Chapter 32 - Guilt

Saphira

"It's Zachary." Ben was quite now. "Do you want to go with him?" He asked softly.

"Obviously not." I rolled my eyes at him. "Good" He said smiling again. "How would I pay you back though?" I tried to come up with something.

"Dinner before the dance." He said stroking my hair now. "You want me to buy you dinner?" I verified. He rolled his eyes at me. "No, but I would like it if you'd cook for me though . Just the two of us." He pulled me onto his lap and kissed my forehead again.

Benjamin

It was midnight and my phone kept buzzing. I gently got out of bed, not wanting to wake Saph. I reached for my phone on one of the nightstands. It was Raina again.

"Hey Raina, this isn't a good time." I whispered. "Benjamin Al-Raji Saud; what is wrong with you? Does it take that little to get over Jasmine and forget about her completely, even though I told you that you she could be in trouble. You don't seem to care." Raina said in anger.

"Raina, that is unfair." I disagreed, walking out of Saphira's bedroom. "Jasmine had told me over and over again, that I should continue my search for a wife. I'll be damned if I have to spend my entire life with someone I don't love." I stated

"Love is something entirely different than screwing every female you see." Raina said, surprising me with the language she used. "Pardon me?!" I uttered.

"You know what I mean." She yelled. I sighed. Jasmine, was not something or someone I liked to think about. The more I thought about her, the more my lungs failed to work. Thinking of her felt like a stone pressed on my chest.

"Okay." I gave up. I paced around Saphira's living room. "Do you think there is something wrong?" I asked with a small voice. "Yes!" Raina breathed. "When was the last time you've talked to her?" I wasn't sure… I had been so busy with Saphira. I felt utterly guilty now.

I ran my hand through my hair. "I don't know." I shrugged. "it's been a while."

"Can we go see her?" Raina asked. "I have tests coming up." My head exploded. It was definitely a bad idea to see her again. "Maybe you could ask grandfather to send her over?" I thought out loud.

"I've tried that." Raina said. "And?" I urged. "There is this brother in law, that won't let her." Raina was quiet for a moment.

A brother in law? I didn't like the idea of another man who controlled Jasmine's life. Besides, why would he disobey the Sultan's request? "Who is he?" I asked. "I heard his name is Saeed Sheikh." Sheikh? Mhh…

"Ben?" Raina said in a low voice. "Yes?" I answered in the same tone. "You shouldn't give up on her that easily." Was I wrong for continuing my search? I enjoyed my time with Saphira… Did I love her? No, not yet. But I was sure I would very soon. Did I love Jazz? Yes I did unwillingly, but I did without a doubt.

Saphira

That morning I woke up and he was gone. I had trouble remembering if it all was just a beautiful dream or... My thoughts were interrupted by hearing a familiar voice behind my bedroom door. A voice that didn't seem to be long here. "Wake up, ya sleepy head." I heard Sierra say.

Then she just barged right in. "Get up." She said in a harsh voice. "I'm helping you get dressed." I looked at her, stunned. Was this for real? Sierra is going to help me, I thought. It didn't seem right. She helped me get undressed until I was only in my underwear and got a bath running for me. She was being very nice . She even smiled. What was up with that and where was Ben... My Ben.

She picked out clothes for me as well. A blue and white striped t-shirt and blue jeans. After that she even brushed my hair into a ponytail. That was odd. There was something really fishy about all this.

Sierra helped me get downstairs and Benjamin was in the kitchen. His eyes let up as soon as he saw me and then they went flat again. He wanted to take me over, but Sierra insisted she could manage.

"How are you feeling today?" He asked me nonchalantly. "Still a bit dazed actually." I said. "It was quit the evening." I said while flirting with him.

Of course I knew he was referring to me falling in the ocean and all. But I was trying to lay on thick that Ben belonged to me now. But obviously he didn't work with me. Did he NOT belong to me now?

He didn't respond to my flirting all day. I had this nauseated feeling in my stomach. And it had nothing to do with my health. As the hours past I began to feel very sad. Sierra and Ben teamed up to take care of me this morning. It was hard for me to watch them.

It was obvious they knew each other well. He didn't seem to give me the time of day and Sierra was all over him again. She hung around his neck and she even gave him a back massage, because he had complained he had twisted his arm while saving me.

The whole time I was right there in the room with them. It made me feel disgusted and used even. I couldn't handle it anymore, so I went upstairs and took a nap.

By the time my mom arrived, I heard Ben enter my bedroom. I acted as if I were asleep because I wasn't sure I had my emotions under control. He kissed my forehead and went out.

Mom was shocked to see me all pale. She wanted to get the week off, but I convinced her I would be just fine. She had put a blanket and a pillow for me to rest. Mom didn't want to let me out of her sight and I was fine with that, for now.

When the doorbell rang I jumped up.. My stomach twisted. Would it be Benjamin to check up on me?