Chapter 11 - THE TALE OF CLAIRE GORDON

THE TALE OF CLAIRE GORDON

A small, cold place where light never entered. The sound of water could be heard as it dripped –  drop by drop. She felt an uncontrollable pain in her body and didn’t even have the strength to squeeze out her tears.

As if she knew her current situation was miserable, she laughed bitterly to herself. What big sin did she commit? When she looked back at her life, it was doomed from the beginning.

Maybe she shouldn’t have been born. All of their eyes gleamed with disgust when they looked at her. This image was burned into her brain. 

She wanted to be in a warm room and wanted to eat hot, tasty meals. In her current room. most of the time she was served putrid food scraps as her meals. She could only eat flavorful dishes in her imagination and force her mind to create an illusion that she was warm. She couldn’t even gather her strength to snap her fingers. Squeaks of rats were heard from time to time as they stole the bread she sometimes left in the room.

Her vision went blurry. In that narrow space, at a ceaseless temperature, her tears started to roll down without her notice. 

I don’t want to die like this.

She felt like she was trapped underneath black water and slowly closed her eyes to ease the ache.

She wished for someone to come and save her.

“Huuhh!!”

A big soft and fluffy bed. In the middle, as if buried in a mire, a girl slept but the girl soon sat up with hard breaths. She now lived in a room many times better than that narrow space, but her mental state was not better.

The child woke up with a pale face and body that was covered in cold sweat.

With her small hands, she tightly gripped on to the soft blanket that covered her and slowly sat up. Her hair was damp with sweat. Her mind was hazy as she couldn’t tell apart her dream and reality. Her unfocused eyes wandered.

It was neither the small room that she used to live nor the place she saw in her dream. She was not cold or hungry anymore. As proof that what happened till now was just a dream, the nightdress she wore was made from the best quality silk.

The ceiling was engraved with intricate patterns and her canopy-bed was attached to bed curtains. The big windows at the side of the walls were covered with thick, soft curtains.

Claire carefully got up from the bed. What her feet met was not a hard and cold floor, rather warmth that was emitted from the soft carpets. The softness from the carpet calmed her mind as she took comfort from that warmth.

The air outside her blanket was ice cold. Was it late night or early morning? She could see the dim lights, which meant that it could also be dawn. Claire felt a slight chill – still she dragged her small body towards the window and opened the curtains. She silently looked outside those windows.

“Ah….”

It was currently dawn while the morning sun peeked at the horizon. She looked at the scenery with an awe-struck face.

This was the first morning after she moved to her new room. The memories about her first meeting with Beth popped into Claire’s mind.

A few days before she met Beth, the Earl came to her to vent his anger on her. Her whole body throbbed with pain, but as always, there was nobody to care about her. She felt thankful that her wounds didn’t fester. Claire lived her life where she was deprived of others’ affection, but still had to be thankful for those small interactions.

Someone knocked her door and Claire thought it was the usual maid until she came in.

The girl with a light brown hair stood there and looked at her with a shocked face. An unfamiliar remark was brought up by her.

My Side.

Beth promised Claire that she would stand beside her side, always.

That word was very unfamiliar to her. What does it mean to be on my side? she thought. Because she didn’t understand what the word meant, Claire just looked at the maid whom she met for the first time with guarded eyes.

Beth always came to Claire whenever she had the time but never really did anything big for her.

She just told her about today’s weather, current news, and sometimes she also shared her portion of food with Claire. That was all.

There were also times when she brought warm water and with great difficulty and wiped her body with a towel. She also washed and trimmed Claire’s hair. Beth also had a very strange expression which according to Claire, was very unique to Beth. Only after a week did she understand that it was called a ‘smile’.

When Beth came to the tower, she felt uncomfortable. She felt uncomfortable because of the fast throbbing in a corner of her chest. She also found Beth’s soft tone of voice very strange. The way Beth always raised her had to pat her and not beat her like the others. She couldn’t understand at all.

One day she had bought white bread for her. It was soft and tasty and she finished it quickly. Later, she found that Beth had always brought her share of food to give to her.

Once she was pretty badly hurt when the Earl vented his anger on her once again and as usual, she huddled up into a ball, waited for the pain to numb her senses. At that time, Beth came in.

Beth’s expression at that moment was more shocked than the first time she met Beth. After that, Beth ran out of the room.

At that time she didn’t know and thought Beth would never come back to her ever again. Because all along, there was none who stayed behind for her.

But she felt more scared than when she faced an angry Earl and felt like her heart was about to stop. Beth, whom she thought would never return, returned in a hurry hugging a variety of medicines.

She felt tingles and pain when the medicine was applied, but strangely the pain subsided away.

Claire stared at Beth vacantly, who applied medicine with a concentrated gaze. Thick and luminous brown eyelashes, under that, warm, green eyes. At that moment, Claire realized that she very much liked those green eyes. It was like those tree shades that she enjoyed from the small windows of her small living space.

She realized at that moment. Ah, so this is what it means to take one’s side. So this uncomfortable feeling was what others call Happiness. 

I was happy on the days Beth came.

These feelings had always been an unknown thirst in her. Affection, Love, Happiness.

Claire felt Beth was a miracle that came to her.

After her arrival, Claire’s environment improved a lot. She became the precious daughter of the Earl Mansion, according to Beth.

Beth said it like that and she just believed her words.

She put her palm on the glass slides of the windows and felt as if a cold breeze brushed against her palm.

She watched as many people moved to the rear of the Garden. They were the employees who woke up before the sun rose and started their day. She moved close to the window and checked for Beth among them.

A long time ago, Beth had told something like this to Claire. The hair color of Milady is really very beautiful.

Isn’t Beth’s hair color also beautiful?

Um, my hair colour is very common out there.

When the sun rose, its rays brought warmth everywhere they shone. These same rays poked into her eyes and made her tear up.

When the suns’ rays shone upon Beth’s hair, it looked like fine gold – more brilliant than anything else.

Even if Beth was in a crowd, she could find Beth with a glance. She then saw her walk sturdily with a straight back and gaze.

Why won’t she look back?

She tapped at the windowsill with her fingers to her disappointment. Still Beth didn’t turn back.

She then had a conversation with the maids that were around her.

“Um?”

There was a man that she had never met before, who stood at Beth’s right side. It was natural for her not to know since there were not many people Claire interacted with.

But for some reason, Claire felt very bothered about that guy. She stared at him with a piercing gaze for a long time.

She then realized that she felt uncomfortable since it seemed like the man and Beth were on intimate terms.

Even if their conversation was not intimate, Claire had no way of knowing this as she stared at them with an open gaze.

But before long, they both disappeared from her field of vision and only then did she take a breath.

She put down the rolled up curtain and went back completely under her blanket.

It’s silent.

She felt a chilling cold as if the sun had gone down.

Claire felt her dream would be broken once she pulled back the blanket, so she stayed under those covers and closed her eyes.

Since she already saw Beth, she won’t have nightmares anymore.

No, even if she had nightmares, Claire had assurance that Beth would come to save her. For her, the existence of the person named Beth was the biggest miracle that happened to her.

The cold feeling disappeared without a trace and warm air hovered around her.

That’s right –  it was not wrong to call this a miracle.