Chapter 70

Chapter 70

The snow flurries.

The carriage carrying Eric was going through the blizzard. Eric, finally waking up from the haze of alcohol, leaned back on the backrest with his eyes closed.

‘Wake up.’

Daniel’s words ring in my ears.

‘Madam is not here!’

Still, why did he see Chloe’s hallucination? Looking at Andrea, whose physique, age, appearance, and everything were different from Chloe, why did he mistake her for Chloe?

Eric felt sorry for himself and was miserable at the same time. If he knew he loved Chloe this much, he wouldn’t be so mean to her, he’d admit her right away and love her unconditionally, and he wouldn’t hurt her by saying things he didn’t mean to her….

He realized that this was the ‘regret’ Daniel was talking about as he was going crazy. Because regret was originally a feeling felt when one beats their chest over an irreversible situation.

Irreversible situation.

Yes. He couldn’t turn back. It meant that Chloe, who has become a light bulb that no longer lights up, couldn’t be made to go back to the past.

Why?

Why would…he?

As he continued his self-deprecating thoughts, the carriage rattled and pulled forward. Eric grabbed the edge of the chair and managed to keep himself from falling though he couldn’t stop his legs from bending. It split on which his prosthetic leg was attached.

Eric frowned and pulled up his pants. He could see the slightly cracked surface, perhaps the previous shock had been strong.

Leaving it like this, it wouldn’t be long before it broke, so he thought that he would have to fix his prosthetic leg after he went back, so he put down the pants he had rolled up before throwing his head back and leaning against it.

Disgusting piece of metal. He muttered.

The source of his intention for treating Chloe badly was simple. It came from the fact that he was a person with a disability and that the source of this disability came from hunger, and therefore the two words, disability and poverty, would never be separated from his, in other words, inferiority.

…Inferiority.

Eric had an inferiority complex… to Chloe, to the people, to the world.

No matter how good he was, he was a commoner. No matter how much money he had, he was only a man with one of his legs cut off. No matter how much he aimed to change the world… he couldn’t erase the fact that he was once a street child who roamed the streets.

The past was always a red mark through his life, and for this reason, he harbored an inferiority complex in everything because he saw everything in the world as better than himself.

It was Chloe who made this inferiority complex explode.

Chloe, who was always a noble person. Chloe, who was a woman with an unbreakable loftiness…

She was a perfect woman born into a perfect family. Eric judged her like that, and that judgment was enough to make him misunderstand her, and he put up a wall in his heart that he shouldn’t love her.

The walls were so solid that they couldn’t accept Chloe’s existence. So, he misunderstood the relationship between her and the Duchess. By doing so, he hurt her again and revealed that he didn’t trust her…

Oh, why would I do that?!

Eric regretted it once again, but he couldn’t turn back. He had so many things to do. Why did she ever love him like this? He thought her love was holy and sublime, while his own love was insignificant. Chloe has always been self-sacrificing, but he himself has always been terribly selfish…

What should he do?

What should he do to change his mind, and what should he do to save her? No, how could he make her have the will to live?

Eric thought this was the homework he had to solve, yet he had no idea how to solve it.

He sighed repeatedly at the hopeless situation and suddenly cast his eyes out the window. Perhaps he had arrived in the north before he knew it, he saw the castle not far away. Eric loosened his tie, feeling frustrated at the thought that he was back here again.

Tilting his head back and clenching his fists, he held back the urge to scream.

The North was a place full of bad memories for him. He was born in the North, grew up in the North, and had his leg cut off in the North. Most of what occupied his life were done in the North.

So, he hated the North.

He hated this place so much that even turning his head to the north gave him goosebumps. But even so, the reason he came to the North was because of Chloe. To see her, to have a brief conversation with her.

In retrospect, it was all because he loved her. However, Eric didn’t know this at the time, so whenever he saw Chloe, he couldn’t overcome the sudden feelings of inferiority, and he only said mean things about her to her.

“Darling.”

“I’m sick.”

“It hurts so much. So…”

If only he had listened to her properly… If he only asked where and how it hurts…!

If so, wouldn’t Chloe have answered him? Would she have said that her life was short and that she was waiting to die? Would she have changed if he had? Things like this could not have happened!

Eric buried his face in his hands, holding a heart full of remorse, regret, and self-blame for his own actions. The breath that came out of the teeth was so sorrowful. Nevertheless, despite this, nothing changed. Chloe left him, and he couldn’t hold her any longer.

That was all of the current situations.

“Are you here, Master!”

As soon as Eric arrived at the castle, employees came out ahead to greet him. Among them, the butler was the most passionate though it seemed that it came from a sense of crisis because he changed most of the servants at once.

Because of that, the butler greeted him wholeheartedly, and Eric lifted his chin as he took off his coat. He looked around.

The castle hadn’t changed at all from when he left.

The quiet stillness flowed, and even the subtle iron smell was the same.

Because of that, he couldn’t help but feel a little weird. It had been several months since Chloe, the mistress of the castle, had been away, although it was strange that nothing had changed in the meantime.

Was it that there was no presence of Chloe in the first place? So, how did she live in the castle?

“Chloe’s…”

Eric opened his mouth slowly.

“Show me to her room.”

He didn’t even know where her room was. Realizing this stabbing fact again, he took a deep breath and looked at the butler.

“This way, Master.”

The butler guided Eric in a neat manner.

They walked a long way. Climbing one floor, and another, and one more, and when he reached the fourth floor, the butler started walking down the long hallway again. With each step, Eric could feel his breath choking in his throat.

…Has it been this far away?

How many years had she been stuck in a corner room on the fourth floor where there was no heating?

Eric wondered why Chloe, the mistress of the castle, had been confined to a room like this, but he soon remembered that the castle’s employees had not treated her as a proper mistress, and he felt deep sadness at her unfortunate situation.

He should’ve paid a little more attention.

Even though he regretted it now, it was already too late. Chloe had suffered from this cold for several years and had become ill.

“This is it.”

Soon, the butler pointed to the old door and said. Eric could feel his mind go numb again, still, he struggled to catch his breath and spoke to the butler.

“Yes. You can go back.”

“Are you going in alone?”

“Yes, and don’t come up until I call you. Don’t let come up.”

“Understood.”

The butler obediently listened to Eric.

After seeing the butler turn his back and disappear, Eric finally put his hand on the doorknob.

To enter or not…

After thinking about it several times, he thought again about why he should be worrying. This may have been because he had a hunch that if he opened this door, he would regret it irrevocably. So Eric hesitated, but he couldn’t go back when he had already come this far.

In the end, he turned the doorknob.

There was a creak, and the door opened. Eric slowly entered the room.

__