Chapter 473: How Can You Know?

"I will be acting as the vanguard of the force, I hope that you will all accept this unless one of you has a problem", he said. 

Du Xiu looked around the table to see if anyone did have anything to say but they didn't. Everyone there understood his intentions clearly.

He had been clashing with Kong Zhi from the beginning and from then till now, their fight had been less than satisfying to this commander. What made it worse was the fact that he could not kill Kong Zhi himself. Instead, the demon was sacrificed to the Hundun Clan to become their new Idol of Chaos.

"Alright then, and in my place, Commander Bi will be taking on the offensive force to combat Kong Zhi's army. Does anyone have any objections to that?", he then asked. 

The camp commander looked at him in surprise but accepted the order nonetheless. 

"I will accept this position!" 

This towering figure stood up and bowed to Du Xiu. And then Zi Jing continued their discussion. 

"Alright, we'll need to people manning the defenses as well as fortifying them. More barriers need to be set up, whichever experts are still here, I will need to speak with. Most likely the Idol of Chaos will target the Nuwa Clan first and Kong Zhi's army will..." 

From there, the talks continued for an entire day. Of course, the Idol of Chaos was brought up several more times, countermeasures to defend against it. There were dozens of documents on the table, reports on their resources, the number of soldiers, what kind of soldiers. 

By the end of it, the Commanders and their captains all had their work cut out for them. All armies had been broken down and restructured into three groups: one for attack, one for defense, and one for the Idol of Chaos.

Fortunately, Ming Yue's role had long been decided. Even if they didn't choose for her, she would've done it nonetheless. 

She had clashed with the Idol of Chaos just like how Du Xiu had clashed with Kong Zhi several times. She didn't even take down the previous one, it had been taken over by Du Xiu's disciple. As for where it was, that thing was long gone. 

Whether or not it would come back to help, Ming Yue didn't know. 

For now, she had to focus on one thing and that was the Idol of Chaos. 

"The True Idol of Chaos is going to be much stronger than the other one but is that all? What else is different? It can't just be pure power, can it?" she thought, "Could I even injure it? Even if I managed to complete return to simplicity, doing it with my knife or the sword that Commander Zi Jing provided... It might not be enough." 

The young cultivator stared out into the lake, seated by the edge. 

"I really am going to need my sword soon."

She muttered quietly with a long sigh that someone happened to hear. 

"Is something wrong, girl? You seem quite worried." 

Ming Yue turned to see who had just spoken to find Commander Du Xiu of all people. She immediately stood up to greet him, cupping her fists and lowering her head. 

"Commander Du Xiu."

He chuckled before standing by her and sitting down. He was not donning his armor but dressed in a normal uniform, not even his weapon was by his side. 

"You don't have to greet me like that, we're in the same squadron now. Besides, even though I hit hard, I'm much better at taking hits."

Du Xiu smiled, thinking that she was worried about her role. Even though she was his junior and of a completely different cultivation realm, Ming Yue was tasked with striking that thing. Everyone else was to defend her first and attack the Idol of Chaos second, including Du Xiu. For anyone else, a responsibility like this was daunting, some would feel that they are unfit. 

And she was worried, worried that she could not fulfill this responsibility. 

"Even then, I don't know if I can even injure that thing. I was able to do it before with just my dagger but... with this, I truly don't know", she said. 

The commander looked at her before staring forward, gazing at the peaceful lake. 

"So your sword is in this very lake, nourished by a mystical being. How envious. Certainly, if you had it, our chances would soar but we can't depend on that can we?" he said. 

"I know but... I am not strong enough. No matter how much stronger I get, it always seems like I'm never strong enough. It is..." 

"Frustrating?" 

"Yes, it's frustrating." 

For the first time in a long time, she confided in someone. As for why she had done so to Du Xiu, it was because he was much older, experienced, stronger. In fact, he was the strongest individual she'd ever met, the only people to have come close to it would be the Thirteen Messengers of the High Council. 

Heaven knows what they had been doing this entire war but their presence did not lose out to any of the commanders, not even Du Xiu. 

A calm figure who could provide guidance no matter the circumstance, that was who he was to her. That was the type of person he was to most people. 

And when he heard what Ming Yue said, he chuckled. 

"Good, it is good for you to recognize this early on. Discover it too late and you'd find yourself stuck", he said, "The path that we take is one of no reward, not if you strive for strength."

"I know", she replied. 

Du Xiu then looked at her. 

"You know but you do not understand, that is a very big difference. After all, it is common knowledge that the path of cultivation is a harsh one, but not many have truly experienced it. How can you understand but never experience it?" 

"That's..."

Ming Yue had never thought of it like that. 

"I see," she muttered. 

"In any case, how can you know that you will fail? That you would not be able to fulfill your role. The battle has yet to start and the enemy has yet to appear. It's still a bit too early to start doubting yourself. Take it from me, someone who has always dealt with doubt."

With a smile, he stared out into the lake, admiring the scenery. 

"I walked a path no one has ever taken. People doubted me, believed that I would fail but I did not. Never once did I doubt myself, not out of arrogance or confidence but determination. No matter what, I kept pushing forward. It was not without sacrifice but in the end, I'm still pushing forward." 

Ming Yue looked at him, studying his expression. His eyes were calm and peaceful, he was at ease but at the same time, there was a sense of experience she found difficult to fathom. A mix of reminiscence and sorrow was what she saw. 

"Would I ever have eyes like those?" 

She couldn't help but wonder. 

And after sharing a few more minutes gazing at the quiet lake, Du Xiu stood up and gave her a small and calm smile.

"Now, I need to go back, there's quite a bit of work to do", he said

The commander then stopped and turned to her. 

"Doubt is the mind's worst enemy. Remember that. "

With these parting words, he left her alone. With time to contemplate, she continued to stare out into the lake. Having spent so much time here, this view had always been soothing to her. For the first time in a long time, she had spoken to someone else about her thoughts. And for that, she was given words of advice. 

"Doubt... what a scary thing."