Chapter 649 - Sleepover (4)

Imagine a small circle. You were inside that circle. A strong layer of glass, stronger than titanium, surrounded the outline of that circle. It towered as high as the sky, you simply couldn't see an end to it. But you could see the other side, the glass was so clear you only knew it existed when you bumped into it.

Now, you pound your hands against the glass. It was your only choice because you couldn't escape the circle by jumping, and you couldn't use any magic. You could only watch the other side, you felt like your heart was breaking, you were right there. You were so close, it was almost like you could reach out to them.

However, you couldn't do anything. You were struck inside that circle. You could only move inside that circle. You could yell out to them, hoping that they can hear your screams. But you knew best, the things you could do were limited. It was different from running to the other side to do something yourself.

This crushing feeling, this sense of false hope. Wasn't this the feeling of true helplessness?

My nails left faint marks on my palms, waking me from the pain. I needed to be sane. Taking a few deep breaths, I held in my tears. It was up to me if I'll let Luke humiliate me in front of my friends. So instead of dejectedly dragging myself back to the gaming area, I chose to hide my face by plastering a confident smile.

'Are you ok?' Shelly mouthed.

"I-I'm think?" I awkwardly swallowed.

My heart wavered as Shelly opened her arms, one of my few friends who truly understood my feelings. I wanted to cry, I needed comforting. So I changed my mind and nodded to accept her offer, dashing to cry inside her arms.

"I only wanted one day. It was too hard to give me a day compared to the other six days in the week," I found it unfair.

"You can come to our next sleepover," she hugged me.

"That schedule isn't going to change for the rest of middle school. I won't ever be allowed to go on another sleepover in my life!" I tragically knew.

"Is it too hard to give Rika a day off?" Shelly turned to Luke.

"Her skin is slightly pink since you used too much force in wiping her face," she lied.

"Her cheeks are always slightly rosy," Alex instantly supported Luke.

"It's fine, Shelly. Luke has always hated Rika. Rika has always felt his hatred towards her since the beginning of kindergarten," I gave up on my sleepover.

"I told you. I don't hate you Rika. I have never hated you before," Luke placed his documents down again.

"Well you don't love me, or like me, the only thing left is indifference, dislike and hate," I chose the most likely one.

"What made you think I hated you?" Luke gestured to come to him.

"If you didn't hate me, why would you always lecture me that I was lacking in something?" I couldn't understand.

"I wanted you to improve. You can't get better unless you fix your mistakes so you can succeed next time," he revealed.

"If you didn't want to intentionally torture me by separating me from the people that I'm close to, what would be your purpose? You never let me visit my friends outside of school and social week anymore," I wondered.

"You needed that time to catch up on everything you were behind on. There were also issues regarding the lack of security. You know there are more people after you with the information leak," he didn't trust my friends.

"What about those warm greetings you gave to Delia and Sienna every morning? You always frown when you see me or coldly look down on me," I crossed my arms.

"See, you have nothing to say. It's obvious you hate me, even strangers treat me better than you. They don't shout at me all the time to pressure me into thinking I'm worthless," I continued when he stayed silent.

I stiffened when he started to walk towards me. What did he want to do now? My eyes widened when he sat down on the sleeping bag, immediately pulling me away from Shelly. I froze from his unexpected actions, apologizing to me, "I don't hate you Rika. It's the opposite. I only treat you this way because I care about you."

"I want you to know you're irreplaceable to me. You're not worthless," he began to ċȧrėss my hair.

"What book did you read to replicate this?" I tried to pull myself away.

Only an idiot would think Luke was being genuine. He had an image to save, especially in front of my friends who came from influential families his family couldn't ignore. Meaning, there would be a scandal if people figured out he was abusing his authority over his poor partner.

"How do you have those thoughts in the first place? It's obvious that Luke doesn't hate you," Alex got up from his chair to join us.

"It's because both of you equally despise me," I wasn't falling for their act.

"In fact, you're worse than Luke. It goes beyond the level of hate. You always wish I would die," I concluded from living with him.

I nearly rolled my eyes as Alex's eyes seemed to deepen with guilt, trying to prove otherside. It was laughable. It was common knowledge for those inside this clubroom that he either disliked or hated everyone here except for Luke. Even Shelly couldn't disagree with me, knowing I was right. To improve my strained relationship with them, it was best to never see them again.

"I don't hate you, the most it'll go is dislike," Alex sat down in front of me.

"You don't have to lie," I sighed.

"Everyone already knows the truth. If I died, you would be the happiest person on my funeral day," I could imagine inside my head.

"But I would be sad," Luke's eyes glistened.

"Your funeral would be the most miserable day of my life and I-we would do anything. Anything to prevent it," his shoulders slightly trembled.

Was it just me, but was he using another spell without chanting? I was in awe of the light shifting to place the spotlight on the supposedly pitiful boy. I gave some bonus points on him trying to put more emphasis on his skinny frame and his young age. His voice wobbled, "we don't."

"Alex doesn't hate you and I have never hated you. We don't despise you." he wiped his eyes.

Luke purposely blinked enough for his eyes to cry without looking suspicious. Instead of using his handkerchief, he used his sleeves to wipe his tears running down his cheeks. However, we both knew he probably had more than ten spare handkerchiefs in his inventory.

"Are you satisfied now?" Alex nastily turned to me.

"Why don't you help your cousin then? You're right next to him," I pointed out.

There was no one who was better at looking incredibly wronged than I was. I had years of experience, I was a master at it. I scoffed at Alex pretending he didn't hear me, suddenly busily opening and closing his hands.

I sighed. It was obvious they were working together. I was starting to feel suffocated. I wanted Luke to let me go, to stop squeezing me so tight. My hands pushed against his ċhėst,

"I'm a useful tool to you. Isn't that the reason you're tolerating me? You don't have to hide it. You can stop with your act now."

They only wanted me for my potential in possessing an unlimited amount of mana. It was the main reason their families wanted me to stay close to them, wanting to take advantage of my abilities later. In fact, I had never seen them so happy when they discovered Luke could have the same ability through me. And I couldn't find a more loyal person to their family than Luke.

"Don't ever think you're a tool. I have never thought of you that way and no one in our family ever will," Luke knew what I was implying.

"Why not? It's obvious. I told you it's nothing new to me. I had these thoughts since kindergarten," I wondered if they thought I was stupid.

"Rika knows you hated her since she came to the first district. She knows you're good at acting," Shelly wasn't affected by them.

"She always waits for the day where your family will find another girl who has the potential for an unlimited amount of mana to take her position," she knew my despondent hopes.

"Since when have you known?" Luke turned to her.

"Near the end of our first year of kindergarten," Shelly puffed her ċhėst.

"Was this what you were implying in elementary school? The day you'll finally become free when your partner's family finds someone to replace you?" Oili recalled.

"She told me the same too," Ethan went through his memories.

"I would help with the search if I had more spare time," I nodded.

Only my recent friends didn't know about my long-time thoughts. Unfortunately, my ability only appeared in someone once every five thousand years. Almost mystical to the point most people wouldn't believe it would exist. It was comparably rare as my second chance card written in ancient documents that were mostly missing.. I had extremely bad luck to land in this time frame when I reincarnated into this world.