on and met Dominik's disappointed gaze, staring like a hungry doggie at the bulge in his underpants.

Nobody had ever looked at Andrzej that way, and probably someone else's gaze would not be so wonderful. His whole body was beginning to react only under that delightful gaze.

Nowicki quickly slipped under the sheets, hoping he had time before Dominik noticed that his manhood was hardening.

He was immediately wrapped in soft, slender arms, wrapping his torso for themselves. A head surrounded by velvety, light brown hair slipped over his chest and clung to him tenderly irritating his nostrils with the scent of shampoo.

"How warm," Dominik purred, closing his eyes.

Nowicki's heart beat faster. If the actor starts to fawn on him, if he starts any erotic provocations, he will not be able to stop himself and will give him back the caresses. He would kiss him, lick him and bite him until he finally burst into his interior and would make love to him until they both died - and that was unthinkable, not now when Dominik was about to regain his strength. He waited tensely for Śliwiński's hand or his tongue to play and tried to control the flame of anxiety engulfing him.

Dominik, however, only settled on his torso and made no additional movement. Snuggled against his chest, he was breathing calmly, evenly, as if he were just falling into a peaceful sleep.

It was Andrzej who felt restless. His organ was stimulated by the actor's glance and now he had to politely wait until the excitement subsided, which was not easy when the hot, passionate body adhered to Nowicki almost with its entire surface. He had never been with anyone in such intimacy without sex, and he slowly began to find pleasure in her, unknown to him.

The heat of someone else's body. The touch of soft skin. The feeling of belonging to someone and the awareness that you are needed and loved.

Loved, he repeated the word in his mind. Does Dominik really love him? Really him, not Marczak?

This awareness was pleasant but also painful. Dominik, the sweetest, most delicate creature he knew, gave him the most sincere affection he could, and yet Andrzej was unable to reciprocate him. He hugged him tenderly and stroked his hair, but he couldn't shake the bitter thought that he had a man in his arms, not a woman.

No matter what, he thought, I don't know how lovely and sweet he was, I can't love a guy.

The realization made him feel sorry.

***

Andrzej woke up feeling a warm, soft body in his arms. He opened his eyes and froze. He lay tangled in an embrace with Dominik, who was in a deep, peaceful sleep.

To wake up as now close to another human being was a feeling that brought a smile to his face. Śliwiński cuddled up to him as if he were the last warm thing after the Ice Age.