661 Those Past Events

Xiang Wan pursed her lips and did not say a word.

He was such a fanatic with regards to hygiene, almost like mysophobia…

How did he survive then?

Cheng Zheng's eyes started to get watery. "My mom hated him. Even in my dad's presence, she refused to show him a nice expression… Of course, I'm the same as well. I don't like him. Right from the first day he came to my house, I don't like him. But he…"

As this was about Bai Muchuan's past, Xiang Wan listened attentively as Cheng Zheng spoke about it in a low tone.

"He has always been smart since young and he's also street smart as well. It was only after I grew up and realized that the him back then already knew how things had changed for him, his home changed, his family changed and his identity also changed… He tried to get close to my mom carefully and tried hard to get along with me. He didn't even need my dad to force him to call me brother…

"It was a pity that back then, I was too young and couldn't understand the feelings a kid like him going to another unfamiliar family, that he would have felt fear and helplessness… I ignored him, just like my mom. We gave him the cold shoulder and made him feel like an outsider…"

"After that, he was transferred to my school. I don't know how it happened but there were people who knew about my ties with him. These kids made really awful remarks. I started to quarrel with them and got beaten up instead. When my mom saw that I got beaten up, my mom thought that I had a fight with him… This was because he was also hurt all over and even got home very late."

"That night, he was reprimanded by my dad. I didn't put in a word for him and he never offered any explanation as well. The next day when I went to school, I got to know that he took revenge for me by beating up those boys and locking them in the toilet. That was not all, he even took the hose used for watering the plants to go through the toilet window and sprayed them with water… It was winter and I could already imagine the pathetic sight they were in… At that time, I was really glad about it.

"He got detained by the teacher and when the teacher asked him to call my dad, he replied that he doesn't have a parent. The teacher almost called up my dad… At this moment, I went to the teacher and told her that I'm his brother, as well as his parent…"

Cheng Zheng looked up at the ceiling. His eyes went red and his voice sounded broken.

"He probably took this sentence to heart and regarded me as his real brother and parent. After that day, he was really good to me… It was different from the usual ingratiation. This time, it was sincere… If anyone talked behind my back, he would go beat them up. There were many rumors at school and he didn't give a hoot to those rumors about him. But if he heard anything bad about me, he would go confront them… Because of this, he didn't have a good reputation at school. He was labelled as the school bully by the kids."

Xiang Wan didn't interrupt him and listened on.

Cheng Zheng, however, stopped talking.

Xiang Wan waited for a moment. "Why did you stop?"

Cheng Zheng seemed to want to sob but he tried to show a smile. "You still want to hear about it? What happened later was not so pleasant."

Xiang Wan: "There are always some not so pleasant things in one's life."

Cheng Zheng rubbed his forehead. "At that time, I couldn't hate him anymore. He might have noticed this and was especially close to me. He wasn't polite with me at all—he would take my things and eat my snacks… When I thought about it later, maybe he didn't care about all these things as my dad never scrimped on him… He should have done all of these to get attention. He wanted someone to show concern and dote on him. After all, he was a child."

Xiang Wan asked, "What happened later?"

Cheng Zheng puffed a sigh. "Later on, I caused him… to get sent to that Special School."

Xiang Wan's heart sank.

So, this was why they fell apart with each other.

"Why did you do that?"

Cheng Zheng squinted his eyes, seeming unwilling to face this. "That time, I had no idea what kind of school that was. I only did that to make my mom happy…"

Xiang Wan kept quiet.

Cheng Zheng looked at her. "Do you know that ever since he came, my mom couldn't sleep well at night and would cry every day. In just a few months time, she seemed to have aged by 10 years more… This problem was aggravated when my mom found out that my relationship with him had gotten better. When he started to call me brother and I would indulge him in that… My mom almost went crazy and even yelled at me hysterically."

When he said that, his eyes were filled with a gloomy mist. "I've never seen my mother look like that before. Her eyes were wide-open and the veins on her face seemed to be bulging. She pointed at me menacingly like she was going to kill me… She said she hated me and that I was not the son she gave birth to… I had no choice. Xiang Wan, I really have no choice."

He repeated that twice. That felt like he had said something that had been pressing on him for a long time.

"As he was always beating up other kids at school, my mom advised my dad to send him to that school… She said that that special school was specially formed to educate those delinquents. It adopts the military-style of educating kids; the accommodation was good, teaching was good and they would take care of the kids' daily lives just like a full-time school. They would learn and train up which were most suitable for kids like him… I thought that should be a good place for him. Once he left, my family would be back to normal and my mom wouldn't cry anymore…"

Xiang Wan thought for a moment. "You were also a kid back then. You don't have a say in this matter, so you need not feel bad about it."

Cheng Zheng shook his head and smiled. "My dad didn't agree at first. No matter how my mom tried to persuade him, he wouldn't budge. Hence, I made use of his trust in me and deliberately organized a fight. And as he helped me fought those kids, he landed up at the police station… I pushed all the responsibility to him before my parents. I described him as a hooligan and a school bully. I even told my dad that I've been bullied by him, that he would always take my things without permission…"

"And your dad, believed you?"

"He did. This was because I never lied. I've always had good results and good performance at school. Moreover, the words that I said… many people were able to vouch for that. In a way, what I said were half-truths."

Xiang Wan felt a tug in her heart.

Little Bai!

She wanted to return to Little Bai so badly and to give him a hug.

She wanted to tell him not to be afraid and everything would be fine…

Xiang Wan rubbed her eyes and held the urge to cry. "He didn't fight for himself, right?"

"He didn't. He said nothing and only gave me a glance. After that, he lowered his head, took his bag and left." Cheng Zheng heaved a heavy sigh. "Over the years, I still remember the look he gave me. I feel that our brotherly ties with each other broke from that very look of his."

Xiang Wan kept quiet.

She was an outsider to what had happened in the past.

She was someone who was unable to participate and judge.

Everyone had their own perspective, she couldn't blame Cheng Zheng and tell him directly that what he did was wrong.

"So…" Cheng Zheng puffed a deep sigh. "I'm here because I wanted to make amends. Xiang Wan, you need not feel bad about this. I didn't do this for you. I did this for Bai Muchuan. I don't want him to get into trouble and ruin his future. If he could save you, I'll be assured…"

"…"

Xiang Wan did not know what to say.

Cheng Zheng seemed to have really relaxed after talking it out. "I still want to thank you. Xiang Wan, before I got to know you, I've never really scrutinized myself seriously and I didn't think I was in the wrong. I'm arrogant and apathetic. You're the one who made me take a good look at what I'm like."

"You don't need to feel this way…" Xiang Wan felt a tight feeling in her throat. "I don't think Bai Muchuan ever blamed you."

"Really?" Cheng Zheng laughed.

"That's what I think. Even if he wants to blame someone, he could only blame it on fate. However, I feel that… he might not even blame fate." Xiang Wan looked at him seriously. "This is probably the difference between Bai Muchuan and other people. He's really good. No matter what kind of environment or situation he was in, he would still uphold his values."

…