Chapter 165 - [Bonus ] Sleepless

YOU. ARE. AMAZING. Your support of this book has been humbling to me. Thank you for continuing to come back! To say thank you, I have removed privilege from the Forbidden Prince for 2022. In the event I end up with time to do daily updates again, I may reinstate it. But for the foreseeable future, there will be no more need to purchase privilege to stay up to date. Except for the 1 coin tier (which I can't remove), none of the content will be held back. THANK YOU for being so willing to have paid the extra to read this story. You blow me away with your generosity! I hope to show you more Etan & Ayleth in 2022! (This message was added after publication so you won't be charged for the words.)

*****

AYLETH

She didn't know how much time had passed. Trystan had left a long time earlier, but she'd been unable to rest, to even undress. Falek had paced the room silently, but the twitching muscles in his jaw, the fierce clench of his hands on his sword hilt and the other in a fist… it had been clear what he was thinking. What he wanted to do.

"Don't touch him," she'd mumbled at some point, still sitting, slumped in the chair.

"What?!"

"I said… don't touch him," she forced through her teeth, and finally made herself raise her head and meet his eyes. "That is an order."

Falek came to a halt. "Ayleth, he has betrayed you. Utterly. Played us for fools—or become a coward. I do not know which, but—"

"Don't. Touch. Him," she said. 

Their gazes locked and dueled.

And she won.

With a muttered curse, Falek sprang into the pacing again, but this time, his eyes were hooded and flat. 

"It has to be a conspiracy. There has to be a reason, the question is whether he is that good of an actor, or if something frightened him—"

"Don't be ridiculous, Falek, of course he's afraid. He couldn't fake… what we have."

The bond bulged within her, just for a heartbeat and she went still. But it was silent again. She hadn't been able to tell what emotion he'd felt. The bond was stifled. Thick. As if they lay together, but each of them wrapped in thick layers, so when he moved, she could feel him, but not discern which part of him touched her. She shook her head. 

Fanciful wishing. That's all those thoughts were. 

Her husband had betrayed her for another. The question was why?

It had occurred to her eventually that Falek wasn't going to leave until he thought she was able to rest. So she'd pretended sleepiness—but she did not have to fake the exhaustion. Against her will Falek called in a maid and Ayleth had had to pretend she was simply unwell, until the girl had helped her undress, then put on a nightgown, and brushed her hair.

When the maid left, Falek still paced—but in the sitting room now. His shadow passing back and forth over the rectangle of light around her door. He wouldn't leave her alone, he vowed. She said why not? There was clearly no further danger of the Summitrans stealing her away. They'd had their chance and passed it up.

He'd growled something fierce, but she'd waved him off and told him to go to his own chambers. She would speak to him in the morning. He'd posted guards at her door, but she didn't care. She wasn't going anywhere.

Instead, when she was finally alone and in the dark, she stared at the ceiling. And her mind tripped back first to the thrilled thoughts she'd had for this night. The hopes. But those were too painful. She rolled over in bed, wincing, only to find her mind filled with the memory of the night before, when she'd gone to him. When she'd expressed her fear and… and he'd comforted her.

"Ayleth, look at me," Etan had said, his voice low and dark. She'd been tracing the lines of his collarbones and palming his chest. She'd stilled her hand, but didn't raise her eyes.  She was afraid of what she might see in his.

"Look at me," he'd insisted and she felt his voice vibrate under her hand. Her eyes cut up to meet his from under her lashes to find him staring down at her. "Good, now don't look away. You remember me here with you in this moment—remember my face, remember my voice. And the next time you're scared, you bring this to mind with my words…" he'd whispered, his fingers combing through her hair first, then cupping her face. His thumb trailed across her cheek. "Tomorrow is a very, very dangerous day. For me. For you. For us. But no matter what happens—do you hear me, Ayleth? No. Matter. What. No matter how impossible things might seem, or how determined others might be to keep us apart, you remember that you are the love of my life. My wife. The one the Father of Lights made for me. And that will never change. No plot, no contract, nothing can ever change my heart for you, Ayleth."

She'd reached for him, fighting tears. "It's the same for me," she whispered. "Nothing will ever stop me loving you, Etan."

He nodded. "Now, if things get scary or look uncertain, you remember this: They can tear us apart. They can imprison me—even kill me. But it will not stop me loving you. They can't touch that. Do you know that, Ayleth? Deep inside, are you utterly certain of it?"

She nodded. "I am," she whispered. "I do know that, Etan, because that's how I feel as well."

He'd sighed heavily and kissed her, a soft, slow brush of his lips, then pulled back to meet her eyes again. "Good," he said. "That's all we need to hold onto. No matter what comes, they cannot steal our love away. They can't even touch it. Remember that, Ayleth, if things go poorly."

She'd fought tears. "I pray they won't," she whispered. "I pray and I dream that they'll accept us, and—"

"No matter what, Ayleth—remember. Say it with me."

"No matter what," she had repeated…

Staring at her chamber ceiling in the dark the memory took on an entirely new texture. How could it be, she wondered? Had he known? Of course he'd known. That was why he'd said it. But the design for this plan… what was he doing? What had driven him to this place? Ayleth knew Etan loved her, that their bond was real.

What she couldn't fathom was how he could walk away. What could possibly have happened, after all they'd weathered, that would make him decide to do it?

And should she trust it? 

Had he abandoned her for whatever purpose he was serving, noble or not? Were those warnings simply to keep her holding on until he was out of reach and she couldn't get answers? Or had he warned her because he didn't want her to give up? Were his words true on the surface? Or did he continue to play some kind of game?

She rolled over restlessly. There had to be a way to speak with him, to corner him… to force him to answer. She could, perhaps, set Falek on him. Falek would find a way to him, she had no doubt. But could he hold his rage in check? Or would her man kill her husband in defense of her heart? She would have to decide before morning so she could give Falek instructions before everyone was about their business and it would be harder to find him alone… 

Then she froze as her mother's words from the feast echoed in her head. Such simple words, yet so profound. Had her mother had any idea the weapon she unleashed with them?

"So many are announcing tonight and will leave in the coming days. Are you certain?"

"I am certain, mother," Ayleth said easily. "No one of any account will leave before the end."

"Well, that's true. And I can only be pleased to see the back of the Summitrans," her mother sneered.

A tiny curl of dread began in Ayleth's stomach. "Oh? They're leaving quickly?"

"Tomorrow, by all accounts. And praise the Goddess for that…"

Ayleth sat bolt upright in bed. 

The Summitrans were leaving in the morning. 

If she was going to talk to Etan it had to be tonight. 

She flew into action. 

*****

NOTE: Updates will now publish for FORBIDDEN PRINCE every Monday (in the US)/Tuesday (elsewhere). There will be a minimum of 2 chapters per week.. I apologize that we lost a couple of weeks there, but as I had to complete the writing for KING OF BEASTS, there was no extra time. I hope you enjoyed these catch up chapters, and I will do my best to make sure you don't miss a week again! THANK YOU for not giving up on me, Ayleth, and Etan!