Chapter 45 - A Sorry Me

Chapter 45: A sorry me

Mckenna felt her heart jump. It was a terrible mistake, one she didn't know she made. She had forgotten about it. And Jason could have called her to remind her but he didn't. Partners were supposed to have each other's back. If she forgot about it, he should have reminded her.

"Jason, I am sorry. I forgot about it" Mckenna sounded apologetic but Jason wouldn't let it go.

"You know she asked me whether you hate her-" Jason was interrupted by Mckenna.

"Of course, I don't hate her! Why would you ever think I do?"

Jason was quiet for a moment. He run his hands through his hair for a moment.

"What is going on, Mckenna? I can't help you if you don't talk to me"

Okay, now Mckenna was getting irritated. She forgot about an appointment not a kidney transplant. He was making a small thing bigger.

"Nothing is going on, okay? I forgot and I am sorry. Now, can we move on"

Mckenna turned to leave before it turns into a big fight but Jason wasn't done.

"Do you remember the day we first met?" Jason asked her.

Mckenna stopped walking. Why were they talking a walk down memory lane?

"16th October....What does that have to do with anything?" Mckenna was puzzled.

"The first time I kissed you?"

"The next day, so the 17th... again why?" Mckenna turned to look at him.

"My point...you have a God damned photographic memory. It means you are incapable of forgetting anything but somehow you forgot a school appointment. You come home drunk knowing fully well you have a six year old in the house. What kind of a parent does that?"

"She is not my kid, she is yours!"

Mckenna regretted it immediately it came out of her mouth. She hated that Jason had this nasty habit of pulling a loose thread until it unrolls and leave the person wearing it totally naked. It wasn't fair.

"Wow! I guess that settles it" Jason felt like the air was knocked out of him. 

"I didn't mean that. Why can't you let a sleeping dog lie, Jason? I am doing the best I can but she is stubborn, opinionated and truth be told a little bit annoying" Mckenna was loosing her mind.

"Don't talk about her like that!"

"And you? You are blind to her faults. You can't see anything wrong and you are driving me crazy!" Mckenna yelled at him.

Everyone had their breaking point and this was hers. She wiped her face with her hand and sniffed back.

"It's the little things Jason... it's the little things that drives me crazy" Mckenna was close to tears. "Little things like last week, when she refused to leave the front seat of the damn car!"

"I diffused the situation, didn't I?" Jason asked her.

"No. No, you didn't. You asked me to drive with her sitting beside me while you sat at the back of the car because you couldn't deal with a six year old throwing a tantrum. At the end, she took off her seat belt and crawl to the back to be with you. I was your Uber driver that day!"

Jason had no idea she was hold back so much from him.

"Oma, that was one time"

"No, Jason. It happened severally and whenever, she sees us together, hugging or talking or intimate with each other, she flips out and suddenly there is an emergency that requires your attention" Mckenna felt her eyes filling up with tears.

"She is my daughter" Jason whispered.

"I know"

"I didn't set out to adopt a kid, Mckenna. I just fell in love and I knew she was mine"

"I know" Mckenna felt the first drop of tears on her cheeks. She cupped his face gently as she spoke. Tears ran down her cheeks.

" I love you so much, Jason. You are the only man I have ever loved but...I need a break. I need to figure out what I want"

Jason felt his heart constrict for a second. He felt like he was going to have a heart attack. He cleared his throat "What are you saying, Mckenna?"

"I am saying I need time to figure out things and so do you"

"I have everything figured out already. I want you and I and Kara to be a family"

Mckenna felt so much sadness.

"Except you don't. You keep saying you want me to be a mother to her yet you keep undermining me in front of her-" Mckenna was interrupted by Jason.

"I didn't. I swear-"

"You bought her that stupid bag, even though I told her she couldn't have it."

"I had no idea, Mckenna. I didn't know. She said..."

"And that's the problem. It's what she says all the time. I will be at Elena's for a while...so take care okay?"

Jason grabbed her hand and kissed it. "Don't go...I am begging you. Don't leave me" Jason whispered to her.

Mckenna couldn't control the tears any more than the heavy weight she felt on her chest.

"I just need space to think...just for a few days. I just want to feel my feelings without feeling guilty that I am having them. I need a break, Jason"

Jason pulled her even closer to himself. He felt his entire world on the brink of exploding.

"Don't walk out on our marriage. Couples fight all the time and they figure things out. Don't you dare leave me because things got too difficult! Don't you dare!"

Mckenna kissed his cheek and walked out.

Jason could hear how rowdy his respiration was. It's wasn't a surprised he was finding it difficult breaking in air. His lungs weren't expanding enough and the ground beneath his feet were beginning to get away from him.

To avoid falling down, he sat on a chair immediately. And to quench the dry throat that suddenly appeared, he took the glass of scotch beside him and poured it down his throat.. Tears slipped from his eyes as he blinked.