Chapter 198 - Like Water On My Skin

AYLETH

As Etan drew her forward, the rush of the water thundered around them, its mist spraying so the little swimming hole at its base was shrouded in a vapor that curled and billowed towards them. The waterfall was as broad and thick as her horse, pouring from rocks high above their heads and falling into a deep hole, the water so clear at the banks that she could make out the pebbles under it on the banks.

With the trees clear in this spot and the morning sun at their backs, the entire clearing sparkled in a thin, shimmering coating of water spray.

"It's so beautiful, Etan!"

"Yes, we found it on our way here and I remembered it… I think we could both use a bath," he said dryly. "But also… just some time."

He looked down at her and she took him in—the rakish hair, tousled with sweat and dirt,  falling into his eyes because he'd run his hands through it. The circles under his eyes that shadowed them with broken sleep, and the physical weariness of travel.

His skin was dusty, but his shoulders still thick and broad beneath the jacket he'd worn through the night. She longed to unbutton it and run her hands over his chest, but he released her and walked to the edge of the water, letting his eyes climb the wall of water as he worked the buttons himself.

When he jerked the sides of his jacket back and his arms were revealed, this muscles pushing at his shirt to its limits underneath, Ayleth swallowed and walked forward to take the neck of the jacket and tug it off his arms for him.

It was a little snug, so she grabbed the cuff of one arm to slide it off, then the other.

When Etan turned to her, his gaze warm but wary—watching her for signals—she tossed the dirty jacket to the grass and stepped forward to begin at the buttons near his throat. As she loosened them and his throat was revealed, his collarbones, then the beginnings of his chest, her heart fluttered, and the bond began to sing.

Etan had stopped moving and stood simply watching her, his eyes never leaving her face.

"I love you, Ayleth," he said, his deep voice tight and raised slightly to be heard over the water. "I'm so sorry that I hurt you."

"I thought we were pretending that hadn't happened?" she said by way of distracting herself from the churn in her stomach whenever she thought of that night, watching him take Sarya in the banquet hall—standing with her, bowing to her parents—

She turned her head away from the memory and gritted her teeth, working the lower buttons on his shirt quickly, her little fingers nimble, until finally she could push the sides of his shirt open, tug the tails out of his breeches, and lay her hands on him.

"God, Ayleth…"

She took a deep breath as she flattened her palms on his chest, letting her hands slide down to his abdomen, her fingers following the waves of his muscles.

His stomach tightened under her touch and she finally looked up to meet his eyes.

"No one can hurt me as you can, Etan," she said as quietly as she could and still be heard. "I have never felt so vulnerable in the hands of another. And yet… never felt so safe."

"Ayleth, you're my life—"

"I know, I know. I'm not trying to press you to more declarations. We're here. We're married. We've chosen each other. I want to bathe you and lick you and… and just be together. But you brought it up. So let me tell you, now, for the last time… I forgive you, Etan. It may take me some time to relax. But I believe you. I trust you. And I know your intentions were good, even if I believe your choices were wrong. Just… do not ask me to celebrate the way you tore us apart. I cannot do that."

"I never would," he croaked, reaching for her face.

They stared into each other's eyes for a long moment, then Ayleth smiled. "Then let me enjoy you."

Etan raised an eyebrow as Ayleth reached for the buckle of his belt. She had it unclasped and sliding through her fingers in seconds. And despite their weariness, despite all the desperate lovemaking over the last couple days, when she reached for the buttons, his leathers were already bulging under her hands.

While she worked at the buttons—now tight and under pressure—he reached for the buttons on her blouse. She'd discarded her cloak on her horse and he made short work of freeing the buttons in the linen of her shirt. He was already loosening her trousers and sliding his hands under the waistband to cup her ass when she finally tugged his leathers down.

They separated to remove their shoes and trousers, but it was only seconds before Etan was leaning down to pick up the little bag he'd brought with them and reaching within it to draw out a precious bar of soap.

Ayleth smiled. "You've thought of everything."

"I only think of you, Ayleth. That's God's pure truth."

She sighed happily and walked to him, pulling him close and taking his lips, letting their bodies press warmth into each other as she wrapped her arms around his neck, and he leaned his big body over hers, their hearts thumping in time.

Then, without warning, he leaned down and lifted her off her feet, swinging her legs up over his arm and holding her to his chest as he walked into the cool water.

Both their skins pebbled with the shock of it, and Ayleth gasped when he reached waist-height in the water and his steps splashed her back. But Etan just grinned.

"Are you ready?"

"Ready for wha—"

Etan let himself drop, still holding her, deep into the cold water. Ayleth spluttered, gasping as the shock stopped her breath.. But he never let her go, only let her legs drop and pulled them around his waist so she sat in his lap, bobbing in the water together, clinging, her nipples peaked and hard against his chest.