Chapter 150 - You Can Depend On Me [2]

"I don't want to depend on anyone, Zichen" Shi Lian states, her eyes clear and calm. One of the important lessons she has learned from her father is that 'Never rely on someone, never beg to someone. Be your own master.' 

Zichen feels hurt and his face shows that too. He isn't trying to cross any line, all he wants is to know that Shi Lian is safe and not going through any trouble. He even stopped himself from digging out what she has been doing for the past few weeks because he knows she will be upset when she will know it. 

"Oh wait, have you already know everything? Are you just trying to get the truth from my mouth?" she scoffs, impeaching him for something he hasn't done. Shi Lian didn't mean to say those words but she is so angry at him right now that she doesn't care about his feelings. 

She sees his jaw flexing and she knows he doesn't like how she sounded. "I would never do that" he proclaims firmly. 

"Why not? You are the Prince of Underworld, you have got so much power, and taking out information about something is a piece of cake for you" she spits out venomously again. 

He is frustrated as he closes his eyes and takes a sharp intake of air. He is trying not to burst out. "I am only your boyfriend and as a boyfriend, I would not try to spy on my girlfriend."

Shi Lian feels at a loss for words. She thought maybe he will try to defend his title or will get agitated but he isn't. She wants to punch him but she cannot bring herself to. She is mentally exhausted. 

She looks down at her knotted fingers, trying to stop the emotions that are overflowing inside her. To her surprise, he scoots closer and takes her hand, caressing her fingers gently. She looks up and finds the same calmness in his eyes. The calmness made her feel at ease whenever she is fussing over something. He is her safe place. 

"I am sorry. I know it was the wrong thing to accuse you of something you never did. I shouldn't have demanded those things from you" he conveys, kissing her knuckles, "I beg your forgiveness."

The emotions are choking her. It's as if she let herself lose, everything inside she is feeling will burst out. She does not want to cry yet she can't stop the tears that are waiting at the corner of her eyes. 

"I was worried. I don't want you to go through any rough situation, alone. I am here for you, always" he tells with utmost sincerity, "I know you don't need anyone to fight your battles but whenever you feel you need a hand to hold, remember, I am always here. You just have to ask, that's it."

A drop of tear falls from her eye on Zichen's outer palm. She tries to wipe her tears but the more she does, she cries more. "Why do you always make me cry?" she grumbles between her sobs. 

He smiles faintly, "I am sorry for that too." He then cups her face and looks directly into her eyes. "I only wish to make you smile, laugh, and glow but I always fail to do that." 

His face is chiseled with distress and that Shi Lian feels sad too. She doesn't like to see him that way. It is now her turn to say something. "No, you do make me smile, laugh and most importantly, you make me happy. You give me the peace that I always need. You provide me the love and affection that makes me feel special" she expresses and she can see him turning red a little. She tries hiding her smile and continues, "You make me cry, you make me mad, you drive me crazy... God, you make me feel all sorts of emotions."

Zichen feels as if she is complaining about him snd he feels a little low. He escapes her gaze and looks down. Shi Lian notices that and smiles to herself. She takes his hand in hers and squeezes it to assure him that what he is thinking, he shouldn't. 

"You commit mistakes but you do apologize for that. And not just a simple apology but a grand one" she jokes making him laugh. "And I forgive you....because I like you so much."

"I forgive you" she adds with a small smile on her face. 

He leans forward and plants a kiss on her lips. "I love you so much that it hurts" he breathes out. Upon his confession, Shi Lian's heart starts beating uncontrollably. Her eyes widen and all she can think of is what he said. He said he loves her right? He said he loves her. 

"What's wrong?" he inquires, looking at her panicked face. She assumes he doesn't even know what he said. She wants to ask him but she is afraid. She is not yet ready to hear that word so soon. 

"N-nothing" she stammers, pulling away. "It's getting late."

Zichen feels she is trying to get away from him. Did he say anything wrong again? He thinks to himself. After what he did maybe she needs time to think about the situation so he stops himself from asking. 

"Alright. Don't overwork yourself" he tells her but it sounds like a demand to her. 

"Says the man who works for days without getting a blink of sleep" she retorts. He chuckles and reaches to open the door for her. 

"I'll see you later," he says and gives a kiss on her forehead. She hops out of the car and closes the door. It's already starting to get dark. How long has she been inside? 

She shakes her head and head inside her company. She stops midway and turns around to look for him. The car is still there but she cannot see what's inside the windows. It's all black. But she knows he is watching her. She turns back and walks forward. 

She is still thinking about his confession. 'I love you so much that it hurts' those words keep on popping inside her mind and she cannot help but blush. But then the question arrives what if he really meant what he said? What if he loves her? What if he proposes to her someday? Will she reply saying 'I love you? She doesn't know.

She is afraid because she has been in love before and as beautiful as it is, it has its dark side too. 

She once promised herself not to fall in love again. The Atian incident almost broke her and if the smell thing happened to her again, she will die from inside. 

She shakes her head and gets inside her office. She stops herself from thinking about it. She can't predict the future so it's better to think about the present.