Chapter 115 - Tenderness Of Love And Guilt Of Love

"Dominik, look at my eyes," Andrzej asked. "Dominik ..."

The actor did it reluctantly. But when Andrzej looked at those two angry blue stars, he bit his lip painfully. He saw their confusion and impending panic in them.

He had to do something, whatever, bring his lover back to his former, relaxed state.

"I love you," Nowicki continued. "I love you like a madman and I can see that something is wrong. Tell me the truth."

"I…" he turned his head. Lost, ashamed, as if caught in some sin.

"Dominik, tell me ..."

"I don't like it," he finally blurted. "I don't want to take advantage of you."

"Then don't do it. After all, I told you to do only what you want to do."

"But ..." the actor blushed up to his ears and looked down. "You like it."

What a darling little idiot!

"I like everything you do with me," he announced with a warm smile. "But what I like the most is having you in my arms, caressing, hugging and kissing every bit of your skin. That all" he wiggled his bound hands "this game was just meant to make you feel more confident. I have no such fantasies or needs at all."

"But he…"

"He is reacting to you moron, not to the game."

Andrzej did not even notice the moment when Dominik threw himself on his chest. Literally in a fraction of a second, the actor was lying on it like a fly to the honeycomb. He wanted to embrace him, but his tied hands did not allow him to do so. All he could do now was lie down and whisper in his lover's ear.

"You are the most important to me," he said. "It's been like this since I met you, although it wasn't love then, at least not like that. I guess. Ever since I had my first word with you face to face, I couldn't think of anything but your happiness. You keep saying that I never want anything from you. It's not true. I am a terrible egotist because I want your happiness from you. I am a terrible egotist, but the only real pleasure for me is that you are happy. Therefore, remember, do not do anything that can upset you. I love you so much it hurts."

Dominik got up without a word and took off his clothes. Nowicki saw his slim torso regain its elasticity, as if Dominik had started spending time in his home gym again. His arms were still not as flexible as they used to be, slowly regaining their firmness and strength. The belly was smooth as always, and so were the hips and thighs. Andrzej saw that the actor's member reacted to the nudity and the proximity of their bodies. It is true that it was just beginning to rise, but Nowicki was glad that Dominik was still excited. The actor straddled it again, but reached for his tie and untied it.

"Maybe someday," he announced. "Right now, I want your arms the most. Not erotic fun, real… closeness."

"And here we are unanimous" Andrzej smiled radiantly and embraced him tenderly, warmly, with all the love of his heart.

It's not that sex was completely unimportant, but he loved Dominik not for the fun and pleasure they gave each other in bed. He loved him because he was sweet, shy, naive and gentle, but extremely brave and strong. He was his fairy-tale princess to protect, but most of all someone who answered his heart's need to have someone.

So Andrzej caressed him slowly and tenderly, constantly remembering to include in every movement of his hands and his mouth as much hot feeling as he could. Soon Dominik returned the caress with the same hot emotions that began to burn their bodies. The love that contained not only reigns but most of all the sincere desire for the happiness of the other person made them burn. Time has lost its meaning. They didn't know the place anymore. They made love with a passionate tenderness they had never experienced before.

***

Since Dominik's abduction, Andrzej did not like the actor opening the door. Śliwiński said, however, that he would not allow that event to take over his life and when the intercom was heard he got up, gave Nowicki an expressive look and went to answer it.

„Franciszek Werner to Dominik Śliwiński. I humbly ask for a conversation. I am Maciej's grandfather."

At the mere mention of the man who abducted him, the young actor froze and his heart began to beat unpleasantly fast. He really wished he never heard of this man again.

But now Dominik was looking at the serious face of the man who looked as if he was approaching ninety years of age. The old man was still quite straight, except that he was propping himself up on a wooden cane.

Maciej's grandfather, thought Śliwiński. What could he possibly want?

Dominik felt an aversion to this man's grandson, not to him, so he answered politely.

"Please, come in."

The old man paced the space between the gate and the house as slowly as if it were a kilometer. Dominik, who was waiting for him in the doorway, felt a stronger pound of his heart and greater anxiety with each of his steps.

What could this man want from him? Why does he know his address?

Mr. Werner climbed the steps and looked up at him.

"It's you! It is really you, in person!" he said.

He was old and brittle. Up close, he looked worse than first impressions showed. He had sunken cheeks with liver spots and watery eyes. What could he possibly want?

"Please," the actor let him in.

Andrzej got up from the couch. He was as confused by the old man's visit as Dominik.

"Mr. Śliwiński, I won't take much of your time," the old man announced as soon as the door closed behind him. "I beg you, please forgive my grandson. He... he can't live with guilt. He tried to kill himself."

The words struck more suddenly than the lightning bolt from the blue. The news was absolutely shocking. Dominik blinked his eyelids, not sure if he heard it right.

"Well," Andrzej suddenly interjected, without any pity and without any understanding for the pain of the old man, who was talking about his grandson's suicide attempt. "I wish he could have made it."

"Andrzej!"

Dominik was surprised by his outburst no less than the information from the old man. He glared at Nowicki, but that didn't help. The photographer was furious.

"Do you know what your grandson did to this innocent man? Do you know? How dare you ask Dominik for anything?"

"Andrzej, stop it! I am sorry, Mr. Werner..."

Yes, Maciej did terrible things, but that was no reason to vent his anger on this weak old man.

"No," the old man cut him off firmly. "Your friend has a right to be angry. After Maciej tried to kill himself, he explained everything to me. I humbly apologize for his actions. They are unforgivable, and yet… And yet he is my grandson. My only surviving descendant. It is true that he deserved a punishment, a terrible but just punishment, but probably not death? Mr. Śliwiński, I am begging you... "

Franciszek Werner clung to his hand. There were tears in his eyes. Dominik wanted to free himself from this sobbing old man, but he was unable to shake him away. After all, this old man came to ask for grace. His, Dominik Śliwiński. He begged him with tears in his eyes for mercy... How strange that was!

"Let's sit down. Please." Dominik felt strange, insecure, but somehow he had to get through this sudden situation. "Will you bring us some water?" asked Andrzej.

Nowicki furrowed his eyebrows but without a word made the request and set the glasses filled with mineral water in front of them.

"Relax, Mr. Werner. Please."

"My God, you really are not an ordinary man," said the old man, staring at him. "I didn't understand my grandson, his obsession with you, but now..." he shook his head.

"Please, have a drink and calm down," Dominik handed him a glass of water. He did not understand what the old man meant. Maybe it wasn't really he who was talking, but some old disease that confused his mind?

"My grandson has always been a very sensitive child. Extremely gifted. He had a wonderful, vivid imagination that he cultivated like a garden. He has always had a weakness for things that are extraordinarily beautiful - flowers, poetry, even people. He built his own worlds and stories around them. My son and daughter-in-law were not, however, one of those people who would flatter his talents. He did not have an easy childhood with them and maybe that is why he ran away into the world of fantasy. He always wrote such beautiful stories ... Seven years ago, when he was graduating from high school, he became obsessed with you. He bought all the posters with you, he was in the cinema so many times that he probably spent all his pocket money on tickets. I thought it was no big deal. You were so popular back then that almost every teenager was constantly chattering about you. Each generation has its idol, its star. Maciej said that you inspired him to take up film and chose a film school instead of the planned history of art. He was in a boarding school, so I didn't have constant contact with him, but I should have known something was wrong. I should have noticed something. "

The old man hid his eyes in his thin hand.

"Only when I found him when he was putting the noose around his neck..."